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		<title>Kiwi Biker forums - Blogs - vifferman</title>
		<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/blog.php/994-vifferman</link>
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			<title>Kiwi Biker forums - Blogs - vifferman</title>
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			<title><![CDATA[Wrapping up the saga: Apparently, I'm now "Really very well".]]></title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1861-Wrapping-up-the-saga-Apparently-I-m-now-quot-Really-very-well-quot</link>
			<pubDate>Sat, 04 Dec 2010 01:42:38 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[At least, that's what the farmer/part-time cardiac surgeon said. He has now "discharged me from his care". I have had all the followup tests (plus a few extra), and so that is basically *it*. My heart is now as normal as it's going to be (permanent arrhythmia and a plastic ring around the valve...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">At least, that's what the farmer/part-time cardiac surgeon said. He has now "discharged me from his care". I have had all the followup tests (plus a few extra), and so that is basically <b>it</b>. My heart is now as normal as it's going to be (permanent arrhythmia and a plastic ring around the valve notwithstanding). Shame my shoulder/arm is still a bit fookt, and I now have dizzy spells my GP and cardiologist (and apparently the renowned dairy farmer/ hobby surgeon) are stumped by.<br />
I guess you can't have everything.<br />
I also guess I really should have asked, "What did you do to my arm while I was unconscious?" but his "Yeah, well that happens sometimes" sort of precluded much discussion about it. I reckon it had something to do with "the power tools". Or maybe not...<br />
After...hmmm.... 5 months of physiotherapy and exercises, my left arm can now move almost as freely as my right, but is a bit weaker, and I currently have more pain than I have had for a long time, and much more often. Sometime it feels like someone is stabbing me through my shoulder with an icy cold stilletto (a very interesting and sometimes not unpleasant sensation). Mostly it just feels very tight and stiff, like the muscles have turned into wood, and very sore.<br />
<br />
I'm not complaining. I've had an interesting experience, my life expectancy's 'normal', and all in all, I'm better off than I was. I may need some plastic surgery, if the lower couple of inches of my 'zipper' doesn't settle down and stop forming kelloidal tissue, but I'm hoping the expensive and smelly restorative cream I'm applying to it will convince it to behave. If not, well.... apparently the plastic surgery's "minor" and I feel my experiences have made me pretty well equipped to handle such trivia.<br />
Oh and despite some determined beer drinking, most of the weight I lost during 13 days in hospital has stayed off. Bonus! :niceone:</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
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			<title>Yeah...</title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1629-Yeah</link>
			<pubDate>Wed, 14 Jul 2010 02:50:32 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Parenthood hasn't turned out like I expected/hoped/planned, and the worst thing is it seems to be getting harder - not easier - as the Three MutantTroglodyteSpawn get older. :blink: Perhaps because the problems get bigger? So even though I've now got 26+ years of parenting under my belt, I'm still...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">Parenthood hasn't turned out like I expected/hoped/planned, and the worst thing is it seems to be getting harder - not easier - as the Three MutantTroglodyteSpawn get older. :blink: Perhaps because the problems get bigger? So even though I've now got 26+ years of parenting under my belt, I'm still learning and trying to cope. Quite honestly, as much as I love my sons, iffen I'd aknown how hard this journey was going to be, I would never have had children. Or maybe just the one...<br />
All I want now is for them to have some measure of contentedness, some sensible ambitions and goals, and some real hope for the future. It seems though that this is just too hard...</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
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			<title>Phark, Recuperation is Boooorrrriiiing!</title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1627-Phark-Recuperation-is-Boooorrrriiiing!</link>
			<pubDate>Tue, 13 Jul 2010 03:32:19 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[The highlights of my day are: 
 
* Getting up and showering 
* Going for a walk (up to about 5km now) 
* Checking email and forums (usually not much there, so it's the work of minutes) 
* Finding some housework to keep me busy. 
 
 
I'm about ready to face the drudgery of work again, just to get...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">The highlights of my day are:<br />
<ul><li style="">Getting up and showering</li><li style="">Going for a walk (up to about 5km now)</li><li style="">Checking email and forums (usually not much there, so it's the work of minutes)</li><li style="">Finding some housework to keep me busy.</li></ul><br />
I'm about ready to face the drudgery of work again, just to get out and have someone to talk to. Unfortunately, the vifferbabe phoned my boss on Monday and gave him an earful, and told him I required <i><b>months</b></i> of recuperation.... Might make turning up next week look a little suss, eh? Plus there's the small matter of how to get there, and can I take a nap at my desk if I get too tired? Must be better'n the boredom of home though...</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
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			<title>Recovering my Mojo</title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1620-Recovering-my-Mojo</link>
			<pubDate>Sun, 04 Jul 2010 21:20:23 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[... is going to take quite some time. 
