A woman with a clipboard just knocked at our door.
She asked if we would have an Ethiopian Child for Christmas.
We normally have turkey, but fuck it, we'll give it a go
Missing my buddy Morepower
A woman with a clipboard just knocked at our door.
She asked if we would have an Ethiopian Child for Christmas.
We normally have turkey, but fuck it, we'll give it a go
Forum whore
xmas lights are like niggers, they are chained together, half of them dont work and they look best hanging from a tree
Missing my buddy Morepower
Australian version of Jingle bells
Dashing through the bush, in a rusty holden ute, Kicking up the dust, esky in the boot, Kelpie by my side, singing Christmas songs, Its summer time and am in my singlet, shorts & thongs,
Oh jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way, Christmas in Australia
On a scorching summers day, Hey!
Jingle bells. Jingle bells, Christmas time is beaut! Oh what fun it is to ride in a rusty Holden Ute
Forum whore
why doesnt santa have any kids?
cos he only comes once a year and its always down a chimney.
my blog: http://sunsthomasandfriends.weebly.com/index.html
the really happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery when on a detour.
DILLIGAF
Re: Onions and a Christmas tree
>
>
> > A family is sitting around the supper table. The son asks his father,
> > "Dad,
> > how many kinds of breasts are there? The father, surprised, answers,
> > "Well,
> > son, there are three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a women's
>breasts
> > are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are
>like
> > pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like
>onions."
> >
> > "Onions?"
> > "Yes, see them and they make you cry."
> > This infuriated the wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mum, how
>many
> > kinds of willies are there?" The mother, surprised, smiles and looks
>at
> > her
> > daughter and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In
>a
> > man's twenties, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his
> > thirties and forties, it is a birch, flexible but reliable. After his
> > fifties, it is like a Christmas tree." "A Christmas tree?" "Yes, dead
>from
> > the root up and the balls are for decoration only"
WISDOM IS KNOWING KARMA REALLY CAN'T GET YOU.
SPEED KILLS, BUT YOU GET THERE FASTER
DILLIGAF = Does it look like I give a FUCK - Hell no!
Trouble ;)
Christmas is a joke
Originally Posted by 325rocket
Cold Kiwi
Everyone loves duck sauce, is the amazing or is this amazing?!
DILLIGAF
Xmas Bike
Right after Christmas a city cop was on his horse waiting to cross the street
when a little girl on her new shiny bike stopped beside him.
"Nice bike," the cop said "did Santa bring it to you?"
"Yep," the little girl said," he sure did!"
The cop looked the bike over and handed the girl a $20 ticket for a safety violation. The cop said, "Next year, tell Santa to put a reflector light on the back of it."
The young girl looked up at the cop and said, "Nice horse you got there sir, did Santa bring it to you?"
"Yes, he sure did," chuckled the cop.
The little girl looked up at the cop and said, "Next year, tell Santa the dick goes underneath the horse not on top."
SPEED KILLS, BUT YOU GET THERE FASTER
DILLIGAF = Does it look like I give a FUCK - Hell no!
BMW Motorrad
What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?
They both leave little boys' rooms with empty sacks.
If you can make it on Kiwibiker you can make it anywhere.
DILLIGAF
HO HO HO" I just called for all yo mamas!
Ever wondered why the post office don't let santa write back to
your letters, well here it is....
Dear Santa,
I wud like a kool toy space ranjur for Xmas. Iv ben a good boy
all yeah. YeR FReND, BiLLy
Dear Billy,
Nice spelling. You're on your way to being a career lawn-care
specialist. How 'bout I send you a f**king book so you can
learn to read and write?
I'm giving your older brother the space ranger, at least HE can
spell! Santa
SPEED KILLS, BUT YOU GET THERE FASTER
DILLIGAF = Does it look like I give a FUCK - Hell no!
Missing my buddy Morepower
Ho ho ho ho
BogOff-Cant you see I'm busy?
Christmas will be good in heaven this year.
Patrick Swayze is doing the dancing,
Farah Fawcett's the angel,
Steven Gately is singing carols around the tree,
Keith Floyd is cooking Christmas dinner and
Michael Jackson is playing with the kids!
snot crasher
is a classic aus xmas song that! I got sick to death of the malls over there blasting it all the time
AKA.
Missing my buddy Morepower
A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, 'Dad, how
many kinds of boobs are there?
The father, surprised, answers, 'Well, son, there are three kinds of
Boobs:
In her 20's, a woman's are like melons, round and firm.
In her 30's to 40's, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.
After 50,
they are like onions'.
'Onions?'
'Yes, you see them and they make you cry.'
This infuriated his wife and daughter! so the daughter said,
'Mum, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?.
The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, 'Well dear,
a man goes through three phases.
In his 20's, his willy is like an oak
tree, mighty and hard.
In his 30's and 40's, it is like a birch,
flexible but reliable.
After his 50's, it is like a Christmas Tree.'
'A Christmas tree?'
'Yes - the root's dead and the balls are just for decoration.'
Brain meats taste good
What's the best thing about being a P addict?
Only 3 sleeps till Christmas!
Speed limits are just a suggestion, like pants.
Hardcore Biker
Dogs are not just for Christmas.
With careful carving you can easily make the meat stretch out to New Year's.
Learn basic maintenance as motorcycle boots are not comfortable for walking in
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