Smacking - sometimes it's just hard not to do!

[jimmy 2006]

incorrect. if you want to quote facts at least get them right

the increase in child abuse stats in sweden was directly related to actually monitoring the cases of child abuse instead of the Nz mentality of sweeping it under the carpet.

it is your right as a parent to discipline your children and i a have no right to tell you how to do that.

what is not ok is assuming that your children do not have the right to choose not to be hit. AND when they are too young to not be able to understand right and wrong that is where the Govt has to jump in with legislation.

by hitting your kids you are teaching them a way of dealing with tough situations that is not socially acceptable. imagine one day they own their own business and their employee's play up, they loose control in the same way their parents did and hit their employee.
Is this an ok way for them to act? No. so how is it different if it is your kids instead of your employee?

[devnull]

incorrect. if you want to quote facts at least get them right

the increase in child abuse stats in sweden was directly related to actually monitoring the cases of child abuse instead of the Nz mentality of sweeping it under the carpet.

it is your right as a parent to discipline your children and i a have no right to tell you how to do that.

what is not ok is assuming that your children do not have the right to choose not to be hit. AND when they are too young to not be able to understand right and wrong that is where the Govt has to jump in with legislation.

by hitting your kids you are teaching them a way of dealing with tough situations that is not socially acceptable. imagine one day they own their own business and their employee's play up, they loose control in the same way their parents did and hit their employee.
Is this an ok way for them to act? No. so how is it different if it is your kids instead of your employee?

Oh dear... the slippery slope myth too

To educate you, since that seems to have been missed somewhere along the line...

Sweden changed their laws in 1979, to commemorate the Year of the Child. The "increase" was NOT due to "monitoring", it was violent youth crime dealt with by the courts (Beckett, British Journal of Social Work)

If you want to shoot your mouth off, at least make an attempt to learn a bit about the topic first.

Now onto the "slippery slope" myth i.e. that kids learn violent behaviour from being smacked.

That's just as accurate as saying that drinking coffee leads to heroin addiction.

Of course, this myth was soundly routed when Otago Uni published their research on the long term effects of physical discipline in 2006.

Another nail in the anti-smacking, tofu munching, kaftan wearing coffin


As for the govt thinking they have the right to dictate that my children are the property of the state... think again.
Like most parents, I'll take ANY action I deem appropriate to protect my kids from those zealots, who are pretty much fucked in the head (Bradford being a prime example of using children to manipulate people)

I'm sure that some of the cops here will be able to tell you that violent teens and adults respond well to hugs and kisses when being calmed down at incidents.... Personally, I've always found a 5-cell Maglite equally effective when dealing with drunk and obnoxious people... (never thump the ambo) Of course, personal responsibility is no longer a requirement, according to the left-wing bootlickers.... And the crime stats reflect that attitude

[devnull]

BTW, when I say "violent crime", I'm referring to youth vs youth - mainly serious assaults and rape.

See http://www.bra.se for Swedish crime statistics

[Beemer]

I was at the Whitakers meeting at Manfeild a few weeks ago and there were these two boys aged about 8-10 who kept jumping on the plastic seats in the stands and climbing over them. In the end I turned around and said "how about you two sit down and stop being annoying?"

The climbed over the seats and one of the ugly little freckle-faced shits leaned over the back of the seat and glared at me. I was really pissed off by now, so I hissed "do NOT start with me, you will not win".

Both clambered down and told their mother, who ignored them, so they turned to daddy, who turned around to look for the big bad woman who had dared to pick on his babies! You know the sort - cropped blonde hair, no neck - so I just glared at him too! The kids were obviously traumatised by my actions and had to lie across mummy and daddy and be cuddled. Aww, diddums!

I can't stand badly behaved kids and tend to say something now rather than stew in silence!

[Beemer]

True, but I think we need to stop wrapping kids up in cottonwool too - let them fall out of trees, skin their knees, and hurt themselves, brush themselves off and do it again. Too much "you can't do that" in todays world

Agreed! I interviewed the retiring principal of a local country school last week and I loved his final comment: "long may the kids of Koputaroa School play bull rush and climb trees!"

