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Thread: Real estate jargon

  1. 29th May 2009, 12:50 #1
    Maha
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    Real estate jargon

    Buyers are not stupid....

    'Owner Moving'....
    Really? so thats why His house is on the market??

    'Has Potential'...
    This house needs about 80K thrown at it, over and above the asking price.

    'Vendor Wants it Sold'...
    Perhaps thats why they contacted you in the first place?

    'Character Filled Home'...
    Its creepy but, you'll get used to it.
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  2. 29th May 2009, 13:02 #2
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    Handyman's delight...

    ...About to fall down.

    Superb views...

    ...Incredibly steep section.

    Secluded...

    ...Leg-in section.
    Can I believe the magic of your size... (The Shirelles)
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  3. 29th May 2009, 13:09 #3
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    In an up-and-coming area
    = Otara is not that bad, surely.
    Do you realise how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?
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  4. 29th May 2009, 13:09 #4
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    price by negotiation its to expensive to list so we put this here to get you in for a looksey and once your wife falls in love with the place you have to buy it
    'Good things come to those who wait'
    Bollocks, get of your arse and go get it
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  5. 29th May 2009, 13:11 #5
    Maha
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    'Owner has run out of Money'

    DIY just aint what its cracked up to be, you'll need contractors.
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  6. 29th May 2009, 13:11 #6
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    Just available
    previous owner just died on the premises, hope you don’t believe in ghosts

    Wildlife nearby
    children and pets get ticks and fleas

    Must see inside
    the outside is ugly
    No body move... I dropped my brain
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  7. 29th May 2009, 13:12 #7
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    Location, location, location...

    ...Be prepared for a visit by the Residents Committee.

    Nature lover's delight...

    ...Good luck trying to tame this overgrown section.
    Can I believe the magic of your size... (The Shirelles)
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  8. 29th May 2009, 13:15 #8
    Maha
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    'More than meets the eye'

    Because, what actually meets the eye will make you snigger, but aren't those trees nice?
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  9. 29th May 2009, 13:19 #9
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    "Triple fronted cream brick charmer"

    WTF?
    "Standing on your mother's corpse you told me that you'd wait forever." [Bryan Adams: Summer of 69]
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  10. 29th May 2009, 13:20 #10
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    Deceased Estate...

    ...The family have scavenged the chattels, your job is to do something about the nicotine-stained ceilings.
    Can I believe the magic of your size... (The Shirelles)
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  11. 29th May 2009, 13:25 #11
    Maha
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    'Oppotunity Knocks'

    You wouldn't want to live here, best rent it out.
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  12. 29th May 2009, 13:29 #12
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    Cherished family home
    The carpets are fucked, the decor hasn't been touched since 1960, the (kids) bedroom windows are nailed shut
    Do you realise how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?
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  13. 29th May 2009, 13:32 #13
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    Sole Agency
    Add $10,000 to the price it should sell for.
    Do you realise how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?
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  14. 29th May 2009, 13:35 #14
    Maha
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    'Sky Views'

    No really, thats all you can see.
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  15. 29th May 2009, 13:36 #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maha View Post
    Buyers are not stupid....


    'Character Filled Home'...
    Its creepy but, you'll get used to it.
    Yes. In one example I looked at, it was referring to a toilet being present in the master bedroom... and I'm not talking an ensuite, this thing was in the middle of the room and had no walls
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