 
I've lost a lot of condition, and about 6kg of weight, much of which is muscle I put on in the weeks leading up to the operation. Perversely, I was told that fit people often fare worse during major surgery, as they require more anaesthetic and sedatives....]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">... is going to take quite some time.<br />
<br />
I've lost a lot of condition, and about 6kg of weight, much of which is muscle I put on in the weeks leading up to the operation. Perversely, I was told that fit people often fare worse during major surgery, as they require more anaesthetic and sedatives. That was certainly my experience. My recovery should have been better, but all my 'conditioning' seems to have been gobbled up by a couple of weeks of semi-inactivity and reduced diet. Diuretics and other droogz (and frequent blood sampling) probably haven't helped.<br />
<br />
The worst thing (next to my food tasting like crap, making me reluctant to eat), is my left shoulder. I now have great sympathy for people who've busted their collarbone(s), as that's how my shoulder feels. My right arm is pretty much as mobile as before the op, but I can't lift my left arm as high as my shoulder. I guess this is an artefact from having my the left side of my ribcage levered open. :blink: I need to apply a heatpack to it about 5 or 6 times a day to help get it mobile and the maximum doses of paracetamol are largely just to deal with the pain from that and my sternum.<br />
<br />
Last night I had a new and unexpected pain; dunno what it was, but I'm hoping it wasn't anything to do with my kidneys, as it was a sharp stabbing pain in the right lower part of my back. It came on very quickly, was about a '9' on the pain scale, and nothing I could do would make it go away. Eventually I drifted off into a pain-fogged sleep, and when I woke up at 12:46am, it had lessened and I was able to take some more panadol.<br />
<br />
My new bed seems to be working (which is a relief, given the price!) We bought a special mattress with 'memory foam' over latex. Feels really weird, like sleeping on plasticene, but has resulted in no pressure points when I'm lying immobile in one position, so I can sleep for as long as five and half hours at a time, without sleeping tablets (which is convenient as I forgot to get a script for some).<br />
<br />
On the weekend we received the last of some scary bills for the operation. Some of the items were scarily weird, like $115 "for the use of power tools".:shit: I'm now worth more too, as I have $71 worth of stainless-steel wire in my chest, about $1345 in silk sutures, and $1800 for a ring sewn into my heart ("one ring to fix it all"?)<br />
<br />
I have to have daily blood tests for the next few weeks, which is problematic as my arms have track marks a junkie would be ashamed of, and the veins have lots of scar tissue and bruising. My stomach looks like someone has been stabbing me with a syringe loaded with ink, as it has some 'interesting' black dots, courtesy of subcutaneous clixane injections, my least favourite indignity, due to the pain of administration. I have somewhere north of 1000 pills still to take; these include aspirin, warfarin, ferusemide, panadol, mirtazapine, amiodarone, metaprolol, and some others I can't recall. Happily, some have now been discontinued, which is good, as they tasted bad or added to the side-effects. I can't keep track of them all, so the vifferbabe has kindly made a schedule for me on the fridge - I just have to gather up a handful of pills and tick them off on the chart.<br />
<br />
So.<br />
I'm alive, and while I can't say I'm particularly enjoying being alive (mainly because of the pain, weakness, and not looking forward to eating), I'm making progress each day, albeit very slowly. I've almost used up all my leave, and I'm not looking forward to going back to work, partly because my job is very boring, and partly because of the complete lack of contact from anyone in the last three weeks. You'd think given they have my contact details they might have phoned my wife to see if I was still alive, but apparently they don't give a crap. Time to start looking for a new job somewhere, me thinks. :shifty:</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
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			<title>A Tale of Four Wards in One Day</title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1617-A-Tale-of-Four-Wards-in-One-Day</link>
			<pubDate>Sat, 03 Jul 2010 06:10:01 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[...or five, if you count both hospitals, and count my room in Mercy as a ward. 
