TOTO gets lost

[Gremlin]

Finally... an alarm that sounds after the sun has risen and the birds have started chirping. Set the alarm for about 0830 if I remember rightly, but we probably only got up around 9am. Finally able to take our sweet time getting ready, we did just that, away from the accommodation around 11am.

Toto was once again doing the long route to Picton (such is the luxury of not having to work), so... fingers crossed, he was going to make it to Picton. In reality, he would probably make it fine, and Picton being just fractionally smaller than Christchurch, I doubted it would take him long to find the Backpackers (and he had already been there anyway).

Sorted out the client, wrote up the first report, and received a txt from Toto informing me he was in Arthur's Pass, enjoying pancakes for lunch. Left Christchurch around 3pm, at least refreshed for another boring ride to Picton. Before this trip, I had never done the route between Blenheim and Kaikoura. Now, I was doing this route for the 2nd time in 4 days... There are some good parts, but mostly its pretty damn boring. Oh for the time to do a longer route.

The "highlight" of the trip was encountering a stock truck dumping a steady stream of effluent down the middle of the road. A blue MX5 in front of me certainly didn't seem to impressed with this, and we both passed it as quickly as possible (with as little shit being slung in my direction as possible). By the time I had reached Domett, I was cold and tired, the sun had disappeared, and instead of making do, I decided to stop to don thermal top and rain jacket. Trying to keep my helmet on because my ears hurt like hell from the constant use of earplugs... I failed miserably. Polo tops don't stretch over helmets

In the workout that could also be described as wriggling into more gear, I was again passed by the shit-spewing truck. Oh yay. The roads leading to the offending truck smelt of shit (funnily enough) and time was spent trying to keep my tyres out of the trucks line, which seemed to vary from corner to corner. I caught up to the truck just before the Kaikoura coast, and in the slow vehicle bay, I was able to motion him to pull over. The useful chat went as follows:

Me: Do you know you're dumping your stock effluent all over the road?
Truck: Yep
Me: Do you know its illegal?
Truck: No, its not.
Me: Well, it is. (at this point, I'm reasonably certain, as I think I've read a post on KB... so it must be true )
Truck: No, it ain't.

This was obviously going far places in a short space of time, so I shrugged, walked back off the road, noted his rego, and motioned for him to carry on. I must follow this up, and see what the ruling is, as its dangerous, disgusting, and I'm sure there are rules about unloading on the public roads. Unfortunately, not a cop was seen all the way to Picton, otherwise, I would have stopped to find out an answer.

Passed the truck shortly after, the road smelt better and I didn't have to dodge shit any more. The rest of the trip to Picton passed without incident.

Sure enough, checking into Tombstone Backpackers, Mr Toto was nowhere to be seen. This was expected and I settled in to wait. I heard his arrival a good 30-60 seconds before sighting him, enabling me to walk out from the room to the driveway (on the opposite side of the complex) and motion him to his park (which was kindly provided under cover, at the front door, by the owners).

This time, he approved of the accommodation, complimented the scalding temperature of the shower and while he was showering and settling, I set off to rustle up some grub (having missed any proper lunch). I found it in the form of DA Restaurant, an expensive pizza, but damn tasty, and the largest I have set eyes on (pic attached for proof). I timed the walk back to the backpackers... two pizza slices long.

Toto was still in the shower, claiming they had been occupied, so I kindly left him a couple of slices (he did say he didn't want anything, but knowing him, he would never pass up pizza). I then showered and on the way out of the room, I told him there was a thread on KB about him Found him in front of the computer and retrieved the key. I didn't make it out of the room as I ended up interrupting a couple of girls (american and israeli) in their discussion about where to exercise and ended talking with them until 0030, about everything ranging from travelling NZ and good backpackers, to Israel's 6 day war.

Toto (the actual single male) joined us only shortly, took no advantage and retrieved the key. Realising the time, goodnights were made, as we were up horribly early again (self inflicted punishment).

[Gremlin]

Tuesday...

Early alarms were an old joke by now, but 0500 still wasn't an easy rise. This time, it was a ferry at 0630, check in at 0530. The owners had kindly left the complimentary breakfast out for us, knowing we were leaving early. Hastily consumed, gear packed, the other two bikers staying at the backpackers had already left several minutes prior.

They didn't get far ahead... one vehicle in front of us in Lane 9. No chains out again on the ferry, so a bit of fiddling with the truck tie down points and the bikes were safely secured. Overpriced food on the ferry not required, the trip was spent dozing and chatting with one of the bikers who was from up north, and knew the bikers involved in the accident (and while not in the same group TT wise, were all travelling together) in Golden Downs.

