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Thread: Low Slung Jeans - a review by AllanB

  1. #1
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    Low Slung Jeans - a review by AllanB

    Low slung Jeans

    Also known as ‘hipster jeans’. At first when hearing this ‘hipster’ name I automatically presumed it was a new Harley Davidson model and jumped on the net looking for pictures. Alas it was not, and I should have known this, as if it was a HD it would surely have been a Hipster FXDZCR.

    Actually ‘hipster’ would be a good name for a very low slung cruiser.

    Back to the denim, although HD does paint a few bikes in a matt paint they referred to as ‘denim’. I always though that a tank painted in denim could have a handy pocket on either side for your wallet and whatnots just like a pair of jeans.

    Hipster Jeans. Now these are not the jeans that hang down between your knees so half of your buttocks are exposed to the world. Not sir these are like Rock Star jeans, or even gunslinger jeans if you prefer.

    They ride low on the hips, yet snuggle the scrotum (or pubic area in gals) in a warm supporting envelope of denim.

    Mrs B recently purchased me a new pair of hipster jeans.

    Yeah at my age (mid 40’s) I am quite capable of buying my own jeans. However she is aware of my aversion to going into clothing shops. I find it somewhat disturbing being served by a girl young enough to be my daughter who tells be “you’ll look great in this…” . At my age I am not yet old enough to be 'old-man-sexy' to these young things, so I presume it is just a sales pitch. I am unsure what else these staff members sell as usually there is a generous amount of boobage exposed to their customers.

    Yet I have no issue with buying motorcycle related clothing. Must be a man thing.

    I have been wearing these hipster jeans for a bit now and overall I am very happy with the fit and style.

    However.

    There is one issue I feel compelled to point out to other KB males considering purchasing a pair, or indeed for you fine KB ladies looking to drag your males out of those high wasted 1980’s jeans. Flash-dance memories anyone?

    Being low-slung the distance between the top of the jeans to the lower crutch is rather short and the zip of the fly is correspondingly short. Consequently when one comes to having to urinate there is very little of an opening to extract ones male member from.

    As a result I have developed a technique of unfolding my urinating device, or when really in a hurry I find I actually have to unbutton and unzip otherwise it is akin to unfolding a full pressure garden hose that has a bend in it.

    I trust my review is of help to any males considering purchasing such jeans as these things are ‘good to know”

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    Whenever people mention hipster or low slung, I always think of this shot:



    Not you, is it?
    Quote Originally Posted by Jane Omorogbe from UK MSN on the KTM990SM
    It's barking mad and if it doesn't turn you into a complete loon within half an hour of cocking a leg over the lofty 875mm seat height, I'll eat my Arai.

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    I buy my jeans from the warehouse.

    They cost $20 a pair

    as far as I know they are called jeans

    and the style is jeans

    The fit is also jeans

    My review

    They reach my shoes and have pockets.

    I have two pairs, 1 black pair, and 1 blue pair.

    They are both work jeans, and going out jeans. They also go with everything I own, and never ever need washing.

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    i like pants
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gremlin View Post

    Not you, is it?

    Hell if it is, i'd tap that.


    [QUOTE=Headbanger;1129325401]

    I have two pairs, 1 black pair, and 1 blue pair.

    QUOTE]

    Thats nothing unusal for wangas is it?.
    Harley Davidson: The most efficient way to convert gasoline into noise without the side effects of horsepower.

    'Fast' Harleys are only fast compared to stock Harleys.

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    Quote Originally Posted by nallac View Post

    Thats nothing unusual for wangas is it?.
    Wanganui is like that Island on Lost, Fucked up shit happens constantly, and everyone just carries on.

    Been seeing lots of females down the shopping centre in their pj's.

    Now thats fucked up.

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    Why have jeans you cannot pull your twanger out of?
    Quote Originally Posted by Paul in NZ View Post
    Ha...Thats true but life is full horrible choices sometimes Merv. Then sometimes just plain stuff happens... and then some more stuff happens.....




    Alloy, stainless and Ti polishing.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gremlin View Post
    Whenever people mention hipster or low slung, I always think of this shot:



    Not you, is it?
    Although I am a Honda ride - no such luck. If I had a arse like that, I'd give up work and spend all day rubbing baby lotion into it

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    Quote Originally Posted by ducatilover View Post
    Why have jeans you cannot pull your twanger out of?
    Well Mrs B did purchase them for me ..............

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    Quote Originally Posted by AllanB View Post
    Well Mrs B did purchase them for me ..............
    Is she suggesting you have a small wing wang or that you are a dirty man and shouldn't chase her so much with that mutton dagger?
    Quote Originally Posted by Paul in NZ View Post
    Ha...Thats true but life is full horrible choices sometimes Merv. Then sometimes just plain stuff happens... and then some more stuff happens.....




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    Quote Originally Posted by ducatilover View Post
    Is she suggesting you have a small wing wang or that you are a dirty man and shouldn't chase her so much with that mutton dagger?

    I'm definitely going with the latter on that one - pictures as soon as I unfold it from these darn hipster jeans

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    Quote Originally Posted by AllanB View Post
    I'm definitely going with the latter on that one - pictures as soon as I unfold it from these darn hipster jeans
    Well I approve of that, perhaps not the pictures Do you make her wear them and show how silly they are?
    Quote Originally Posted by Paul in NZ View Post
    Ha...Thats true but life is full horrible choices sometimes Merv. Then sometimes just plain stuff happens... and then some more stuff happens.....




    Alloy, stainless and Ti polishing.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Headbanger View Post
    Wanganui is like that Island on Lost, Fucked up shit happens constantly, and everyone just carries on.

    Been seeing lots of females down the shopping centre in their pj's.

    Now thats fucked up.
    You should try Avondale. Seems to be the thing for young, overweight women to wear PJs, a hoodie and ugg boots. I am sooo living in the wrong suburb.

    As for hipster jeans, didn't your Grandma tell you you'll get a chill in your kidneys if you wear low jeans like that?
    There is no such thing as bad weather; only inappropriate clothing!

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    Quote Originally Posted by klingon View Post
    As for hipster jeans, didn't your Grandma tell you you'll get a chill in your kidneys if you wear low jeans like that?
    I better give all those cute young ladies hugs, so that they don't get cold!!
    Quote Originally Posted by Jane Omorogbe from UK MSN on the KTM990SM
    It's barking mad and if it doesn't turn you into a complete loon within half an hour of cocking a leg over the lofty 875mm seat height, I'll eat my Arai.

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    Quote Originally Posted by avgas View Post
    i like pants
    Pants optional!
    To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and to endure the betrayal of false friends. To appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know that even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded

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