While the goodly St John's Ambulance people were in transit from wherever, my wife was kept busy checking my pulse, giving me aspirin to chew, and otherwise following instructions/answering questions from the person...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore"><i>...or five, if you count both hospitals, and count my room in Mercy as a ward.</i><br />
While the goodly St John's Ambulance people were in transit from wherever, my wife was kept busy checking my pulse, giving me aspirin to chew, and otherwise following instructions/answering questions from the person inside the phone. However, the ambos arrived with very little delay, and were all efficiency, friendliness, cheerfulness and concern. They bundled both of us into their brand-new vehicle, and while they navigated early-morning traffic, stuck some lines in my hands (well, the one who wasn't driving did).<br />
<br />
There's obviously some rivalry in the medical profession, as within minutes of arriving at North Shore Hospital's emergency department, one of the nurses rubbished the lines the St John's paramedic had put in, and replaced them. Subsequent events would prove the paramedics to be far more professional than some of the other people we dealt with.<br />
<br />
Despite taking all my discharge notes, scripts, etc. with us, and me telling the ED people I was in atrial fibrillation, there was a bit of pissing around and to-and-froing before the ED people got me stabilised and out of a-fib. They then bunged me in an observation room, where I languished (pretty much unobserved) and without food or drink, for nearly 6 hours, eventually going into a-fib again. By then I quite honestly had just about lost the will to live. The registrar had decided I should have a scan, to see what was causing the a-fib (Hello? Try a combination of the heart objecting to being sliced'n'diced - which the surgeon told me was normal, and would probably happen - and being extremely stressed out, with low blood sugar levels and dehydration). During the 6 or so hours, we'd asked questions, talked to various staff, then watched while seemingly hordes of people shuffled papers, wandered around, talked to one another, and did seemingly little to care for patients.<br />
I eventually got up, walked around a bit, and was going to call my surgeon and/or my cardiologist, because despite us telling the ED staff to contact them, I don't think anyone bothered. Professional rivalry and all that? In the end, I was standing by the door, in a very distressed state, about to call my son to come and rescue us, when the registrar turned up. So I told him how pissed off I was, and how appalling my treatment was. <i>Eventually</i>, a bed was found in the short-stay ward, where I was looked after pretty well, and the a-fib stabilised with some intravenous drugs.. <br />
For a few hours.<br />
Then I was wheeled upstairs to Ward 5, where I had to relinquish 'my' brand new bed, and had to hop into an older, crappier one, which I was unable to leave due to the drip in my arm, attached to a pole on the bed as they had no mobile drip stands. I was actually looked after pretty well there too, until they wheeled me off for an uncomfortable (and in my opinion) totally unnecessary ultrasound scan the next morning.<br />
Finally, I was wheeled downstairs (well... via the lifts) into Ward 3, my home for the next 5 or so days.</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
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			<title><![CDATA[It's Great to Be Home (while it lasted...)]]></title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1616-It-s-Great-to-Be-Home-(while-it-lasted-)</link>
			<pubDate>Fri, 02 Jul 2010 23:11:39 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[My wife came and picked up me and my assorted bleongings and paraphernalia (my 'baby' - a cushion to clutch to my chest when coughing, sneezing, farting, or getting in/out of bed; a peak-flow measuring device, and a big bag of droogz), and we headed off home. It was less than a week, but it felt...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">My wife came and picked up me and my assorted bleongings and paraphernalia (my 'baby' - a cushion to clutch to my chest when coughing, sneezing, farting, or getting in/out of bed; a peak-flow measuring device, and a big bag of droogz), and we headed off home. It was less than a week, but it felt very strange and scary to be out'n'about. It was also rather weathery, after being in a climate-controlled environment.<br />
We went for a long trek in the neighbourhood (about 40m left, then back past our house, then 50m the other way, then returned) and I had to wear three layers of clothes, despite the sun and mild temperatures.<br />
My first home-cooked meal was a goodun: it turned out scrambled eggs and salmon (with zero condiments) tasted pretty much like scrambled eggs and salmon.:yes:<br />
Dinner was less successful: blandness being the order of the day, and while this made the meal palatable, and despite the vifferbabe''s best efforts, it wasn't too enjoyable.<br />
<br />
