Practical guide to buying a house?

[Big Dave]

Biscuits - You iz not a stupid person. Clumsy maybe.
Just go and find a bakery you like, and can afford, and buy the fuckin' thing.

[skidMark]

Get a perm first, the rest will figure itself out.

[HenryDorsetCase]

Where do private sellers advertise? Or did you do a sneaky approach-the-owners-when-the-agents-not-looking ruse...

any vendor who has signed with an agent and tries to back-door them like that will get hammered. As a buyer its not your problem.

One thing I need to mention here. For years there has been a "Standard form" for real estate sales. It was jointly developed by the Law Society and the Real Estate institute, and most agents could understand it some of the time, and all lawyers could understand it all the time.

The Real Estate Institute has decided to say "Fuck you" to the Law Society form and develop its own. Very limited input from lawyers, and only a few lawyers have seen it. The problem is that we go from a situation where all that "Fine print" (technically the General Terms of Sale, clauses 1-14) provide a known, court tested, and reasonable set of expectations regarding who will do what, vendor warranties regarding title, boundaries, chattels, who does what if settlement is late, etc etc, to one where potentially none of that is set out. You would NOT want to be the test case as to what clause X in the new agreement actually meant.

My advice. If the contract you are asked to sign is NOT headed "Agreement for Sale and Purchase of Real Estate Eighth Edition (2) then a purchaser would be very wise to include a clause along the lines of "This agreement is subject to approval as to form AND CONTENT by the Purchaser's solicitor, within 10 working days of the date of this Agreement." (make it the same number of days as your title, LIM, finance and building inspection clauses. < Oh, and yes I totally recommend you insert those clauses).

Just a heads up. No charge.

[HenryDorsetCase]

you guys have got it all wrong. Here's what you do...

1. Find a house, any house and get a dodgy valuer to give it a value 10 - 20% more than it's worth

2. Negotiate hard and buy the house at a good price. Make sure loan is interest only.

3. Claim back the gst on the purchase

4. Rent it out.

5. Use the over valued equity for the next house.

6. Repeat steps 1 - 5 as many times as you can.

7. Buy a ferrari.

The worse than can happen is the market turns on you and the banks call the mortgages. Because you've set up a complex set of trusts and a good accountant, you'll walk away with some assets and cash. If you're unlucky, you may be bankrupted. No problem, just set up a dodgy mate as an executor of the trust and repeat steps 1 - 5 again.

bahahahahahahaaha

so so true.


and YOU WILL NEVER GET A CHEAPER FERRARI THAN NOW. Just saying.

theres even a DB7 Aston on tardme for $60 large!!! cheap as chips au!

[skidMark]

bahahahahahahaaha

so so true.


and YOU WILL NEVER GET A CHEAPER FERRARI THAN NOW. Just saying.

theres even a DB7 Aston on tardme for $60 large!!! cheap as chips au!

Yep 93 ferrari at the dealer in newmarket 99k...

WANT

[Winston001]

the real estate institute has decided to say "fuck you" to the law society form....

witches witches burn them burn them all

[Finn]

and YOU WILL NEVER GET A CHEAPER FERRARI THAN NOW. Just saying.

theres even a DB7 Aston on tardme for $60 large!!! cheap as chips au!

And it'll cost you another $60k per year to keep the shitter going. Besides, its a 3.2L 6 cylinder Aston. Should never have been manufactured.

Yep 93 ferrari at the dealer in newmarket 99k...

WANT

There are many other cars that would be faster and more fun for $99k than an old shitter like this. Unfortunately, the only good Ferrari is a new one. Then they are VERY good.

[retro asian]

Which is the main factor putting me off... All these people who bought for capital gain and are hanging on in the belief they should get what they damn well deserve because they read some self esteem book and watched property climbers on tv and like to finger their pet chihuahua while driving to the mall.....

Most of the negative reports on the "housing market" are from economists. Most of the rosey positive ones are from the real estate profession or property investors.

Hmmmmmm......

Hahaha

Auckland needs more houses:
http://www.stuff.co.nz/business/pers...ds-more-houses

[Big Dave]

And it'll cost you another $60k per year to keep the shitter going.

That only makes him $119,990 short.

[HenryDorsetCase]

That only makes him $119,990 short.

60 +60 +119990 = $239990 = AM Vanquish?

I like the V8 Vantage: White with black wheels and interior please.

and I am short so the "high seat" option gets a tick. Oh, and the "willy extender" as well. If I'm talking the talk, I better be able to walk the walk.... right?

[Big Dave]

60 +60 +119990 = $239990 = AM Vanquish?

I like the V8 Vantage: White with black wheels and interior please.

and I am short so the "high seat" option gets a tick. Oh, and the "willy extender" as well. If I'm talking the talk, I better be able to walk the walk.... right?

I meant Skiddy. Was 60 short plus the...whatever.

I can't get into any Aston Martin...actually that's not right - I can get in OK - getting out again is pure Keystone cops.