Friday jokes

[flashg]

When I was in the industry the toilets weren't kept very clean

[Laava]

When I was in the industry the toilets weren't kept very clean

WTF? You can't piss into a toilet with a hardon! Were you going for the ceiling deflection?

[Maha]

WTF? You can't piss into a toilet with a hardon! Were you going for the ceiling deflection?

It's a bugger to find that out at a sleepy 3am.

[gjm]

Researchers at the Ministry of Transport found over 200 dead crows near SH1 north of Hamilton recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.

However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.

An Ornithological Behaviorist was called in to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills, who very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger.

The scientific conclusion was that while all the lookout crows could say "Cah", none could say "Lorry."

[Moise]

Obviously British crows. Australian crows would say "truck".

[awa355]

When I was in the industry the toilets weren't kept very clean

You were a 'Spyder'?????

[tri boy]

Obviously British crows. Australian crows would say "truck".

Aussie crows sound more like: FARK, Fark, fark............Lead injection to their heads help.
They are a shitty alarm clock.

[Swoop]

Thought I'd seen the end of the Trick or Treaters after I'd poured a bucket of piss over the last lot from my upstairs window, but, fuck me, within five minutes two much older looking kids knocked on the door and got the same treatment.

I'd love to see them explain the smell when they take those police costumes back to the fancy dress shop.

[roogazza]

haha that last one I did the same with a coathanger in Spain once, to charge my shaver.

[oldrider]

Thought I'd seen the end of the Trick or Treaters after I'd poured a bucket of piss over the last lot from my upstairs window, but, fuck me, within five minutes two much older looking kids knocked on the door and got the same treatment.

I'd love to see them explain the smell when they take those police costumes back to the fancy dress shop.

Hey Swoop - good luck with that one!

[YellowDog]

any takers ?

[5150]

any takers ?

You that desperate? That little shit head Akzle might be keen for a spooning sesh with ya

[Swoop]

Hey Swoop - good luck with that one!

The little pricks haven't come back yet. I guess they are still washing their costumes at the fancy dress hire shop!

[oneofsix]

demonstration of sealskin riding gear

[gjm]

any takers ?