Child abuse: when the FUCK are we going to actually take this seriously?

[oneofsix]

Of course women have got to play their part (not blaming them of course) and NOT hanging out with loonies...

http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/crim...ied-to-tow-bar

FFS - you would think they would know better?

http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/6051...with-prisoners

For the first one there is the battered wife syndrome, I think basically they have such low self esteem and are so down trodden they can't see an alternative and/or think that even if they 'escape' he will get them.

As for the second, frigging looneys. Guess it might be the missed placed mothering instinct and they somehow think they will change the crims, what woman doesn't think she will change her man?

I agree the woman and society, even at scum level, need to change attitudes. As I've said before we have changed our attitude to drink driving since I was a child, we are changing our attitude to child discipline, most of the way there for most of the people now, but there will always be those few that require the assistance of a high velocity lead pallet to make them better citizens.

[Paul in NZ]

You can have all the policies and theories in the world but with animals like this about we have not got a show.

http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/6082...ot-near-parade

Gee - related to the Glassies eh?

[riffer]

I personally think that the only way you are really going to make any headway with this issue is to do something that's going to upset a lot of people.

• Introduce a form of "National Standards" for childcare.
• Introduce constant and consistent monitoring of ALL families and hold ALL infringers to account. Start a league of tables for parenting results and compare EVERYBODY.
• Remove children from at risk families and rehouse with infertile couples who are prepared to make a difference
• Report on what's actually happening; make it totally transparent.

A few problems I can see with this. Firstly, no-one will like this amount of infringement in our lives. Hell, I don't even like what I'm suggesting. Secondly, it's hugely expensive. Thirdly, it sends out the message that NONE of us can be trusted. We hated the anti-smacking law and this is 100-fold harsher. Fourthly, do we have people with the competencies to drive this?

But I think to fix this problem we need to change our priorities. Either our children are THE MOST important thing in our society or they are not.

Please discuss.

[riffer]

Well, that killed the conversation...

[JimO]

lets face it we know who are the worst offenders, put them under the microscope, stop paying for them to have more babies

[hayd3n]

i frmly believe that they should just pay $2000 to anyone wishing to go and get sterilised
imagine the millions saved in welfare and the idiots stoopid enough to take it

[shrub]

Tomorrow I am attending a family group conference over a couple of kids that look like they are being abused by their mother's partner. One of them is my partner's brother's son, and the other is that kid's half brother. Now here's the interesting bit: My partner's brother M realised there were problems very early in the piece, and over the last 12 months has spent over $50k fighting to get custody of his kid, and the best he could get was 50/50. The other kid's father didn't have the money, so went broke before being completely shut out of his son's life.

Over the last 12 months there have been a huge number of warning signs, and my partner's family have done everything they could to get the kid out but the system is so biased towards the mother that even though she was living in a shithole, a car with no WOF and wasn't providing even basic needs the default was 100% custody to her. M has a good job, his own home, a supportive family and is a committed father.

If M didn't have the financial ability and support to fight for his kid I suspect that one or both kids would be tomorrow's headlines.

[oneofsix]

[*]Introduce a form of "National Standards" for childcare.

Please discuss.

remember when Plunket was financed to this level and all kids were by default Plunket kids.

[MSTRS:Me]

There certainly was a lot to recommend that system. What mother was going to 'go up against' one of Plunket's battle-scarred dragons?
No - either the mother did what she was told - or else.
That, or use the District Nurse who called at the house and were generally closer to human...
Either way, the 'state' was watching.

[riffer]

I was a Plunket kid.

I was gutted when they killed Plunket off.

[thecharmed01]

Who killed off Plunket?
Why do people keep saying that when Plunket are still going fine.
I'm on the Island Bay Plunket Committee and my son (Mr 3) has seen Plunket for all of his Well Child Health visits. They used to come to me, but then as he got older I opted to come to them but even now for his 4 year check I can get them to come to me if I choose.
Plunket are awesome when you get a good Plunket nurse, but they can be really awful if you strike a bad one, like anything.



I wasn't going to read this thread as I get so angry about all the abuse cases and infanticides in New Zealand and it makes me want to hurt people. I don't understand how ANYONE can inflict pain on a child willfully. I just don't get it.

But then reading this article here tonight made me so so angry that I want to drive up there and take those babies myself!!!
This stupid "little girl" who is far too young and immature to be a mother, has 3 children and is pregnant with #4 whilst still drinking and carrying on like a 15 year old (as seen on her public Facebook page)
She sent her 5-year-old girl to school smelly, hungry, riddled with head lice, open sores and suffering scabies day after day, with the school telling her to get her daughter help every day, to the piont where the child started walking home alone as Mummy hadn't arrived (likely too embarrassed by the school's comments) to collect her.
She complained about having no lunch... having eaten no breakfast... having had no dinner the night before....
She's 5 years old!!! She shouldn't have to worry about that!
I don't understand why those children are allowed to live with her! Why does she get chance after chance when the school (good on them btw) told her over and over she needed to help her little girl get well!
It's heartbreaking. And her gloating on Facebook makes me want to slap her!

[Woodman]

Thinkin outside of the square, I just thought of a great way to get the gummint to come down hard on this and sort it out.

Start a tourism style marketing campaign aimed at our biggest overseas customers that tells the story like it is. How the leaders of NZ don't give a fuck, how children are starving, hooked on drugs, abused and murdered. You get the idea.
Pretty sure there would be enough like minded individuals who would freely give up their time and expertise to conjur up such a campaign, hell they wouldn't even need to action it, just discreetly show it to the powers that be as a form of bribery.

Its $$$ talking, thats what they understand.

[Winston001]

I personally think that the only way you are really going to make any headway with this issue is to do something that's going to upset a lot of people.

• Introduce a form of "National Standards" for childcare.
• Introduce constant and consistent monitoring of ALL families and hold ALL infringers to account. Start a league of tables for parenting results and compare EVERYBODY.
• Remove children from at risk families and rehouse with infertile couples who are prepared to make a difference
• Report on what's actually happening; make it totally transparent.

Totally agree.

So far, no government has the courage to take such drastic steps. Also as you point out we probably do not have enough trained people to do the interventions.

What we do need to happen is a national conversation on dysfunctional families and that will have to be carried out by the media. Quite how it gets kick-started I do not know. A charismatic politician could do it but would need courage and support from other leaders.

[oneofsix]

Thinkin outside of the square, I just thought of a great way to get the gummint to come down hard on this and sort it out.

Start a tourism style marketing campaign aimed at our biggest overseas customers that tells the story like it is. How the leaders of NZ don't give a fuck, how children are starving, hooked on drugs, abused and murdered. You get the idea.
Pretty sure there would be enough like minded individuals who would freely give up their time and expertise to conjur up such a campaign, hell they wouldn't even need to action it, just discreetly show it to the powers that be as a form of bribery.

Its $$$ talking, thats what they understand.

another 'Once were warriors' warts and all type movie? Or a TV series, Law and Order style based on Police and social services trying to do something about child abuse but coming up against the wall of silence etc that protects and enables the abuser?

[FJRider]

Thinkin outside of the square, I just thought of a great way to get the gummint to come down hard on this and sort it out.

But the goverment passed a LAW against child abuse ... didn't they ... ???

Administer a lead pill to the offending parent ... merely on suspicion if necessary ... (even if you get the wrong one ... no great loss to society)

Abuse would stop smartly afterwards ...