I was pretty tired from my exciting homecoming, and retired to bed early. However, sleep largely eluded me: getting in/out of bed was difficult without the apparatus to tilt, bend, fold and mutilate it. Also, getting comfy was almost impossible. The worst thing was I hadn't asked for a prescription for sleeping tablets, which I'd had to take most nights in hospital. <br />
Actually, that wasn't the worst thing: I'd had another bout of atrial fibrillation, and without a nurse to dose me with drugs, my attempt to sleep it off failed. At 6 the next morning, a tearful vifferman had to concede defeat and call for an ambulance. :blink:<br />
So, by 7 am, after less than a day at home, I was delivered to the Emergency Department of North Shore Hospital.<br />
<br />
Yay....</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
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			<title><![CDATA[I'm Aliiive!]]></title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1615-I-m-Aliiive!</link>
			<pubDate>Fri, 02 Jul 2010 18:45:30 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[When it was time to leave ICU, they made me get up and walk for a bit, to make sure I didn't spring a leak, and to get everything working. This was surprisingly non-traumatic, partly because of morphine tablets, and because it was a snail's-pace walk. I now had a couple of largeish clear plastic...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">When it was time to leave ICU, they made me get up and walk for a bit, to make sure I didn't spring a leak, and to get everything working. This was surprisingly non-traumatic, partly because of morphine tablets, and because it was a snail's-pace walk. I now had a couple of largeish clear plastic tapes on my chest covering the wounds, which allowed me to be showered by the lovely Kai Ming so I didn't reek quite so much of chemicals. My single room had an ensuite, TV on an arm, couple of chairs and a cupboard. Not the flashest hotel I've stayed in, but the service was mostly pretty top-notch, and the remote-controlled bed (and more droogz) helped me get some sleep, not easy when I was confined to lying immobile on my back (and will be for the next couple of months).<br />
The day after leaving ICU, it was time to climb up/down two flights of stairs. This too was surprisingly easy, and reassuring, as we have a three-storey house.<br />
Meanwhile, despite the diuretic and other drugs, my weight continued for a few days to be on the high side, due to fluid retention. A new and alarming problem (to me) was atrial fibrillation, a not uncommon post-heart surgery effect. This is where instead of the chambers of the heart pumping rhythmically and systematically, the normal rhythm is joined by spasms in the heart, and the pulse rate races a little. In  my case, it got up to something like 170 at one stage. The feeling is like a fluttering in your chest at first, which then feels like running your bike with the sparkplug leads on the wrong cylinders. Luckily, I was connected to a wireless telemetry device, which broadcast a constant ECG to the nurses' station. I was given some drugs to settle this down, which apart from another couple of episodes, they did.<br />
The last couple of days were pretty sweet, apart from one further a-fib episode: I had a new room which got some sun, overlooked the harbour, and had a balcony with a picnic table and chairs. I got whatever I asked for (and promptly), a newspaper was delivered every day, and life seemed not so bad (apart from the food tasting like crap, due to my drug-addled senses.)<br />
On the Wednesday following surgery (Friday18th), I decided I'd had enough of being a patient, and wanted to feel like a person again, so I got up, shaved (a mammoth task), showered, and put on some clothes. On my walk around the hospital, I met my surgeon at the nurses' station. "You want to go home?" So, a mere five days after surgery, I did.:yes:</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
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			<title>Drug-addledness: The Flipside</title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1614-Drug-addledness-The-Flipside</link>
			<pubDate>Fri, 02 Jul 2010 01:21:51 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Apart from the nausea induced by mainlining morphine (I had a "central line" in my jugular, which also I think also carried wires to my heart to kickstart it if my battery went flat), the morphine, sedatives, and myriad of other chemical cocktails I was on had other tricks up their non-existent...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">Apart from the nausea induced by mainlining morphine (I had a "central line" in my jugular, which also I think also carried wires to my heart to kickstart it if my battery went flat), the morphine, sedatives, and myriad of other chemical cocktails I was on had other tricks up their non-existent sleeves. <br />
Hallucinations.<br />
Farkingwithmysenses. :blink:<br />
These will be with me for up to three months.:gob:<br />
It started with seeing writing on the (not very interesting) hospital ceilings, and seeing little glowing creatures like oscilloscope traces zipping about on the periphery of my vision. (Personally, I think these are real, and the drooogz have allowed me to see into another dimension. I reckon they're actually angels. :innocent: )<br />
