Fatt Max
24th May 2009, 21:35
Just having a few cold ones with an old mate of mine who is on his world travels and he has told me this great story from his time in Bangkok.....
So, he is out on the town and meets this really cute local chick in a bar. One thing leads to another and he ends up back at her place. He manages to carry out the 'hairy brain' check and, to his relief, when he lifts up her skirt he is staring at Billy the Beaver rather than the 'Last Turkey in the Shop"...
Anyroad upwards, one night of rude sex later and he has woken up to find all his clothes missing, including his wallet, ipod and iphone.....
'Clucking Bell", he thinks to himself, 'this Thai bird has ripped him right off and left him alone with no money and in the nuddey.
So feck it he thinks, I'm in her bed so I'm going to wreck the joint....and right on cue he feels a rather soggy poop coming on....so, being typically british, he takes a good, hard, splattering crap in her bed, smears it all over the joint and for good measure he has a 'sherman tank' into the bowl of face cream in the bed. Aha, feeling good now after revenge he searches the room for anything resembling clothes he can escape in......
...and at that point, the chick enters the room carrying his clothes, neatly folded and laundered with his wallet fully intact accompanied by his ipod and iphone. Turned out she was exercising the Thai tradition of honouring her guest by looking after his sexual and domestic needs....he, in turn, covered her room in shit and knuckle-shuffled into her Oil of Ulay.
A (very) quick exit into the street and the nearest Tuk Tuk and back to his hotel with little miss Siam effin' and blinding after him.....
Remember, never EVER trust a person you can blindfold with a shoelace....
I'm still laughing at this, my mate is not so impressed with this behaviour.
Brits abroad, eh.......a great tradition
So, he is out on the town and meets this really cute local chick in a bar. One thing leads to another and he ends up back at her place. He manages to carry out the 'hairy brain' check and, to his relief, when he lifts up her skirt he is staring at Billy the Beaver rather than the 'Last Turkey in the Shop"...
Anyroad upwards, one night of rude sex later and he has woken up to find all his clothes missing, including his wallet, ipod and iphone.....
'Clucking Bell", he thinks to himself, 'this Thai bird has ripped him right off and left him alone with no money and in the nuddey.
So feck it he thinks, I'm in her bed so I'm going to wreck the joint....and right on cue he feels a rather soggy poop coming on....so, being typically british, he takes a good, hard, splattering crap in her bed, smears it all over the joint and for good measure he has a 'sherman tank' into the bowl of face cream in the bed. Aha, feeling good now after revenge he searches the room for anything resembling clothes he can escape in......
...and at that point, the chick enters the room carrying his clothes, neatly folded and laundered with his wallet fully intact accompanied by his ipod and iphone. Turned out she was exercising the Thai tradition of honouring her guest by looking after his sexual and domestic needs....he, in turn, covered her room in shit and knuckle-shuffled into her Oil of Ulay.
A (very) quick exit into the street and the nearest Tuk Tuk and back to his hotel with little miss Siam effin' and blinding after him.....
Remember, never EVER trust a person you can blindfold with a shoelace....
I'm still laughing at this, my mate is not so impressed with this behaviour.
Brits abroad, eh.......a great tradition