Epic Trademe thread - R18 neighbour

**SMOKEU** · 24th January 2012, 22:27

I've recently moved into a new house and I absolutely love it. The area is great and it has a fantastic huge deck for entertaining...
Only problem is that the deck is right next to my neighbours spa pool. We were having a BBQ recently, and we were winding down having our last drink before heading in doors when we heard huffing and puffing, from the neighbours. We looked over and he and his wife were having sex in the spa. We are no prudes (lets get that straight) and I assumed that he didn't know we were out there and waited for them to realise and stop. But it continued on until we had to move indoors.
Hoping this was a one off occasion - we didn't think too much of it. Well tried not to anyway - they aren't no oil paintings...)
We couldn't have been more wrong.
5 times now while cooking in the kitchen (our window looks over into the neighbours ) I have been confronted with our neighbours "going at it" on their dining room table. One particular occasion he looked over at me and gave me the thumbs up.
I now cook with the blinds down.
The deck doesn't get much use either - as I can't bear running the risk of having my book group witnessing this behaviour.

I dont know what to do - and it is one of those situations where I don't feel that comfortable confronting them about it. We are not talking about an over an grown fruit tree here.....
His wife seems rather conservative and we have had a few awkward situations in the supermarket.
HELP ME - Does anyone else have problems with exhibitionist neightbours?

http://www.trademe.co.nz/Community/M...938974&topic=5

**Ender EnZed** · 24th January 2012, 22:31

Fucked if I'm reading a TradeMe thread.

This one is worthless without pics.

**ducatilover** · 24th January 2012, 23:10

I'm off for a BBQ then

**Gremlin** · 25th January 2012, 01:57

Can't believe I read the whole thing... no pictures... must be bored.

Did like some of the comments like score cards, acting like David Attenborough etc. Mature side (perhaps portion... it's very small) says write a note, put in letterbox, see what happens.

Meh.

**EJK** · 25th January 2012, 02:10

Whoah, Trademe's got a forum??? I just found my new Interweb Playground

**Ender EnZed** · 25th January 2012, 02:29

Originally Posted by EJK

Whoah, Trademe's got a forum??? I just found my new Interweb Playground

It's comprised almost exclusively of people who ask stupid questions in Trademe auctions. You're probably going to be offered a bucket of flat batteries in exchange for your views on breastfeeding while on Facebook.

**avgas** · 25th January 2012, 06:12

Is "book club" a code word for a group of guys reading porn?

**SMOKEU** · 25th January 2012, 11:16

Originally Posted by EJK

Whoah, Trademe's got a forum??? I just found my new Interweb Playground

Yeah, the silly cunts banned me from that forum a few years ago. I'm still not allowed back.

Trolling on those forums are so easy that it takes the whole fun out of trolling.

**tigertim20** · 25th January 2012, 21:30

I have had the same thing happen smokeu haha. I actually had the lady who is the head of the trademe team ring me and have a go because I posted a link to 'the ten best and worst vagina tattoos' on the message board.
I kept her on the phone for over and hour winding her up, poor thing I think a blood vessel exploded in her head, but I digress...

Solution to the original problem, get a few mates around, next time they do it, all wander over (a grou of 7-8 big blokes should be sufficient,) and as you approach, start an argument loudly...
bloke1 Im gettin first run at her
bloke2 fuck off mate Im not stirring your spooge
bloke3 why dont ya just DP her
bloke1 well who'se getting her asshole?
bloke4 could do paper scissors rock?
bloke 5 nah, shes gonna get plenty of rock!! haha
bloke6 stop arguin ya buggers, we'll all get to fuck her
bloke2 yeah i suppose we can swap places for round 2.

with some luck, theyll shut the windows, lock the doors and not do it again.

**DrunkenMistake** · 25th January 2012, 21:33

Originally Posted by tigertim20

I have had the same thing happen smokeu haha. I actually had the lady who is the head of the trademe team ring me and have a go because I posted a link to 'the ten best and worst vagina tattoos' on the message board.
I kept her on the phone for over and hour winding her up, poor thing I think a blood vessel exploded in her head, but I digress...

Solution to the original problem, get a few mates around, next time they do it, all wander over (a grou of 7-8 big blokes should be sufficient,) and as you approach, start an argument loudly...
bloke1 Im gettin first run at her
bloke2 fuck off mate Im not stirring your spooge
bloke3 why dont ya just DP her
bloke1 well who'se getting her asshole?
bloke4 could do paper scissors rock?
bloke 5 nah, shes gonna get plenty of rock!! haha
bloke6 stop arguin ya buggers, we'll all get to fuck her
bloke2 yeah i suppose we can swap places for round 2.

with some luck, theyll shut the windows, lock the doors and not do it again.

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to tigertim20 again.