Oopsie, s***t myself on the way home...

[Fatt Max]

Literally actually.....

Now that I have had a few laaaaaarrrrgers, I'm happy to fess up.

So, a few beers and a pizza last night, tad squirty all day if you know what I mean. One of the lads rings up at lunchtime saying he is down the road at a local curry house and would I care to join him for a ruby murray.

"Order me a vindaloo, I'll be there in a jiffy" I say, all happy and glad that a dose of Ghandi's revenge is on the cards.

So, by 2.30pm this arvo, I now have a red hot chook vindy splashing around in my fat tum tum. I do crack a couple of nitro farts whcih made my arse feel like a cross between the Japanses flag and the back end of the Bat Mobile...

3.30pm, I decide I need to squeeze my head in the khazi. To my disappointment I only managed what could only be described as a half eaten scorched almond.....but the guts are churning....

Anyway, 4.00pm I'm on my way home, heading down Abbotts Way minding my own when I hit a bump in the road. Head goes up, arse goes off the seat, back down she goes and....phut.....splaaaaarrrrttt....eeee.....

Yep, gone and dropped a nugget in me undies. Only just make it home in time as well before the whole bally lot of it slips out the legs of my waterproofs

Not a nice story.....so...

Lay off the piss and spicy food, dont have a curry for lunch, adjust your suspension and for f**k sake have a spare cork handy in case you cant squeeze a richard before riding.....

Over to you lot for pisstaking and general ribbing...I'm back on the bevvy...

[tri boy]

Get some diapers ya filthy ol bugga.
(Did it leave a rash)?

[Mully]

Thanks for sharing, I guess.

*walks off, shaking head*

[yod]

spot the pom

[Bren]

Great laugh....Add some Johnny Cash to your Ipod....


(walks away humming Ring of Fire)

[Winter]

Abbotts way is rutted and bumpy as shit. I wish they would hurry up and fix the fucking road! How anyone maintains traction down that hill is beyond me.

</Rant>

I see you let one of the Cosby kids off the bus before Fat Albert pulled the cord.. Nice.

[Laxi]

Thanks for sharing, I guess.

*walks off, shaking head*

wait for me:puke:

[MadDuck]

for f**k sake have a spare cork handy in case you cant squeeze a richard before riding.....

But if your tum tum is as big as you claim...how the hell you going to reach round and shove a cork up your arse :Police:

[FJRider]

Next time ... wait a little longer and go... before you go ...

[FJRider]

But if your tum tum is as big as you claim...how the hell you going to reach round and shove a cork up your arse :Police:

Thats what friends are for ... :innocent:

[sinfull]

Bwahahahaha that vindi would have taken the hairs off the backs of ya legs nicely !

[Bren]

Bwahahahaha that vindi would have taken the hairs off the backs of ya legs nicely !

if its shitty or if it involves a curry you are there eh Bill.....

...Still got that scotch sittin here BTW

[Forest]

Too. Much. Information.

[sinfull]

if its shitty or if it involves a curry you are there eh Bill.....

...Still got that scotch sittin here BTW

RRrrrrr nah, leave that shit for you scotsmen !
Spose to be a club night, but not too friggin keen to go out in this shit !

[Bren]

RRrrrrr nah, leave that shit for you scotsmen !
Spose to be a club night, but not too friggin keen to go out in this shit !

jus hang on there Bill...i'm a frikkin irishman...

least half irish....

...and half redneck

[rosie631]

Too. Much. Information.
Exactly what I was thinking.:eek::eek:

[scumdog]

Thanks for sharing, I guess.

*walks off, shaking head*

As 'e sed.

One can only hope your bike control is a tad better than your sphincter control:eek:

[MadDuck]

I am just waiting for the post from a KBer... "Slid on something brown and smelly on Abbots way on the way home from work"

[YellowDog]

Not a story to get the girls banging your door down for a date.

Good luck for the morning.

Don't forget to put the toilet paper in the fridge before you go to bed.

[6ft5]

Exactly what I was thinking.:eek::eek:

what she said :doh:

[short-circuit]

Still reckon more shit comes out your mouth (or fingers onto keyboard).

Maybe your arse is just trying to catch up

[rosie631]

Not a story to get the girls banging your door down for a date.


Ain't that the truth lol. Altho, we apparently like guys that make us laugh, so he has that going for him.

[blairh]

what she said :doh:

What they both said. hehehe...

[cc rider]

'Colonoscopy. What's all the fuss about." he says. :apint:

[Fatt Max]

Still reckon more shit comes out your mouth (or fingers onto keyboard).

Maybe your arse is just trying to catch up

:niceone:...lol, an excellent observation sir..

[McDuck]

Umm why???

[Fatt Max]

Umm why???

Just thought it was funny really:niceone:

[sels1]

jus hang on there Bill...i'm a frikkin irishman...

least half irish....

...and half redneck

Aha....that explains soo much! :dodge::laugh:

Max's story sounds better if you read it with a Billy Connelly accent

[MSTRS]

But if your tum tum is as big as you claim...how the hell you going to reach round and shove a cork up your arse :Police:

FatMax and Reacharound should not be mentioned together. I have been seriously disturbed by that mental image, you evil woman...

[Oakie]

Ahh FatMax. Your posts are compulsary reading and my heart beats a little faster whenever I see a new thread of yours. Thank you.

[chester]

Still reckon more shit comes out your mouth (or fingers onto keyboard).

Maybe your arse is just trying to catch up

+ 1 :bleh:

[retro asian]

You need a Man-pon!!

[MadDuck]

The quote is .......

[skidMark]

Wanna trade KB names?