Memorable KB quotes

[riffer]

wikipedia says:

Eddo André Brandes (born 5 March 1963, Port Shepstone, KwaZulu-Natal, South Africa) is a former Zimbabwean cricketer who played in 10 Tests and 59 ODIs from 1987 to 1999, spanning four World Cups. In the days when a number of Zimbabwe's players were amateurs with other full-time professions, Brandes was a chicken farmer.
He took a hat-trick in an ODI against England in January 1997 that is still regarded as the highest in terms of total average of the batsmen dismissed.^[1] Only two months short of his 34th birthday, he remains the oldest player to have taken an ODI hat-trick.
He gained fame for his noted and oft quoted exchange with Glenn McGrath, after McGrath gets frustrated at being unable to dismiss Brandes. The bowler asked: "Why are you so fat?" to which Brandes replied: "Because every time I fuck your wife she gives me a biscuit."^[2] As of 2003 Brandes had moved to Australia to pursue a coaching career, and was formerly coaching the Sunshine Coast Scorchers who play in the XXXX Gold Brisbane Grade Competition. He now runs a tomato farm on the Sunshine Coast.[1]

[pritch]

Pommie cricket team. It was aimed at Shane Warne.

Further checking indicates my memory is at fault (not for the first time):

Glenn McGrath v Eddo Brandes
McGrath was bowling to the Zimbabwe number 11 - who was unable to get his bat anywhere near the ball.

McGrath, frustrated that Brandes was still at the crease, wandered up during one particular over and inquired: "Why are you so fat?"

Quick as a flash, Brandes replied: "Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit."

Shane Warne was the target of another one. As one of the English batsmen came to the crease for the first time in a series, a portly Warne said to him, "Ive been looking forward to this all winter."

"It looks like you spent the whole time eating". came the reply

[Maha]

From a ''smelly glove'' thread Owl responded to an undies analogy with...

''Not quite the same thing Maha. It's not normal to have "cheese 'n' chocolate" in your gloves''