Another side-effect was my sense of smell became a super-sense of smell, and I became aware of how much I reeked from the chemicals seeping out of my skin. This also affected how food tasted, as did the scrambled taste-buds. Anything with even a smidgeon of salt tasted like it was flavoured with seawater, anything sweet tasted sour, anything sour tasted metallic, and anything with complex tastes (like a grape) just completely did my head in.<br />
I learned to cope with this by ordering the most bland things I could: rice with no salt, porridge with no salt or sugar, toast with no spreads, etc. Even so, I had to really steel my resolve and just eat things so I didn't lose weight and strength. I'm starting to add things: unsalted eggs, salmon, some nuts, etc. are palatable, as is decaf coffee (yay!) but the basic food groups like chocolate, beer, wine, etc. are still off limits.<br />
<br />
As for weight: gaining fluid is a problem, so I'm on a diuretic. I gained nearly 6kg in water at one point, and "my hands felt just like two balloons", so I couldn't bend my fingers. Now I'm currently ~5kg lighter than before the op, probably mostly muscle (I still have love handles). The diuretics are still being taken though, as there is a build-up of fluid around my heart (in the pericardium).<br />
<br />
The last two effects of my chemical binge are feeling crappy and having weird nightmares. Hopefully, the "up to three months" effect will be shorterer.</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
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			<title>The Wonderful World of Drug-Addledness</title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1613-The-Wonderful-World-of-Drug-Addledness</link>
			<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jul 2010 21:17:30 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[After the slicing'n'dicing, I spent some hours in ICU in a drug-induced coma, with a machine doing the breathing for me. I don't remember this bit at all, but my wife and #2MutantSpawn came to visit me, and viewed the antics that ensued when I was fighting for domination over the respirator to see...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">After the slicing'n'dicing, I spent some hours in ICU in a drug-induced coma, with a machine doing the breathing for me. I don't remember this bit at all, but my wife and #2MutantSpawn came to visit me, and viewed the antics that ensued when I was fighting for domination over the respirator to see who would do the breathing bit. Once the tubes were out, I was apparently talking (probably complete and utter shite and interacting with the nurses. I do remember the period after this, when I was doped up to the eyeballs and beyond on morphine (mmmmm... morphiiinnne..:love:) The things that stand out are the thirst, and the nausea; the morphine made me thirsty, the thirst made me drink the water I was supposed to be rinsing my mouth with, and more than about 100ml of water in my stomach made me immediately vomit. The one thing that I really remember well is the care and compassion I felt from the fantastic ICU nurses: Graham, Wendy and Yvonne. They did a fantastic job of calming me down, easing my pain, and soothing my jagged nerves. (Sorry for vomiting on you, Wendy:shutup::sick:)<br />
Yvonne had the brilliant idea of getting some ginger ale from somewhere; this solved the thirst/nausea issue. The ginger killed the nausea, and while the softdrink made me even thirstier, it was enough for me to sip that, and just rinse my mouth with water before spitting it out.<br />
I was in ICU and drug-addledness for Friday afternoon and Saturday morning. Before I left ICU there was one more scary bonus: removing the drain tubes from my chest. Yvonne got me to practice looking at her intently while breathing in and out, then once I had this down, she snipped the stitches, I took a breath in and she skillfully (and painfully, despite the morphine), whipped tube one out. A moment's recovery then repeat for #2. :shit:</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
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			<title>The Wonderful World of Pain</title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1611-The-Wonderful-World-of-Pain</link>
			<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jul 2010 05:48:22 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[So anyway, after the "lawnmow the vifferman's bits derby", I was evidently wheeled into theatre,and the anaesthetist and perfusionist conspired between themselves to try and balance me just neatly on the very thin edge between being dead and alive, using temperature, weird chemicals, machines that...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">So anyway, after the "lawnmow the vifferman's bits derby", I was evidently wheeled into theatre,and the anaesthetist and perfusionist conspired between themselves to try and balance me just neatly on the very thin edge between being dead and alive, using temperature, weird chemicals, machines that go "Beep!" and more'n likely a few arcane and black arts.This achieved, they stopped my heart going "pah-Dump!...swish...pah-Dump!" Then the eminiently skilled and highly paid (when I send him his cheque) surgeon cut into my chest with scalpel and shears, before levering my ribs asunder. The leftward side of the heart was then opened up, and the naughty valve was cut, stitched, and a ring added around the outside to keep it in shape. Oooer...:blink:<br />
