DONT MASTUREBATE!!

**John** · 27th May 2005, 07:49

Ok who killed my cat?

**Sniper** · 27th May 2005, 07:51

OK, sorry john, I had to, the girlfriend is giving me the cold shoulder at the moment

**John** · 27th May 2005, 07:52

Originally Posted by Sniper

OK, sorry john, I had to, the girlfriend is giving me the cold shoulder at the moment

Ok, that’s fine just direct your sexual urges to another cat or small (fluffy) animals please!

**Sniper** · 27th May 2005, 07:54

I have just realised a bad pun and my avatar and custom user title on this thread. Im sick!

**John** · 27th May 2005, 07:55

Originally Posted by Sniper

I have just realised a bad pun and my avatar and custom user title on this thread. Im sick!

Dont worry, we all erm.. no we dont - your sick goto a doctor.

**ManDownUnder** · 27th May 2005, 08:52

... ahem... ok ok - I'll provide the lyrics - you lot sing along...

DAD:
There are Jews in the world.
There are Buddhists.
There are Hindus and Mormons, and then
There are those that follow Mohammed, but
I've never been one of them.

I'm a Roman Catholic,
And have been since before I was born,
And the one thing they say about Catholics is:
They'll take you as soon as you're warm.

You don't have to be a six-footer.
You don't have to have a great brain.
You don't have to have any clothes on. You're
A Catholic the moment Dad came,

Because

Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.

CHILDREN:
Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.

GIRL:
Let the heathen spill theirs
On the dusty ground.
God shall make them pay for
Each sperm that can't be found.

CHILDREN:
Every sperm is wanted.
Every sperm is good.
Every sperm is needed
In your neighbourhood.

MUM:
Hindu, Taoist, Mormon,
Spill theirs just anywhere,
But God loves those who treat their
Semen with more care.

MEN:
Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
WOMEN:
If a sperm is wasted,...
CHILDREN:
...God get quite irate.

PRIEST:
Every sperm is sacred.
BRIDE and GROOM:
Every sperm is good.
NANNIES:
Every sperm is needed...
CARDINALS:
...In your neighbourhood!

CHILDREN:
Every sperm is useful.
Every sperm is fine.
FUNERAL CORTEGE:
God needs everybody's.
MOURNER #1:
Mine!
MOURNER #2:
And mine!
CORPSE:
And mine!

NUN:
Let the Pagan spill theirs
O'er mountain, hill, and plain.
HOLY STATUES:
God shall strike them down for
Each sperm that's spilt in vain.

EVERYONE:
Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is good.
Every sperm is needed
In your neighbourhood.

Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite iraaaaaate!

MDU

**ManDownUnder** · 27th May 2005, 08:53

Originally Posted by John

Ok, that’s fine just direct your sexual urges to another cat or small (fluffy) animals please!

Anyone does a "pussy" joke and I promise to (pretend to be) disgusted!

MDU

**John** · 27th May 2005, 08:55

Originally Posted by ManDownUnder

... ahem... ok ok - I'll provide the lyrics - you lot sing along...

MDU

When I first saw that 10 billion years ago, I think I fainted laughing

I loved how all the kids like sung along and danced down the road, My favourite part is still the old dudes taking over the business and becoming accountant pirates

**ManDownUnder** · 27th May 2005, 09:13

Originally Posted by John

When I first saw that 10 billion years ago, I think I fainted laughing

I loved how all the kids like sung along and danced down the road, My favourite part is still the old dudes taking over the business and becoming accountant pirates

I like it too - reminds me - I have an accountant friend I need to buy that video for...!

He'd relate to it
MDU

**Enn** · 27th May 2005, 10:51

Originally Posted by Sniper

Im sure you have seen this before but...........

Please think of the kittens!........

**zadok** · 27th May 2005, 11:03

[QUOTE] Where are the Python fans> ManDownUnder
I used to like Monty Python.
What's the name of this song and was it from one of their movies?

**VeeFour** · 27th May 2005, 11:09

[QUOTE=zadok]

Where are the Python fans> ManDownUnder
I used to like Monty Python.
What's the name of this song and was it from one of their movies?

I think from memory its from their movie "The Meaning of Life"? Also has the classic restaurant skit with the exploding man....."just one more wafer thin mint sir?"