I shared my home made chocolate brownies with my boss and work colleagues today.
I'd been tipped off HR may do a random drugs test later. If I'm going down every fucker's going down.
Wearing Hi-Viz Black.
I shared my home made chocolate brownies with my boss and work colleagues today.
I'd been tipped off HR may do a random drugs test later. If I'm going down every fucker's going down.
TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”
Grumpy Old Bastard
I like it!Originally Posted by Swoop
. “No pleasure is worth giving up for two more years in a rest home.” Kingsley Amis
L-Plate Rider
Don't touch that dial
An Irish window cleaner is
cleaning windows when
He sees a woman inside
breastfeeding her baby.
Seeing her flustered he
tells her what a beautiful
natural sign it is and not
to be embarrassed.
He goes on to tell her
that as he is single he
has never seen a woman
feeding her baby before
and tells her that he is
intrigued with the whole
thing.
To cut along story
short, once he has her
confidence he ends up
trying sucking the breast
himself to find out what
the taste of the milk is
like.
The woman now starts
getting aroused, groans
a little as she starts to
lift up her skirt. "Is there
anything else you would
like?" she whispers.
"You don't have
Farley's rusks do you?", he
says.
Wearing Hi-Viz Black.
10 centipedes = 1 millipede
1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds
10 rations = 1 decoration
1 trident -1 prong = 1 decadent
2 monograms = 1 diagram
1 million microphones = 1 megaphone.
TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”
BogOff-Cant you see I'm busy?
__________________
Wearing Hi-Viz Black.
If I ever win the lottery, rest assured nobody around me will be poor.
I will move to a rich neighbourhood.
TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”
Enigma
You'd never go hungry with Nigella Gaz.
If it weren't for flashbacks...I'd have no memory at all..
Forum whore
After being married for 50 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said, "Fifty years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 23-year-old girl.”
“Now ... We have an $800,000 home, a $65,000 car, a nice big bed and a large-screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 73-year-old woman.
It seems to me that you're not holding up your side of the bargain."
My wife is a very reasonable woman.
She told me to go out and find a hot 23-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap house, driving a junk car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white TV.
On a Motorcycle you're penetrating distance, right along with the machine!! In a car you're just a spectator, the windshields like a TV!!
'Life's Journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out! Shouting, ' Holy sh!t... What a Ride!! '
Wearing Hi-Viz Black.
In Louisiana, USA, authorities have captured a 500 lb alligator suspected of eating a local man.
Before the incident, it was a 100 lb alligator.
TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”
BogOff-Cant you see I'm busy?
Get me some of that
Wearing Hi-Viz Black.
In Australia's Northern Territory, there's now one man-eating croc, for every two and a half people.
With the emphasis on the half!
TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”
BogOff-Cant you see I'm busy?
__________
Kruger-Dunning Parts n Service
Govt gives you nothing because it creates nothing - Javier Milei
Wearing Hi-Viz Black.
In future, school shootings in Texas will be known as late abortions.
TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”
Wearing Hi-Viz Black.
My neighbour is hard to please.
Yesterday he was complaining about the length of my grass, then at four 'o' clock this morning he's complaining about the noise.
TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”
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