To the motorcyclists of New Zealand - a letter from Nick Smith

[shrub]

Dear Motorbicyclists, you will no doubt be aware that when we took over New Zealand from those naughty people in the Labour government ACC was in such a bad way it was on the verge of collapsing and quite probably bringing our economy with it. Something urgent needed to be done.

We looked at every option, and we had no choice but to increase your levies, and while some of you were the teensiest bit upset at the time, your sacrifice has paid off. Less than 2 years later we have not just turned a $4.8 billion deficit around, but for the last 2 years we have returned $2.5 bn in surpluses. If you vote us back in again (why would you not, we're on your side?) we will drop every New Zealander's workplace levies by over $3.00 a week! My good friend Mr Key wants everyone to think that this is a demonstration of our economic mastery, and that we will soon be applying it to the rest of the economy, and that horrid Mr Goff is trying to make people think we were telling porkies, but you and I know that it was you who saved the day for ACC.

I understand that some of you still resent paying your new registration, but it's for the greater good and I'm sure you'll be good boys and girls and keep paying, and maybe one day I might drop my, oops, I meant your car registration costs as a reward.


Your loving uncle Nick.

[hayd3n]

cheers nick ya dick
the motorcyclist acc adds up to how much a year?
surplus? but we already told you that
i voted bill and ben and ill vote for them again if i can

[Usarka]

Dear Nick.

I haven't paid my registration in over 8 months. I hope this doesn't upset your budgeting and leave you with yet another deficit.

Lick my balls.
Usarka.

[Banditbandit]

Dear Motorbicyclists, you will no doubt be aware that when we took over New Zealand from those naughty people in the Labour government ACC was in such a bad way it was on the verge of collapsing and quite probably bringing our economy with it. Something urgent needed to be done.

We looked at every option, and we had no choice but to increase your levies, and while some of you were the teensiest bit upset at the time, your sacrifice has paid off. Less than 2 years later we have not just turned a $4.8 billion deficit around, but for the last 2 years we have returned $2.5 bn in surpluses. If you vote us back in again (why would you not, we're on your side?) we will drop every New Zealander's workplace levies by over $3.00 a week! My good friend Mr Key wants everyone to think that this is a demonstration of our economic mastery, and that we will soon be applying it to the rest of the economy, and that horrid Mr Goff is trying to make people think we were telling porkies, but you and I know that it was you who saved the day for ACC.

I understand that some of you still resent paying your new registration, but it's for the greater good and I'm sure you'll be good boys and girls and keep paying, and maybe one day I might drop my, oops, I meant your car registration costs as a reward.


Your loving uncle Nick.

Dear Nick Smith - You can go get FUCKED !!!!

[shrub]

Dear Nick Smith - You can go get FUCKED !!!!

Ouch, that's cruel! Poor Nick, he deserves better from you ungrateful, dangerous motorbicyclists.

[imdying]

Hope he gets burgled... oh, wait...

[Indiana_Jones]

"And I hope your mother dies in a freak yachting accident."

....Wibble

-Indy

[Crasherfromwayback]

Dear Nick Smith,

I hope you get that horrible nasty flesh eating disease on your ball sack. If you have one.

[Scuba_Steve]

"And I hope your mother dies in a freak yachting accident."

....Wibble

-Indy

Dear Nick Smith,

I hope you get that horrible nasty flesh eating disease on your ball sack. If you have one.

for the right price, it could happen

[Deano]

The end of the letter should read - you bikers still don't pay enough and you're being subsidised by car drivers. (This is basically what he said in his levy reduction speech)

So expect to be reamed again when they next review the levies.

[Colapop]

Bikers were always gonna be charged higher acc levies - the gubbermint is just trying to make up for the lack of petrol tax it can't collect from us. It used to be Lockwood's myth now it's Nick's myth!!

[yungatart]

Dear Mr Smith
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your groin...and may your arms be too short to reach...

Kind regards

[DrunkenMistake]

Im voting some shitty outcast party to insure my vote gets waisted.
What a ball bag.

[Maha]

Dear Nick,
Your undestanding nature and caring way is nothing short of shit piss fuck cunt cocksucker motherfucker and tits.
Please accept the shirt off my back as a token of my thankfullness for your generosity.



Arsehole

[shrub]

My concern is that slippery Nick and smiley John will think "hmmm... raising levies for motorcyclists got ACC out of trouble, what happens if we raise them again? Will the economy suddenly start running a surplus?"

I would never in a hundred thousand brazillian years suggest such decent, honest, true-blue men like John and Nick would have bullshitted us about the state of the ACC books, for that would be a slippery slope - what else might they have told us that wasn't quite as it orter be? .