[Tink]

do they have a lot to answer for... I like that climbing trees, and bull rush... forget OSH, lets have some real playgrounds back in the schools... flying foxes when I was 5... sigh the good old days when kids respected their teachers and parents.

I remember gettting the strap at 12 on my hands... boy it hurt, and I never did it again... IT WAS NOT THAT BAD what I did BTW lol

I deal with my naughty kids at school with the 3 method... and removing the good things they enjoy.

Consistancy in verbal & removal is far better than saying "its ok to hit".

[mashman]

Consistancy in verbal & removal is far better than saying "its ok to hit".

Agreed, but that doesn't work in all cases and by the time they get to school it can be 3 years too late.

[Tink]

Agreed, but that doesn't work in all cases and by the time they get to school it can be 3 years too late.

I understand what you mean "not in all cases" but I do believe that "its never too late"... hoping one day something will click in that child ...

There is nothing in this world that says one is always right
There is nothing in this world that says one has the right answer
There is nothing in this world that makes ones behaviour ok.
Never feel your not good enough... etc etc etc.

Lack of education a big factor... but sure it would be boring if we were all the same... maybe healthy if we were a more tolerant of one another.... and forgiving!

It saddens me... when I see negativity... but rocks my socks when people say... heh have a great day, and they smile...

[MSTRS:Me]

...they loose control in the same way their parents did ....

BULLSHIT!!!
A smack on the arse of a naughty kid is NOT losing control. It is (re)exerting your control over their behaviour, when they won't do it for themselves.
Losing control is beating them with fists, feet, implements...and that deserves the full retaliation of the law.
The two scenarios could not be further apart.
People like you that attempt to equate the two as being the same, need a smack to open your tiny minds...

[jimmy 2006]

thanks, case and point right there.

you havn't learnt to communicate properly so now you want to smack me. If you did, i would make sure you got done for assault.

see, smacking is not the answer.

[mashman]

Ever seen a parent shouting at their kid? they're generally barking orders, don't do that, stop that, get back here, do as i tell you!!!! That to me is losing control... it never seems to be backed up with a quiet conversation, it's almost as though the child is inconveniencing the adult for being, well, childish! Ludicrous!!!!

[MSTRS:Me]

you havn't learnt to communicate properly so now you want to smack me.

Communication includes the written word, and the writer assumes (doh!) that the reader possesses sufficient intelligence to understand the meaning intended.
I see you don't measure up to my assumption. I said 'you needs' - not 'I wants'...

[Genie]

i can see this getting a little out of hand....smack ourselves on the head and wake up. :slap:
a smack on the leg ...is a smack!!! a bash is something entirely different. beating a child is not a smack. a smack is a controlled physical form of discipline. yelling and screaming at your child is another form of abuse.

got an hysterical women...slap her out of it - it works. got an out of control child.....try reasoning with them...hello!!! it's not going to happen this is a child, they stop listening after 4 words...(bit like men) a quick slap and they snap out of it.
I read the other day some woman down south got jailed for beating her children, jug cords etc. shit, when i grew up that was common place, not a good thing and glad to see it is punishable by the courts and there is justice for the children. But come on, wake up, a smack is not abuse.

Now smile and have a happy day. Spread the love not the anger.

[MSTRS:Me]

i can see this * getting a little out of hand....smack ourselves on the head and wake up. :slap:
a smack on the leg ...is a smack!!! a bash is something entirely different. beating a child is not a smack. a smack is a controlled physical form of discipline. yelling and screaming at your child is another form of abuse.

got an hysterical women...slap her out of it - it works. got an out of control child.....try reasoning with them...hello!!! it's not going to happen this is a child, they stop listening after 4 words...(bit like men) a quick slap and they snap out of it.
I read the other day some woman down south got jailed for beating her children, jug cords etc. shit, when i grew up that was common place, not a good thing and glad to see it is punishable by the courts and there is justice for the children. But come on, wake up, a smack is not abuse.

Now smile and have a happy day. Spread the love not the anger.

You lost me about here....

[Genie]

You lost me about here....

lost me too...but i've been lost for years. to many smacks on the head