My writing

**idb** · 1st August 2005, 18:32

This is my only ever effort - it just so happens that I wrote it in fourth form and I think I got close to zero marks for it.
No accounting for taste I s'pose.

T'was a dark and dreary winter's night
The rain it was a'falling,
Yea, it was raining cats and dogs
The weather was appalling,
Through the dark a stranger peered, trying to find his way,
He fell into the river there, was drowned and swept away.

**Coyote** · 1st August 2005, 18:36

There once was a man from Nantucket....

**SPman** · 1st August 2005, 18:49

There was a young man from Mangaweka.

forgotten the rest

well. .

it was a long time ago

**placidfemme** · 2nd August 2005, 07:54

Originally Posted by yungatart

Do you know whats really cool - a 14 y/o kid and a gay female posting poetry on a bikers forum! You two rock- more power to ya!!

lol thank you

**placidfemme** · 2nd August 2005, 07:56

Originally Posted by XhardxcoreX

Nice work. The first one is awesome. They all are but the first is my fav.

Thanks, yeah I havn't written in about 2 years. That first one, was actually the first real poem thingy I'd ever written, unfortunatly it was the best, it's my number 1, and my number 2 is the last one I posted... I had a document with about 50+ pages of my poems on them... also got into lyric writting for a while... then I just stop... dunno why...

**hXc** · 2nd August 2005, 08:04

Originally Posted by placidfemme

Thanks, yeah I havn't written in about 2 years. That first one, was actually the first real poem thingy I'd ever written, unfortunatly it was the best, it's my number 1, and my number 2 is the last one I posted... I had a document with about 50+ pages of my poems on them... also got into lyric writting for a while... then I just stop... dunno why...

I say go for it. You have a real talent.

**vifferman** · 2nd August 2005, 08:14

Originally Posted by XhardxcoreX

Yeah I know but I am only 4th form. Give me a break man.

Fairy nuff. A break you say? Well, I did give you green bling instead of red...

**hXc** · 2nd August 2005, 08:18

Originally Posted by vifferman

Fairy nuff. A break you say? Well, I did give you green bling instead of red...

That was before I saw that bling bling. And thanks for it too

**hXc** · 4th October 2005, 12:02

Here's some newer stuff...

To Indulge...

Your eyes remind me of
A sandy beach in summer
When I can't see to the end
They seem to go on forever

Your smile reminds me of
A pink flower in spring
Surprises me at every moment
It is so beautiful

To indulge in your love
Oh, what happiness
That would bring
To my lonely heart

This next one I need some help with. I need an eight line stanza/verse to be the chorus. If you could just give me a guideline I can change it a little if you like. Thanks in advance.

Eternity

Wandering in darkness grope,
Finding not a glimpse of hope.
My fingers touch to find my way,
Each foot fall, my heart betrays
The fear which drives me through the day.
The fear which drives me through the day!

Suddenly the ground is lost,
Flailing arms as body's tossed.
Splashing down in a crimson pool,
The warm embrace is much too cruel,
I curse this lowly, wretched fool.
I curse this lowly, wretched fool!

Floundering in this self made hell,
Warmth increasing as I dwell,
Within the confines that I create,
Screaming as myself berate,
Giving in to this, my fate.
Giving in to this...my fate!

**InDeSkyz** · 4th October 2005, 13:32

hXc - I liked your hedgehog one

Couple I'd like to add... like, woteva like

Evil Teddy
====----====

Moulded with fibres of compassion
been happy and beloved
but now, limbs stretched and frail

Beady, calculating eyes
a loathsome smirk
all the hours of solitude,
resolved into deformities.

Teddy worn with age
Teddy pierced with pain

Nocturnal was Teddy with
thoughts of fearful revenge.

Teddy covered black ground,
treading around moonlight.
Devouring the covers,
he laboured towards life.

Teddy visible with tools and
uttering sounds of glee.
He easily brought death to his pray
and quickly forgot of thee.

Dismissing the moment,
he declined to the ground.
Returned to his floor space
still shaded and cold.

The cat hissing none
but harsh sounds.

Aging Home
====----====

slowness of time
advances
a rag tag of riches
relentless life

broken step
withered crutch
deadened soul
a cripple'd man

one moment,
aging, an eternity
the next,
one second, an infinity

tumbling with fear
nothing to defend
anticipation
a harsh embrace

a crush of pain
breathe spiritless
a stumble, not braved

no one acknowledges
turned backs,
shrunken old men

**hXc** · 6th October 2005, 14:21

Me and a mate just started a band and we have 2 originals so far. Written in one night. Here they are...

Dark Nights

Can't you see, I feel your pain
I'm waiting to see what you'll say.
Everytime you turn a leaf
The memories don't go away.
Do you think that I'm unfair?
I'm sorry but I learnt this way
Hiding the truth, and telling lies
Never seemed to cross my mind

Dark night shadows the moonlight
Which stops the red light
To tell you to halt
Dark night shadows the moonlight
Stoppin' the green light
To tell you to go
Dark night shadows the moonlight
Which stops the red light
To tell you to halt
Dark night, stoppin' all the lights
To tell you to go

Do you think I'm listening?
To a word, you don't have to say
You always told me time will heal
Well it's been a while, can't you tell?
Next time you want to talk to me
Pretend I'm there, 'cause I won't be
Follow the truth, and then you'll see
That you can't escape from reality

Dark night shadows the moonlight
Which stops the red light
To tell you to halt
Dark night shadows the moonlight
Stoppin' the green light
To tell you to go
Dark night shadows the moonlight
Which stops the red light
To tell you to halt
Dark night, stoppin' all the lights
To tell you to go [x3]

Escape the light

These people tell you what to do
You know that you don't want to
But you think that it's the thing to do

When they teach you things
They're brainwashing you
To the way they want you to consume
'Cause everytime they think you're a fool

You've got to escape the light
That you walked along with
Escape the light that brought you here
The light leads to everything you fear

These people that tell you what to believe
Don't want you to know
The truthful disease

They all know it
And you all show it
But you tell the people
That you don't agree

You've got to escape the light
That you walked along with
Escape the light that brought you here
The light leads to everything you fear [x2]

But if you escape the light
That you walked along with
And escape the light that brought you here
You'll find a new light
Better than the one here

**Riff Raff** · 6th October 2005, 15:52

You've got a lot of talent going on there Zac. Looking forward to hearing more of your songs. