Coasting around the coast on the Coast to Coast Rally!

[gijoe1313]

Well once again ladles and germs, your effervescent purveyor of surrealistic ride reports is on the prowl again today.

I was informed at last moment by Donor, that the 2009 Coast to Coast ride required my attendance. Being that Donor and I have hardly ridden together lately, I was more than enthused to be in his company.

So late last night 2330hrs, I quickly registered online of my intention to attend. All good and well I thought and chuckled to myself. Up at the crack of dawn, when dogs lie still and cats scamper for the warm spot on your bed - I was bustling about at 0630hrs, get in a large bowl of rice bubbles and brown sugar (just love that "snap, crackle and pop").

Locating my accoutrements and panoply of riding, I donned gear and hurly-burlied myself to chez Donors (only to find him gone to pick up ... an Ambulance! :scratch:), with that plan scuppered I zootled off to Blue Thunder who would be riding one of St John's ST1300 Ambo bikes.

Eventually it seems the whole crew of St Johns has turned up - and I discover Donor is driving! :gob: Turns out that they needed two to crew and had no-one qualified to drive, so Donor steps in for the 2nd time in a year and takes one for the crew! :niceone:

So, with one Ambulance and two Ambo bikes (plus the Big Ol'Hornet and I), we make our way to Karioitahi Beach. A pleasant ride and by the time we got there, the rally was in full swing, bikes were coming and going - finding a place to park up, I awaited for our little party to depart. The organisation was great, little pre-cut squares of plywood were provided for stable parking on the sandy shores of the event.

It was here I discovered that my late, late entry was not in the system so I had to fork over all the cash in my wallet. Skint I was except for some coins rattling around my personages. For my $35, I got entry and a rally badge to be sent to me at a later date.

Also scored a free bag of goodies, I munched down the muesli bar, pocketed the pen and stashed the rest in the Ambulance (which at this moment is still ensconced in said vehicle! :doh:). A wee lad was passing out chocolate pebbles, which I also wolfed down.

Eventually, we geared up after some confab about the directions and setting of waypoints into GPS units and the game was afoot! Actually, I knew this would be a pernicious and vexing day for me, the milage was limited and there would be a lot of stops, not my cup of tea at all, no sir, I do not like it! :oi-grr: But, there was the greater good to consider and I resigned myself to enjoying the day! :yes:

Pic 1 : The registration table was a very busy place, the Lifesaver club put on a $10 brekky, which looked absolutely scrummy! :drool:
Pic 2 : Donor (Nigel) and his off-sider Graham, posing like manly men surveying the land under their dominion (basically the place where they were standing on)
Pic 3 : The Ambunaught that would follow the rear of the rally
Pic 4 : Cycle 1 and Cycle 2 (original call signs designed by Donor)
Pic 5 : Blue Thunder going over details with one of the administrators of the rally

[gijoe1313]

Well, as the ride went underway, I was riding behind the two Ambo bikes and the Ambulance chuffing behind me. Good time was made from the beach through Waiuku, into Pukekohe and out through to Huntly.

There was a poker run also nestled within the travels for the day, basically a card given at each checkpoint, your registration number written on a random card and given to make up a hand. The first card came at the checkpoint near the power station and we pulled over for a while to provide eye candy for the other bikers pulling up after us.

Was very amusing to see the St Johns staff practising the art of fluid removal from bladdery containment organs! :sick: I spent the time perving at a nice Predator parked up nearby :love:

Pic 1 : Parking up by the road to have a quick ciggie and collecting some poker cards

Pic 2 : Not much business going on here!

Pic 3 : :love: Predator mmmm mmm, Big Ol'Hornet was definitely admiring the lines on the new girl! :msn-wink:

Pic 4 : A bit of a chin wag by the side of the road, luvverly day for it! Popo came by with a smile and a wave

Pic 5 : Don't those Ambo bikes look the bizzo? They definitely attracted a lot of attention from passerbys and those that they passed! :niceone: The last Coast to Coast provided funds to help equip the bikes.

Pic 6 : Bikes started to come and go from all directions, most picked up a card and quickly sped off to their next destination.

[gijoe1313]

Here dear viewer, I warn you to shield and not molest your tender foibles with the terrible visage of St John staff in the call of nature ... I warned you!

My curiosity was piqued when I noticed these uniformed men of stature scamper willy-nilly into the undergrowth.

Snapping of branches and grasses brushed aside emanated from within the dank and dark reaches of the flora.

Like David Attenborough, I waited with my optical imagery capturing device to see what wild acts of nature would transpire. Dear viewer, it is not a pretty sight! :sick:

Pic 1 : A furtive shuffle, a sound like the ripping of metallic artifacts being displaced, followed by the tremulous sounds of liquid being evacuated from a height and impacting upon flora and heath

Pic 2 : Exhibit 1 - Big foot (re : Taniwha)

Pic 3 : Exhibit 2 - Sasquatch (re : Things That Eyes Were Not Meant To See)

[gijoe1313]

From the heavenly haven of Huntly, we toed the line to get to Tahuna, we took the moronway express and off at the Ohinewai/Tahuna juncture and tracked quickly to the Tahuna Pub. A large gathering of fine velocity improvement machines were in evidence.

I availed myself of the facilities to empty my bladdery containment organ and also investigated a bee sting to my throat that occurred during my travel to the pub. Much glee and mirth was evinced by the St John crew, Donor producing a credit card to scrape the offending stinger and poison sac without much success. :slap: He then plucked it out with his surgeon like fingers and pronounced that I would live.

By this stage, a run-down van carrying a full passenger load pulled up, it backfired black smoke and had a hard time firing - a moment of "you don't see that everyday".

At this stage, the Predator was nearby the Big Ol'Hornet again - who must have been in heaven perving at the sleek and gorgeous lines of the new hot model. :sunny:

Collected another card, this time a 9 to match my other previous one! This is looking good! :niceone:

Pic 1 : Tahuna Pub, come one, come all!

Pic 2 : The skillful and sublime skills of St John crew as they artfully conceal their vehicle, utilising the natural environment to blend in with

Pic 3 : Gotta luv' those ST1300s! (and no the Preddie is not present in this shot!)

[gijoe1313]

The next stop was in Paeroa, it was a quick pace from Tahuna and Willem took over from Blue Thunder as lead bike (Willem was the other St John biker) since this area was his stomping grounds.

The approach to Paeroa was to enjoy the Food Festival, to which we had free entry gratas of the organisational skill of the Rally administrators. Parking up, we wandered across to survey the offerings. Expectant of huhu grub patties and possum pie, we found the local Lions tent and scoffed down the snarler in a sandwich more to our palate. Ornithological matters were also pursued with vigour.

A professional dialogue took place between the local St John crew and the ones touring the land evinced much mirth and commentary. I took copious photos when Blue Thunder laid out the contents of one of the Ambo bikes ... and very enlightening it was! :yes:

Eventually, we saddled up and prepared to make our way to find some proper food in Waihi!

Pic 1 and 2 : Showing off the gears to the locals

Pic 3 : Can never have too many shots of a cool bike!

Pic 4 : Big Ol'Hornet wondering where the Predator got to, funnily enuff it was only about 6 bikes down! :shifty:

Pic 5 : Wait, what is Donor doing?

[gijoe1313]

Well, Donor with his usual impish charm latched onto a budding young St John neophyte and introduced her to some of the equipment he uses! (ooer! :o)

Quick as a flash, he had her trussed up like a lamb to the slaughter and then proceeded to marinate her around the field. From there it was all downhill when he proceeded to give excellent and clear advice how to operate said equipage.

The ease with which this procedure was done is marred by the fact that should one need to undergo this procedure, you have truly gone and done something silly with yourself! :pinch:

Overhearing his comments how the metal stretcher has been broken by morbidly obese patients, how he did his back in several times and other job related injuries makes me grateful for my own earstwhile profession of trying to edjmacate the slovenly masses for the future! :innocent:

[gijoe1313]

In the words of Blue Thunder ... if you ever see this kit, which is highly unlikely since you will be incapacitated ... you are in serious, serious trouble! :no: :sick:

The pannier he opened on the Ambo bike was one that does not get used often, if it does - it means some serious FUBAR going on! :pinch:

So odds and sods and bits and pieces which I cannot begin to name, suffice to say I did hear about one item, which if you attach a device to, pumps up a small ball to prevent vomit going into your lungs! :gob:

I must admit, it does look rather cool ... but heaven forbid the implications! :buggerd:

[gijoe1313]

From Paeroa, we decided to find some nosh in Waihi - during our ride there, we came across a lass on a cruiser stricken forlornly by the side of the road, Blue Thunder being chivalrous and embodying the biker code to stop and see ...

Turns out the rental bike was out of gas, no reserve to speak of! Luckily it was a quick trip for the Ambulance to pick up a gas container for the hapless lass - and much mirth encountered when Donor had to explain the facts of life to the servo attendant.

Well as we waited for the precious liquid dinosaur goop to arrive, the plucky lass notices my KB logo fading on my red camo pajamas! :blink: Turns out the plucky hapless lass is none other than Woodybee from the mainland, up to visit the Norflanders! :lol: Small world innit? :yes:

So anyway she ends up riding with us and our party grows by two. (Woodybee and the bike natch!) At Waihi, we chat about things over some nice beef products encased in pastry and Woodybee texts McJim about the turn of events! Och ay'th'noo!

Stomachs filled and the fueless bike is refueled, next stop is Whitianga via Tairua! Almost there! :sweatdrop For once, Donor is not helping me with a refuelling visit! :o

Pic 1 : Passerbys thought something serious had happened ... what with an ambulance and two ambo bikes!