<br />
Eventually, they put it all back together, lacing the sternum back together with twists of stainless steel wire, and got an ex-owner of a Yamaha RT360 to kick-start me back into life (being a rider of Vespas only, the perfusionist wasn't up to it).<br />
<br />
OK - I lied; there wasn't much pain here, but there was some in the scary narrow bits between morphine does and consciousness. You'll have to wait - all this fond reminiscing is making my sternum hurt.</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1611-The-Wonderful-World-of-Pain</guid>
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			<title><![CDATA[Sorry, Biatches - I'm still alive.]]></title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1610-Sorry-Biatches-I-m-still-alive</link>
			<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jul 2010 01:07:59 GMT</pubDate>
			<description>:blink: 
 
Well. What a saga that turned out to be. :shit: 
Was admitted to Mercy hospitule in Remuera on Thursday 17th. Had the weirdest experience of my life when two of the lovely nurses tag-teamed shaved me like a weasel. I almost laughed it was so weird, especially with two batter-powered...</description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">:blink:<br />
<br />
Well. What a saga that turned out to be. :shit:<br />
Was admitted to Mercy hospitule in Remuera on Thursday 17th. Had the weirdest experience of my life when two of the lovely nurses tag-teamed shaved me like a weasel. I almost laughed it was so weird, especially with two batter-powered lawnmowers vrooming up and down. Then nurse #3 decided the other two were on crack or summat, tut-tutted, and had another go. So I ended up with a bald head (genes), a brazillion, bald arms between wrists and elbows, and a bald  abdomen. Not what I would consider fashionable.<br />
<br />
Next day, I was starved, washed myself all over with antiseptic soap three times (to go with the two the previous night) and left lying around in a sexy nightie. Eventually they gave me some pills and wheeled me off to Pre-Op. While lazing around there, I started to join in on the nurses' conversations, which after a while prompted a "WTF? What'ya doing talking?!! You're supposed to be asleep!:shit:<br />
"Not my fault, dudes...":innocent:<br />
<i>Eventually</i>, they musta sorted me, because there was a Big Blank Bit, which morphed into The Wonderful World of Pain.</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1610-Sorry-Biatches-I-m-still-alive</guid>
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			<title>Not quite dead yet..</title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1590-Not-quite-dead-yet</link>
			<pubDate>Wed, 16 Jun 2010 05:59:08 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[... so for those of you who wish I'd hurry up, you'll have to wait a weee bit longer. I'm being admitted tomorrow, and <s>desecrated</s> <s>decimated</s> sliced'n'diced on Friday. A day in ICU, then back into my hotel room, where I'll have lotsa time (a week?) to read bike mags. 
 
If I had...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">... so for those of you who wish I'd hurry up, you'll have to wait a weee bit longer. I'm being admitted tomorrow, and <s>desecrated</s> <s>decimated</s> sliced'n'diced on Friday. A day in ICU, then back into my hotel room, where I'll have lotsa time (a week?) to read bike mags.<br />
<br />
If I had any...:blink:</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1590-Not-quite-dead-yet</guid>
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			<title>All Systems Go!</title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1582-All-Systems-Go!</link>
			<pubDate>Thu, 10 Jun 2010 06:27:22 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[For anyone that is still the remotest bit interested in this drawn-out saga, I've had the final stuff done (x-rays and full blood workup). The surgeon's office contacted me today, and it looks like I'm into the workshop either next Friday or the following Thursday for the oil pump...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">For anyone that is still the remotest bit interested in this drawn-out saga, I've had the final stuff done (x-rays and full blood workup). The surgeon's office contacted me today, and it looks like I'm into the workshop either next Friday or the following Thursday for the oil pump reconditioning.:blink:<br />
(Actually, I have to go in the night before, so they can charge me another $445 +GST for the hotel room for the night).<br />
Apparently the valves repairable, but they'll have a replacement bionic one on hand in case the surgeon fuxitup. I hope not - that's another $4000, plus I'll have to use synthetic oil for the rest of my life. Plus it'll be clattery and keep the vifferbabe awake at night, with it's constant ticking, a la the clock inside Cap'n Hook's crocodile...<br />
<br />
Now all I have to do is come up with a big wodge of cash :blink:</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
			<guid isPermaLink="true">https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1582-All-Systems-Go!</guid>
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			<title><![CDATA[That's the TOE done. Next: the big slice'n'dice]]></title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1541-That-s-the-TOE-done-Next-the-big-slice-n-dice</link>
			<pubDate>Fri, 14 May 2010 00:05:10 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[Had  the Transoesophageal Echo (TOE) this morning, at North Shore Hospital. I was frankly surprised at the difference between the two hospitals (the last procedure was at Mercy Ascot). While everyone was kind and seemed proficient, they were less organised. The nurse couldn't get the shunt in my...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">Had  the Transoesophageal Echo (TOE) this morning, at North Shore Hospital. I was frankly surprised at the difference between the two hospitals (the last procedure was at Mercy Ascot). While everyone was kind and seemed proficient, they were less organised. The nurse couldn't get the shunt in my hand, and had to have another go with a fresh needle in my arm. Meanwhile, I was having trouble not fainting (partly whimpishness, partly a factor of the fault mitral valve), Eventually, it was all go.<br />
When I was in theatre, there was a mini-conference about whether the appratus in there was the faulty one or not, so they started to change it, and someone else came in and said, "What's going on?" The technician explained they were using the old TOE probe as the new one was broken. "No, it's fine - I tested it myself yesterday!" So, they verified this and set it up again.<br />
The pre-op throat spray was most unpleasant: the tongue depressor made me gag, and the spray was rotten-banana flavoured organic solvents (well... that's what it tasted like).:sick: More tongue depressor/gagging, then more rotten bananas, then in with the TOE thingo. Much fatter'n I expected - about as thick as my little finger, with a fatter bit on the end. Yeah right! Swallow that? Doesn't look remotely like food!:shit:<br />
A little more gagging, and down she goes. Much discussion and mucking about, pix taken, blah blah blah. The doctor's opinion was the valve was repairable, so that's good.<br />
I don't think the throat-numbing poison or the sedative were that effective, as my throat was rather sore the whole time, and I was able to swallow immediately afterwards, whereas it's supposed to take ages to wear off.<br />
They walked me outside of the room, plonked me in a chair, got my wife, and abandoned me for a while. Eventually they sorted me out, and took the shunt out, and gave me a cup of water (presumable to watch me dribble it everywhere), but like I said, swallowing was no problem (apart from the discomfort). Get this: when they took the shunt out, the nurse put some gauze on my arm. I asked her if it needed a plaster on it. "I don't know. Anyway, I don't think I have any..."<br />
So, I put my clothes back on, finding the three electrodes she missed, and off I went. <br />
Apart from the seeming disorganisation and shortage of staff, the cockup with the shunt, and crowded facilities c.f. the private sector, it was not too bad. Oh yeah - and my sore throat.<br />
I feel a bit drowsy now (a couple of hours later), so I'm off for a wee lie  down...<br />
The Next Exciting Chapter:  Into the workshop for an engine teardown, and a new seal for the oil pump.</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
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			<title>Into hospital tomorrow</title>
			<link>https://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/entry.php/1534-Into-hospital-tomorrow</link>
			<pubDate>Thu, 06 May 2010 05:43:16 GMT</pubDate>
			<description><![CDATA[I'm having an angiogram done tomorrow (yay! A day off work :niceone: ) then next Friday, I've got a transoesophageal echo scheduled (yay!! Another day off work!). 
The problem occupying my mind today was what music to take with me... if I take a favourite CD, will I hate it afterwards? :confused:...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote class="blogcontent restore">I'm having an angiogram done tomorrow (yay! A day off work :niceone: ) then next Friday, I've got a transoesophageal echo scheduled (yay!! Another day off work!).<br />
The problem occupying my mind today was what music to take with me... if I take a favourite CD, will I hate it afterwards? :confused:<br />
If I take something weird, like Modest Mouse, will it freak the people sticking things in/up me out, and make them stuff it up?<br />
Would "Master of Puppets" or "Death Magnetic" make everyone aggro?<br />
Decisions, decisions....<br />
I think I'll stick with something cruisy, like David Gilmour's "On an Island", or "Everything That Happens Will Happen Today", by David Byrne and Brian Eno. Play it safe, eh?</blockquote>

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			<dc:creator>vifferman</dc:creator>
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