The logic of a child.....

[Odin]

Some reasons not to mess with children.
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A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale
To swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its
throat was very small. The little girl said, "But,Jonah was swallowed
by a
whale Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not
swallow
a human; it was physically impossible
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask
Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
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A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of
children
while
they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each
child's work.

As she got to one little girl who was working diligently,
she
asked
what the drawing was.

The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God
Looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing,
The girl:replied, "They will in a minute."
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The children had all been photographed, and the teacher
was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up
and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a
doctor.' A small voice at the back of the room said,"And there's The
teacher,she's dead."
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A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to
make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head,
the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the
face."

"Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am
standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my
feet?" A little fellow put his hand up and said, "Cause your feet aren't
empty."
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The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic Elementary
school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God
is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of
the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had
written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.

[Odin]

An elderly couple went to breakfast at a restaurant where the "seniors'
special" was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for $1.99.

"Sounds good," the wife said. "But I don't want the eggs."

"Then I'll have to charge you two dollars and forty-nine cents because
you're ordering a la carte," the waitress warned her.

"You mean I'd have to pay for not taking the eggs?" the wife asked
incredulously. "I'll take the special."

"How do you want your eggs?" asked the waitress.

"Raw and in the shell," the wife replied. She took the two eggs home.