Pic 2 : Woodybee getting down and dirty ... compromising shot this really! :o (Donor and Graham "can I be next please?")

Pic 3 : Mmmm precious liquid dinosaur goop make broom broom go vroom vroom!

Pic 4 : Filthy biker scum parking anywhere they like, I dunno! :rolleyes:

Pic 5 : Blue Thunder, Woodybee and Willem ... and Big Ol'Hornet!

Pic 6 : Filthy ambo biker scum parking anywhere they like, I dunno! :rolleyes:

[gijoe1313]

With the time pressing upon us, we left Waihi and made our way to Tairua, the winding roads of Whangamata was all too short - but since we were the tail end charlies, by the time we reached Tairua, the checkpoints had all closed up and packed off. No more cards for us! :crybaby: A bit of confusion struck our group at this stage as riders went all over the show! :scratch:

Trying to find the non-existent checkpoints I gather! :slap:

Eventually back on track again, the twisties up through Tairua towards Whitianga were enjoyable (once past the slower vehicle traffic). By the time we pulled in, the end debrief was well under way (Oldguy even said he was there for a couple of hours already! :gob:)

Saw some familiar faces and good news for Woodybee as she won a spot prize! Blue Thunder and the crew had to man up for a quick presentation speech and well done that was! Prizes for winning poker hands were held and the usual talking heads ensued. By this stage I was well skint of money and I requested the lend of a tenner from Donor to help with the go-gas. I left early and rode the rest of the coro loop by myself ... very enjoyable that was!

Turned out I didn't need the tenner since I managed to get to Thames BP before it closed up and I could use my fuel card :woohoo: Caught up with some other groups and got myself quick sharp back home via the long way of Miranda and the back blocks of the hunuas through to the Bombays!

All in all, a great day - nobody required the services of St John, the weather held up and the company was great! (meeting Woodybee was the cherry on top)

I wholeheartedly recommend this event for one and all to attend, serves a great cause, takes in some good roads and mixes it up with fun and the usual bike pr0n fest! :devil2:

Let's just hope Donor can actually ride his bike on one of these eventually! :rofl:

Pic 1 and 2 : Mmmm moar bikes! :drool:

Pic 3 : Oh yeah, the Mercury Bay Club wasn't it? We got lost trying to find the place and ended up after a bit of a stop in the middle of a roundabout! :whistle:

Pic 4 : A collection of Filthy Biker Scum

Pic 5 : The worseterest collection of them all, St John crew!

Pic 6 : And now it's time to say goodbye to all my company!

[gijoe1313]

Well on the trip I did see .. oldguy and yamaha64life and woodybee and ... and ... darn, was that all? :scratch:

[Donor]

Never know... sometimes dreams DO come true...

T'was a great day, and loads of cash raised for the Prostate Cancer Foundation.

Many nice bikes, and a Fiat Ducato that wants to BE a bike.

And now the 1,000ml of black V is slowly wearing off, I think I might toodle on to the kip sack.

Cheers for the company Justin, and of course for the fine write up.

[DIN PELENDA]

Well on the trip I did see .. oldguy and yamaha64life and woodybee and ... and ... darn, was that all? :scratch:

What up "G"
I mis out on this ride yesterday cos I thought it was today :brick: so I fill bit of recession depression cos I need to go for ride , but anyway after reading your report it is like I done it. Thanks gijoe:2thumbsup
And "G" you can ride allot but you can write allot 2, you mast be good in bed 2 :devil2:, thou we booth ride Honda's I don't won't to know:nono:.

Nice one gijoe1313

[gijoe1313]

What up "G"
I mis out on this ride yesterday cos I thought it was today :brick: so I fill bit of recession depression cos I need to go for ride , but anyway after reading your report it is like I done it. Thanks gijoe:2thumbsup
And "G" you can ride allot but you can write allot 2, you mast be good in bed 2 :devil2:, thou we booth ride Honda's I don't won't to know:nono:.

Nice one gijoe1313

Ahh I saw your name on the list! Never mind, always more rides to go on :msn-wink: I remember a time when I was a whole week late to go back to university one year! :o

[Trumpess]

Excellent write up GiJoe.
Definately sounds like every second was worth it!
:first:

[Taz]

Was an excellent ride. My partner who hadn't been on the bike with me for over 10 years came along and we both had a great time. Left the end venue early to go get the kids. We both had crap hands anyway. See you all next year - Andy and Sharon.

[Xaria]

Brilliant write up. Thanks for rescuing Woody Bee. We can't cope at rallies without her as things are far too quiet.

[woodybee]

Meeting Woodybee was the cherry on top

you guys were terrific and meeting up with you gave me the opportunity to have fun and hang out with some very cool dudes, if ever you get to Queenstown, or wherever I end up, my house is your house....Cheers dudes:2thumbsup]