With Toto due in Auckland by nightfall, and with me staying in Wellington, due to work, we said our goodbyes on the ferry. Left Toto following the right route out of Wellington, I reckoned he should make Auckland without many problems. Rest of the day was seeing clients. Went hunting for dinner around the West Plaza Hotel and found a small fish and chip place and enjoyed a meal.


Wednesday...


As usual, didn't get enough sleep, watching too many movies and up early around 0830. Continental breakfast was included (gotta love wotif) and once that was clarified with the front desk on checkout, more clients until the early afternoon.

The previous day, I had found a great Takeaways between Lambton Quay and Featherston street, which had lasagne and bolognese and run by a very nice old lady. Back there for another lunch stop, there was a bit of no mans land opposite, next to the entry to a parking garage, and with all the bike spaces full (let alone find a space that would fit panniers) the space was handy.

With a sense of relief, I left Wellington. I had got used to the country, with small towns, little traffic and easy navigation far too easily but who cares. It was great being in the country. The night stop was Turangi, and I wasn't going to suffer through SH1 again, and the straights around Marton. This time, I chose the Rimutakas, briefly stopping for gas in Featherston. Gotta love a long range, as I hadn't filled since Christchurch on Monday. The old petrol station attendant was stunned, and almost charged my gas to another person who had a small fill. He had previously ridden, so a few stories were swapped and I was on my way. No fill would be required to make Turangi.

As I approached the turn off for Mangamarie, I was reminded of the back route I had learned from locals in Carterton on a previous trip. Brakes applied with haste, I just made the turn off, and proceeded the back way to the Pahiatua Track. More corners, turns and SH54 later and guided by the GPS I was back on SH1, but thoroughly enjoying my meandering trip north. Travelling with less time pressures yielded such great riding! With the GPS now listing my ETA around 1930, it was time to reach Turangi, so proceeded up SH1 at legal pace. Desert Rd isn't too bad, certainly not the best road in the country, but better than a lot.

Exiting Desert Rd, I had the satisfaction of meeting someone more crazy than me. The bike was listing an air temperature around 6 degrees, and a cyclist came the opposite way, wearing nothing but her lycra shorts and T-shirt. Definitely crazy in those temperatures. The only other interruption to the monotony was coming over a crest onto a straight and finding an oncoming cop. Apparently my mkII eyeballs were better than his markI ones, and jumping on the rear brake dropped the handful of kph required to be legal. Unmolested, I carried on the short distance to Turangi and checked in around 1930.

By 2000, I was unpacked, bedding made. Difficult decisions such as finding a meal, showering in the open block and what to do for the evening were solved by jumping into bed and going to sleep. I fell asleep pondering when I last went to bed by 2015, but fell asleep before finding an answer

[Gremlin]

Thursday was the final day of "leave", but no work was required. While the alarm went off at 0800, I didn't crawl out of bed until 0845, a good 12.5 hours sleep. Damn, I felt great, not a cloud in the sky, it was going to be a great day.

Careful not to waste any of it, I sought out the Turangi bakery for a late breakfast / early lunch. Chicken and vegetable pie, filled roll of avocado, chicken and relish, and an enormous piece of carrot cake at a bargain price, I wobbled out of Turangi about 11am.

Again, I stunned the petrol station lady in Tokaanu, she commented she had barely seen another bike fill with more than $25. $45-50 wasn't uncommon for me. Leaving Tokaanu, I stopped for a pic at the lookout where the view was stunning. Searching the GPS, I found my required road on the western side of Lake Taupo. Kakaho Rd, an initially sealed road quickly turning to gravel, but more importantly it led to the Pureora Forest.

Having already been into this forest once before, I had missed some of it due to time and gas constraints. This time, I wanted to explore the roads I hadn't done and also allow me to provide the tracks to the NZ Open GPS guys, as none of the roads were on the map. This went well... perhaps too well, as the photographs will show. Sometimes, its best to know your limits before you're in the thick of it, and when you're on road tyres and walking forward to see if the terrain is possible, its usually the point at which you should turn around. Ignoring road closure signs due to washouts, or ducking and bumping your way through bushes will only lead to turning around much later However... you still get to try the road until you have to turn around.

With several roads ridden through, and another section of the forest mapped out, time was again in short supply. Heading to the other side of the forest, aiming for Bennydale, I found yet more roads I have not yet done, so *sigh* it will necessitate at least one more trip *sigh* I love the road through to Te Kuiti, so I enjoyed this once more. Ignoring the GPS, I avoided SH1 until Ngaruawahia, satisfied that I had at least done a few more back roads.

Rest of the trip as they say, is history. Nothing to write about on SH1 is there?

