Gear threads.
Tell your accident story threads.
Replacing suspension components with chicken drumsticks threads.
Lubricating chains with petrol threads.
Dynamo fuel additive will make your bike run better and more economically.
They come and go.
In 20 years of watching people crash and burn you see some pretty dumb stuff.
But there are constants.
So, some observations:
- Male motorcyclists aren't ready to have their riding capabilities and habits reviewed until they've been hurt badly and are a minimum of 40 years of age.
- Female motorcyclists of any age invariably seek out the most battered male motorcyclist they can find for help on surviving in traffic, slow speed handling tips, and lessons on how to pick a bike up.
- Male motorcyclists under 24 know everything there is to know about riding a bike.
- Female motorcyclists never arrive at their destination with a 0 blink rate, soaked in perspiration, or tell tales of near misses. They arrive 30 seconds after the leading gaggle of males under 40. Then order sensible salads and drink lots of water, and maybe one coffee. Not 6 pies, three beers and 4 espressos.
Worry about your own stuff. I couldn't care less if someone is wearing a push bike helmet, jandals, a thong, and a bikini top while riding a scooter. Except to have a bloody good ogle, providing the rider meets basic ogling standards. I'm over 40 so those standards pretty much mean female and no moustache.
- If you're a bloke complaining about someone riding like an idiot you are a stinking hypocrite. Shut up. Nobody cares about your new found evangelistic fervor for "road safety".
- If you're a bloke under 24, stay away from the people over 40. They've had their fill of organising trailers, ringing ambulances and parents/girlfriends, and listening to you babble about how brilliant it would have been if you could have just pulled off the massif overtake while wheelying, while they apply pressure to two major arteries and try to stop you moving the leg with two compound fractures of the femur.
- If you're a bloke under 24, you're going to get lectured about your riding "habits". Shut up and listen. If you don't agree or it makes you angry THEN THE PERSON TELLING YOU OFF IS 100% RIGHT ABOUT YOUR KNOBBISH BEHAVIOUR.
- If you're a woman on a group ride, for God's sake, take charge and deploy a Female lead rider, and a female tail-end Charlie.
- If some people are trying to help make the road a safer place for you and you aren't prepared to help in any way, Shut up. Conversely, if you have an opposing view, make sure it is backed up with better facts than those uttered by a third cousin's best mate who used to shag a woman who worked at the counter of the AA in Kaitaia.
- Robert Taylor knows more about suspension than some bloke who runs a website from Latvia and purports to come from Florida. If Robert says it's wrong, it IS wrong.
Riding bikes isn't a religion. Very few people are going to conform to your idea of the "perfect rider", so for goodness sakes let it go unless someone asks you for help. If you don't know, say so.
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Originally Posted by Jim2
). When I bought the Blackbird, I KNEW that I'd either be emptying my wallet on a regular basis to support state coffers, or more worryingly; end up dead as I simply wasn't good enough to ride it well. Swallowed pride and enrolled on an advanced 1:1 course with the ex-chief instructor of the M.O.T, Ward Fischer. Ego at rock bottom after an hour (not the instructor's fault), and the rest of the course was sublime. Still alive and maybe making a reasonable fist of riding. That course genuinely turned my riding round 5 years ago.
:no
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