gijoe1313's Blogs

Yet again my fine person of quality that peruses the personal volumes of memoirs that make up the stock within KiwiBiker, I bid you welcome and I hope you are well rested. I find the time to wax lyrical on my rides and I do so appreciate the time and effort that you deign to actually dabble on my diadems of biking discernment.

This day once again found me at odd sorts, I had already commenced a full day of housebound chores involving the clearance of unwanted vegetative matter from the home gardens, replanting of some splendid oak leaf lettuce and other assorted fancy lettuces, watered the growing crops of corn, beans and the sprinkling of squash. Blueberries and other fecund flora expectant with the burgeoning windfall of produce to come.

Also, a maintenance was conducted on the various rods, reels and tackle that make up my pater’s extensive fishing paraphernalia, missing screws, lube and the replacement of line was undertaken to ensure optimum performance when it comes to landing a fine few fishy friends for dinner. My lil’ol’hornet provided sterling short journey service to visit a few of the local businesses to source parts for said reels. I was a bit underwhelmed by the lackadasicial attitude of the local fishing supply outlet, they denigrated my pater’s most excellent Butterworth reel by calling it “Butterworthless”, they also had no idea of customer service and said such reels were “scrap”. Now as an aside, they could easily have held my custom by being positive in their effusion about a dearly cherished piece of equipment.

They could have upsold me on a new reel, even a package deal for a reel and a rod! It is not as if I am without means and I was in the mood to actually purchase something for my dearest pater as acknowledgement of his paternal care and attention to my development as a man. It disappoints me to say that I got much more engaging service from a local engineering shop who could not do enough to try and find a solution to my real reel problems. But I digress my reader and I do accept your chiding, back to the sole purpose of this site … biking!

I was contacted by CaptainBanzai about a little problem on his stator, namely the lack of an impact driver - of course I agreed to help and on his arrival discovered my impact driver was no where to be located. Bugger, gremlin in the system already! Never mind, I drove with him to my brother's place and purloined his impact driver, with that done, the job was completed in short time and to a successful conclusion! With a quick natter, we both went on our respective ways.

My how time flies, it was late towards the afternoon that I donned my helmet, zipped up my jacket and pointed my Big Ol’Hornet’s tyres to the hills. A revisit to the Hunuas from the previous day was altered towards the Mercer side of the hills, down through to the quaint bridge near the entrance to Port Waikato saw me not take that opton and I carried through into the back roads of all that is good about the Southern riding route. Just a quick little tour through the backblocks of Bombay before alighting back at home with the minimum of moronway travel completed my day.

On return to home I found that the tremulous appearance of Gremlin on MSN somehow found yours truly packing a plethora of tools to sort out his KTM (dearly known as Katie), at the secret batcave of Zapf and Gremlin I bantered usual insults about parentage and sexual orientation and was also treated to the amusing view of Zapf and Gremlin engaging in WWF antics, I managed to locate the problem to Katie’s perchance to wobble her tailpiece in a most indelicate way.

Now for some quick background, Gremlin is a most unique individual, his name sake seems to suit the vortex of weird happenings that encircle him like a pentagram. Gremlin by name, gremlin by nature is the appellation and it is doubly true. Ride with him one day and see what happens! I have given fair warning!

Anyhow, Gremlin’s enthusiasm for utilising a KTM in the way it is advertised leads to disconcerting periods of downtime due to the demanding and robust way he rides. In this case, I had stripped off the hard GIVI rack and dismantled the rear tail pieces to discover that metal fatigue had destroyed the back brace to Katie. Oh, well done Mr Gremlin, why am I not surprised? Missing bolts and his exhaust showing signs of being worn through by missing packing rubber rounds out the list of unique damage only Gremlin can inflict on his wild, wanton hussy of a bike.

So with my usual derision and shake of the head, I left Gremlin alone to his broken down Katie (again). For me, biking, spannering and getting to insult gremlin really did warm the cockles of my biking heart. I rounded the evening off by heading to my dear maters and paters shop again to assist with the closing down routine.

Mission successful in each and every way.

Gosh, I do so like being a biker in my life!

Your ever incumbent notary of life
gijoe1313