All up, about 4400km covered in 8 days. About 2.5 days of that was spent working. Bike ticked over the 40k mark entering Manukau, all goals achieved, and on Friday I let my boss know I need to go to the South Island next year

[Mom]

Best you be carrying a spare set of rims Gremlin, for those off road opportunities, fantastic ride reports you mad buggers!

[Sharry]

Very cool write ups dudes, you guys have had a heck of a great time. Good on yas

[TOTO]

As some of you will know, I have a rather cool and annoying to Gremlin (double points) alarm ring tone, for when I really really need to get up as soon as possible. I had made sure that this tone sounded at 4:30am - just for Gremlin's annoyance. I can sleep trough that tone if I ducked under the dubet and was planning on doing that, but Gremlins screams of "Turn that shit off" " what the heeeeel is wrong with you" "waaaaaaaaaaaa" made me reconsider and turn the phone alarm off. It was an early, cold saturday morning and already we could hear the noises of motorcycles going past our accommodation place. It was at this brisk morning time that the Gremlin had to take a shower in the freezing cold sowers outside the building. The ambient temperature as we found a little later was only 3 degrees north of zero, so that explains why the Gremlin could only treat Himself to a 5 minute shower.

By the time we got ready, packed, I had lubed my chain it was coming close to 6am and we were planning to be doing the TT2000 starting at 0600. Rocked up to the gas station where we bumped into a few riders, exchanged greetings. I asked if they were also doing the TT2000 same as us. The answer was "Yes", followed by a rather unmotivated " I have no idea why the hell I'm doing it tho". I would have taught that the adventure, challenge, adrenalin, being part of something that 150 other people are passionate about, riding some of the best motorbike roads on the planet and the satisfaction of personal achievement would have been enough of a reason for that guy. I guess not everyone was seeing as much \in this event as was Gremlin and Myself.

6:10 - We are on the road. Route for me for today was as follows: Christchurch > Rakaia > Methven > Kumara > Blackball > Ikamatua > Karamea > Motueka > Nelson. We were traveled down to Rakaiana with Gremlin leading me. Got to the sign, took our pictures and off he went in the pusuit of his silver award, leaving by myself in the middle of the south island to combat the lements

I found the turn off to Methven ok, even tho it took me 3 circles trough a gas station, pavement, grass and another street, all done under the observant eyes of other participants in the TT2000 who had stopped in the said gas station to have a cup of coffee and warm up. Got the Methven where I met the folks on the trike and a bunch of other rider, and by their words, they were even more lost than I was. You see at that point in time, Gremlin had talked my sense of orientation down so much that I taught I must be the most lost planet in the south island are at that point in time. Turns out that he (and Sharry) were wrong and there were people who were more lost than me. That made me feel a bit better

Left Methven at something like 7:10 and took to the road to Kumara, which was going trough Arthur's pass. My self contol was tested again coming up to the mountainous areas as it was mainly riding in a straigh line for probably 30-40kms. About 10kms before the road started getting interesting (and cold) I stopped, to fill up with gas, and put on all the available layers of clothing I could including my wets. At the gassy I met more of the tour's participants including Shadowjack. At that point I had stated to feel the limitations of the comfort of the stock seat of my bike and was admiring his sheepskin saddle. Really cool I saw a person who was doing the TT2000, who I taught was terribly underdressed for the occasion - summer gloves, jeather jacket with a t-shirt underneath and kevlar jeans and boots. I taught - you either have big balls or a small brain buddy - given that it was about to get colder real soon Filled up and god psyched for the trip ahead and the fun part was only beginning.

Started my going towards the mountainous terrain which had a few straights on which we were all behaving, and sure enough there were two Smurfs with their Smurfmobiles on the side of the road who were looking for prey. I wasn't it, but I did a nice long stare from them seeing that I was on a super loud bike, super loaded with luggage, bike green in colour while I was wearing day glow high visibility pants and day glow high visibility jacket (my wets) and I had the other 3-4 layers underneath. I'm sure I must have awaken curiosity in their Smurfy brains looking like marshmallow dipped in construction site paint soundling like Boeing 747 in reverse thrust

Got going trough Arthur's pass, passing a number of camper vans full with polish tourists. The roads were very nice and people were letting us bikes pass easy. There was some black Ice on the road at some parts due to it being an early morning, but nothing to major. At about 3/4 of the way to Kumara, while enjoying a nice touring pace trough the sweepers I got passes by a dude on a blue SV1000 and his friend on a red adventure bike of some sort. Those guys were riding their bike up to 100% of their capabilities, knew the roads well it seems and were doing twis my speed in the sweepers (well deep into licence loosing speeds). It was interesting to see how other riders were having fun from one side and hoping I don't find them behind some bend - stationary. Got to Kumara and took my photo of the sign as a proof that I had been there. The first straigh out of the town I see the SV boy and his buddy on the side of the road. Stationery. Lucky for them they were talking to a Smurf. Turns out that SV boy and his buddy were too enthusiastic on the throttle and unknowingly (of knowingly) gotten them selfs all the way to the forest of lost licenses. needless to say I didn't see them again.

