Young death - Donations

[caseye]

Keep hating it Anika,your'e allowed to!
Wish it all wasn't so black and white, but hang in there you are entitled to feel sad and upset, we're here and we're standing with you.
Take care.
Mark.

[Genestho]

True I didn't think of that. But I'm supposed to be entitled to 80% of whatever he was earning at his current job, not all his earnings so yea. I actually even sent them in a piece of paper Alex's boss gave me showing his earnings since he started there. Uh I don't even know why I care. If I won the lotto right now it wouldn't even make me happy, in fact it would piss me off. Sucks that I have the most money I've ever had now that I'm not paying rent (will be in 2 weeks though) and Alex isn't here to enjoy it with me. Tomorrow its only 3 days till Alex would have been 22..that time last year I woke up to Alex next to me, wished him happy birthday in the middle of the night, took him out for dinner, and was only just pregnant with Connor. I hate this

Previous years earnings.
Money won't buy you happiness but at least you and Connor are not wanting for anything right now, which is one less stress and it's important that you can look after yourself and Connor with the basics.

The year of firsts is tough.
Every birthday, every anniversary is painful for the loss. It also seems like you build up to the day, anticipate it with dread.
With time - it's easier, less raw i guess are the words.

Truthfully you have a long road to go, and it is tough with kiddies, as they start to ask ALOT of heart breakingly hard questions.

I now try to plan ahead treats for anniversaries if i can.

Gave me something to look forward to rather than something to dread, made the days slightly easier to get through (doesn't always work but it's something) - also creating newer memories.

Looking after yourself and being with family and friends, on these days is important
Thinking of you.

[Oakie]

I don't think it works like that .. from what i have seen of the system is that they pay 80% of the previous years earnings ... sorry about that ... I am unsure of the exact breakdown ...

Yep, that's right. If an incapacity lasts more than 4 weeks ACC have to take into account the whole years earnings prior to the date of incapacity. It means you have to wait until the old employers reply (which they should be able to do within a day) and then ACC make the assessment which can then hopefully be paid pretty quick.

[boman]

True I didn't think of that. But I'm supposed to be entitled to 80% of whatever he was earning at his current job, not all his earnings so yea. I actually even sent them in a piece of paper Alex's boss gave me showing his earnings since he started there. Uh I don't even know why I care. If I won the lotto right now it wouldn't even make me happy, in fact it would piss me off. Sucks that I have the most money I've ever had now that I'm not paying rent (will be in 2 weeks though) and Alex isn't here to enjoy it with me. Tomorrow its only 3 days till Alex would have been 22..that time last year I woke up to Alex next to me, wished him happy birthday in the middle of the night, took him out for dinner, and was only just pregnant with Connor. I hate this

You are allowed to hate this. Like TGW said the firsts are really hard and strenuous. There is nothing we can do to turn back the clock, believe me, all I can say is get out and about for his birthday, go see people, friends, family, try not to sit at home and think about the "what ifs" they will only make the day longer and harder. Things do get a little bit blunter each year, the hurt not as bad, the pain a little easier to deal with. Treat yourself, do something for you and Connor, try not to let the Firsts get to you.

Empty words I know, but it is all I have to give to you.

[Mrs Busa Pete]

Keep hating it Anika,your'e allowed to!
Wish it all wasn't so black and white, but hang in there you are entitled to feel sad and upset, we're here and we're standing with you.
Take care.
Mark.

Hi Anika sorry i havn't been on for a while but have been really busy.

Marks words would have to be best i have hurd for you because you have every wright to feel the way you do.

Just wanted to let you know that i will be thinking of you today. take love and keep connor near because i'm sure he will help and think only positive thoughts hard i know but please try.

Wendy

[MyGSXF:Me]

If it's a nice day where you are, take little Connor & go for a walk along the beach.. tis very soothing for the soul!

Thinking of you Anika

[Genestho]

Tough day for you sweets. Take care of yourself. X

[Her_C4]

Just wanted to pop in and let you and Connor know that we are all thinking of you today and wishing you well - take care

[caseye]

Looks like i just made it "today". Anika you just do whatevr you have to to make today yours.
It's going to hurt some, no question,we all want for you to be Ok.
We , those of us here who know how you've suffered and have come through thick and thin to this point are quietly confident that you've got the common sense and the ability to bring you and your little fella through it all.
Take care Anika, remember, we're here, remember, one day/thing at a time, it really is that simple.
Thinking of you.
Mark.

[Dutchee]

Hey Anika, sorry I missed yesterday but hoping you're okay.
Even if one of us isn't available if you need us, someone will be. A lot of us are thinking of you.
Never be afraid to email/pm or post here if you need help, or just say you're okay.
Big hugs and a big cuddle for little Connor.
Take care and remember, you're not alone.
Michelle

[DreamRunner]

Hey, just stopping by to say hello. My internets a bit screwy at the moment 'cuz I used up all the allowance watching youtube videos before my exam :-S so I'm supposed to be saving it!
Anyway, hope things are going alright for you. Keep smiling, if you can.

[Buellluva]

Hi Anika, hope you're doing OK at the mo. Have been watching this post, and sharing a bit of your sadness, as I lost a few mates to crashes, when they were very young.
I wasn't going to post, as most of what I wanted to say has been said. It is amazing when tragedy strikes how people will help others they dont know, I have been blown away by what I have read, it restores my faith in humanity.
I cant help but feel an attachment to young Connor, as I lost my Dad when I was very young, (too young to remember). Keep hold of these posts for Connor, and all the photos, clippings and everything else about his Dad, as I'm sure that there will come a day when it will become very important to him, as it did for me, to find out as much as I could.
Dont worry about the future just hang in and survive, from day to day, laugh at the good times, cry, scream, vent do whatever you need to do, to get by.
Hang tough girl, and may time ease your pain, all the best from myself and my wife and 2 kids.

[Tink]

Just recently I have been through a place and each time I remember... may peace come from within... I am not religious by far... but it never stops me saying something when I cross a path! If that makes sense.

[caseye]

We're missing you Anika.Hope everything is working out as it should.
Weather has been crap of late, been a bit busy what with riding to this protest and this protest meeting and then that protest, but hey I'm not protesting about the protesting. Confused ? I am.
ACC have picked on the wrong people, we give a damn and we're not about to be pushed around.

Still got time to check in on our friends though, drop us all a line aye, just to say Hi.
Take care and give that little fella, Connor that great big ol KB'ers hug.

[alexm]

I got you Mark. Yea as much as I'm not really a big fan of bikes anymore, as you guys are saying people are gonna spend less on protective gear and the like. I remember when Alex told me how much it was I was blown away, so making it more is disgusting. We still got him all the protective gear though, infact that the weekend before that Monday we had just gotten his jacket for him..he only got to wear it once Connor's doing really good, he's so clever and very cheeky and happy just like his dad.