Wearing Hi-Viz Black.
Putin persecutes homosexuals in his own country, then goes and enters another country through the back door.
Very mixed messages from Russia.
I don't know why people in the US are so afraid of World War III. Even if Russia declared war tomorrow, we are still at least 3 years away from the states joining the war!
The scariest thing about this world war 3 starting is that we are on the Germans' side. They've never won a world war yet.
TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”
Anarchic Wild Child
A Police Officer was patrolling late at night off the main highway. At nearly midnight, he sees a couple in a car, in lovers' lane, with the interior light brightly glowing.
He carefully approaches the car to get a closer look. Then he sees a young man behind the wheel, reading a magazine. He immediately notices a young woman in the rear seat, filing her fingernails.
Puzzled by this surprising situation, the cop walks to the car and gently raps on the driver's window. The young man lowers his window.
'Uh, yes, Officer'?
The cop asks: 'What are you doing?'
The young man says: 'Well, Officer, I'm reading a magazine.'
Pointing towards the young woman in the back seat the cop says: 'And what is she doing?'
The young man shrugs: 'Sir, I believe she's filing her fingernails.'
Now, the cop is totally confused. A young couple, alone, in a car, at night in a lover's lane and nothing inappropriate is happening!
The trooper asks: 'What's your age, young man?'
The young man says: 'I'm 22, sir.'
The cop asks: 'And what's her age?'
The young man smiles, looks at his watch, and replies: 'She'll be 16 in 11 minutes.'
"So if you meet me, have some sympathy, have some courtesy, have some taste ..."
Enigma
You'd never go hungry with Nigella Gaz.
If it weren't for flashbacks...I'd have no memory at all..
one placenta
A man received the following text from his neighbor:
I am so sorry Bob. I've been riddled with guilt and I have to confess.
I have been tapping your wife, day and night when you're not around. In
fact, more than you. I'm not getting any at home, but that's no excuse.
I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest
apology with my promise that it won't happen again.
The man, anguished and betrayed, went into his bedroom, grabbed his gun, and
without a word, shot his wife and killed her.
A few moments later, a second text came in:
Damn autocorrect. It should have read "wifi", not "wife".
__________________________________________________ ____
KB's Chief Cats
oh fucking come on! Thats about the 10th repost this year!Originally Posted by ellipsis
one placenta
ahh shit...beat me with a stick...I'll take my pants off...
Wearing Hi-Viz Black.
Go back 7 posts before that one...
TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”
BogOff-Cant you see I'm busy?
A man was riding a bus, minding his own business, when the gorgeous woman next to him started to breastfeed her baby.
The baby wouldn't take it, so she said,
"Come on sweetie, eat it all up or
I'll have to give it to this nice man next to us."
Five minutes later, the baby was still
not feeding, so she said,
"Come on, honey. Take it or I'll give
it to this nice man here."
A few minutes later,
the anxious man blurted out,
"Come on kid.
Make up your mind!
I was supposed to get off two stops ago!
Enigma
You'd never go hungry with Nigella Gaz.
If it weren't for flashbacks...I'd have no memory at all..
Forum whore
“There's nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there? ”-Clerks
BogOff-Cant you see I'm busy?
Human Resources Manager: "What is your greatest weakness?"
Applicant: "My honesty."
Human Resources Manager: "I can't agree with that. I don't think honesty is necessarily a weakness at all."
Applicant : "I don't really give a shit what you think, you ugly fat cnut!"
Forum whore
"Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl."
The priest asks, "Is that you, little Joey Pagano?"
"Yes, Father, it is."
"And who was the girl you were with?"
"I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."
"Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?"
"I cannot say."
"Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?"
"I'll never tell."
"Was it Nina Capelli?"
"I'm sorry, but I cannot name her."
"Was it Cathy Piriano?"
"My lips are sealed."
"Was it Rosa DiAngelo, then?"
"Please, Father! I cannot tell you."
The priest sighs in frustration. "You're very tight lipped, and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months. Now you go and behave yourself."
Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and whispers, "What'd you get?"
"Four months vacation and five good leads..."
"Statistics are used as a drunk uses lampposts - for support, not illumination."
Hardcore Biker
An Idiot.......
Anorak
pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
Kinky is using a feather. Perverted is using the whole chicken
Enigma
You'd never go hungry with Nigella Gaz.
If it weren't for flashbacks...I'd have no memory at all..
There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)
Posting Permissions
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks