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Thread: Most embarrassing moments?

  1. #1
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    20th July 2009 - 14:30
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    Most embarrassing moments?

    Name one of those times you were so embarrased you wanted to just temporarily die.
    One of mine was probably when my dad jumped on the computer and found that I was searching 'massage parlours' in the white pages
    Thats whats up.

  2. #2
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    There was the time I forgot to lock the door of the B767 toilet I was using.

    (Just standing...)
    Measure once, cut twice. Practice makes perfect.

  3. #3
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    This one time I accidentally the whole thing.
    Woe to You Oh Earth and Sea
    For the Devil sends the beast with wrath
    Because he knows the time is short
    Let him who hath understanding
    Reckon the number of the beast
    For it is a human number
    Its number is six hundred and sixty six.


    FOR SALE: '88 Yamaha FZX 750, low k's and decent condition. Looking for around 4.5K. Drop us a pm, view it any time. Oh, and trades considered for cruisers or naked sporties.

  4. #4
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    Years ago on tv there was this neat add for a video game or so this 8 year old thought,mum and dad had guests,I asked mum what's VD(was vd add risque at time),she said what ,I replied it's in tv,she said oh video game,amongst laughing from the table.
    Hello officer put it on my tab

    Don't steal the government hates competition.

  5. #5
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    doing a STMS course, in a conference room with 20 others. sucked on a lollie and in when down the wrong way made me start a coughing fit which ended up with me pukeing on the table in front of me with on lookers pissing themselves
    'Good things come to those who wait'
    Bollocks, get of your arse and go get it

  6. #6
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    25th March 2007 - 12:04
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    P.E in fourth form, we were doing a 12 minute run and we were all sitting on the grass in a semi-circle listening to the teacher as she debriefed us in regards to her expectations of us.

    Before I could clench my arse cheeks together to stop the frequency actuated rectal tremor escape...................
    "BRROOOOWRROWWRRROOOOOOOOWWMMP!!!" I could not believe that that had come out of my own arse, there was not even a hint, no tremors, murmurs or rumblings prior to that 7.4 on the Rectum scale!

    It sent seismic ripples across the field and all the girls sitting next to me scattered and experienced momentary hearing loss.

    My teacher turned to me with a smirk on her face.....and once the larfing hyenas had settled she said......
    "You may want to save some of that, to give you a turbo boost when you go for your run Tina"

    I just wanted to die!
    No body move... I dropped my brain

  7. #7
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    The most embarrassing?.......Easy. Will never forget it.

    At the age of about 15, I was rubbing one off to a stick mag.

    You guessed it, the old lady just burst into the room.......

    There was the awkward silence, and i'd made a feeble attempt to hide the porn which was sticking out from behind my head very visibly.

    As I sat there looking like Ace Ventura in the grass hut, to my horror she tried to cover up what we both new had been going on, by sticking around and telling me off as she had obviously originally planned to, for getting up so late in the day......!

    I think she must have stayed in there for a full 5 mins....It felt like an eternity. I could'nt look her in the eye for a week!
    Had it been the old man he'd have told me to hurry up and high tailed it outta there!

    Why are mums so bad at this kinda thing?

    Do teenage girls ever get walked in on by dad while flicking the bean?Or is it just an unfortunate guy thing?

    Word to you mums, if you walk in on your son having a thrash, get the fuck out!
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  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stirts View Post
    Before I could clench my arse cheeks together to stop the frequency actuated rectal tremor escape...................
    "BRROOOOWRROWWRRROOOOOOOOWWMMP!!!" I could not believe that that had come out of my own arse, there was not even a hint, no tremors, murmurs or rumblings prior to that 7.4 on the Rectum scale!
    So you not only have brain farts then? OK seeing as I have passed comment I guess I'll have to share mine then.....

    Years ago I used to go out with a girl who was an exotic dancer (OK a stripper), I went to visit her at work. She told me she had always wanted to do the wild thing in the changing room out back. So she went and made sure we weren't going to get walked in on and lead me out back just a bit before she was going to go on stage so we had an excuse to be there. It all went well and after we'd finished she heard her name being announced as the next dancer so she went out, I made my exit out the door back into the bar which was right next to the stage.

    I heard Scott the DJ announce "here comes (name withheld)" and at that moment he flicked a spot light on to me walking away from the door tucking myself in "and here's her boyfriend Mark doing up his jeans, and what have you been up to?". Someone had dobbed us in.

    We both got a loud round of applause. I had to take my hat off (among other things)to my girl, she just laughed and carried on with what she was supposed to be doing. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me.

    Plus side I got guys buying me drinks all night and slappin me on the back for havin a hot girlie and hittin it out back. Her boss wasn't so and made me promise not to entertain that idea again.
    Exert your talents, and distinguish yourself, and don't think of retiring from the world, until the world will be sorry that you retire. -Samuel Johnson


  9. #9
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    Probably not my most embarrassing moment (there have been more than a few ), but a bike-related one. About 5 years ago, 4 of us had been to the Paeroa races with our wives on the back and planned to stop for a cold one at the Okoroire Pub on the way home.

    Anyway, let us just say that shortly before arriving at Okoroire, our speed had apparently greatly displeased the speed regulators on the back. We dismounted and de-helmeted in front of the pub which was packed with bikers and our wives proceeded to tear strips off us and not bother to keep their voices down . This monster bollocking was accompanied by enthusiastic cheering and applause from the front deck of the pub whilst we just shuffled about and looked at our feet. Our other halves had quite a bit of celebrity status for the hour we were there. Big tough bikers.... yeah right!

  10. #10
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    When our cat was behaving strangely, mum took it to the vet, and the vet explains that theres no problem and all the cat wants is a boyfriend. :slap:

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  11. #11
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    Logging in to KB.
    If a man is alone in the woods and there isn't a woke Hollywood around to call him racist, is he still white?



  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nagash View Post
    This one time I accidentally the whole thing.
    The whole thing?!
    Some people just can't seem to comprehend that they do not have the right to be unoffended in their lives.
    Quote Originally Posted by Fatt Max View Post
    Watching your wife giving birth is like watching your favourite pub burn down.
    Quote Originally Posted by Fatt Max View Post
    I can roll a turd that reaches 15kg before it snaps off my arse

  13. #13
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    i left 10 tabs of porn on my mums computer and went to work for the night i come home and computer had a big sign on it. "your never using this computer again" LOL was like 14 at the time
    my 250 doesn't satisfy me anymore, shes just not doing it

  14. #14
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    Replying to Thread is the most embarrassing moment...

  15. #15
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    One of mine was when my ex and I walked in on his dad watching porn (more embarrassing for him I'm sure, but shit, couldn't look him in the eye for weeks)

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