Got to Greymouth and filled up before going to Blackball and Ikamatua for the extra kms. Got on to the road for blackball and was nice to see soo many bikes on it. Turns out I was just in the mix of the main group of riders, some of which had just gotten their proof of ride to the towns and the rest who were just on their way. Everyone waved and behaved. Got the Blackball photo abd on another 30kms to Ihamatua. There were some nice straights between those two towns :devil: Got to Ikamatua, took clothes off (read riding gear), bought a biscuit as a proof I was in the town (the receipt) and proceeded to eat my cookie. Watched numerous bikes arrive in frtont of the Ikamatua Hotel sign, take picture and soot off. seeing that there was more than just a few bikes doing it, the locals got interested and by the 10th minute I was there eating my cookie, a small croud had gathered up to watch all the bikes coming up as in they were coming into a MotorGp pit stop, hopping off their bikes, taking a picture and shooting aways again in race pace. Some were even cheering them on. haha - simple pleasures in life. I finished my cookie and put my clothes back on (read riding gear), and left the same MotoGp style as the rest of the riders letting the bike get to the top of the rev range before shifting up. The was the slight downside of this action that there was a turn off to get back on route was only a few hundred meters away so as bikes accelerate MotoGp style they soon remember that they better brake MotoGp style if they want to make the turnoff. It was interesting that the turnoff was also over a crest and railway lines on top of that, so as riders were taking the turnoff and accelerating fast so the local can see, they had forgotten that the crest has a dip on the other side, thus causing the motorcycles' front wheel to experience a sudden elevation change related to seal level - no wonder the crowd had gathered

Proceeded mack to the main route, refilled at Greymouth with the amused gas station attendant who I had seen about an hour earlier and seeing her disbelief that I had covered 120 kms since I last saw her - not telling how long ago On the way to Karamea. Riding that west coast was just magic. I got my Mojo going there full on. Man and machine became one. The tarmac was moving underneath and the sense of flying and freedom was truly upon me. Big smile on my face. Magnificent. The corners to karamea are some of the most challenging I have had the pleasure to play on and it was fantastic to be able to do such an amazing piece of road on a dry and sunny day with heps of bikes around. It is a true must do for people who go to the south island riding. This is where I first saw the Gremlin, who at that point in time had overtaken me somehow and was already coming back from Karamea. Got a nice big wave out of him on I went to karamea. It was windy in that west coast though, and being on a naked bike it was a slight disadvantage to all those lazy boy chairs with wheels and screen - the Gold Wing. Ah well I spose everything has its own purpose.

Filled up at Westport, enjoyed a pie with some bikers also doing the TT2000 and on we went to karamea. SH6 is also one of the roads that if a rider is on the south island, is a must ride. Corner were flowing smoothly, the view was amazing. It was a point where even tho I could feel that I had already clocked about 700km was so much fun that fatigue did not really have a way to kick in. I'm guessing due to the adrenalin rush from the twisties.

By the time I got to Motueka It was about 6pm already. A stop at the gassy was in order to take on some fluids - both the bike and myself. A cold during went down really well after the got sun and the adrenalin had made me slightly warmed up. i think that the 3l ayers of clothing I was wearing had also something to do with it. I got to nelson about 7 pm but got to the checkpoint at about 8. That delay was due to slight detour in the town of Nelson, but it was nowhere near the same scale as the Christchurch detour the day before.

At 8am I was finally reunited with my KTM riding friend Gremin, who got immediately to teasing me about getting lost, being a honda rider, and so on and so on. Had started ti miss the honda jokes the whole day

In the night the Gremlin and I hot the town, and got in the mix of Hells Angels, police and horny Irish girls......but that is the subject to a different tale

Day 2 of the TT2000 was only a few hours away ...

[Shadowjack]

Nice write-up, Toto. And I have enjoyed Gremiln's as well.
You mention my sheepskin saddle. I have a confession - comfort for the TT2000 event (and the NI tour which preceded it) was immeasurably enhanced by the Airhawk strategically placed underneath, and camouflaged by, the sheepskin. I must have forgotten to mention it - you know, adrenalin/pressure of the event, etc, etc....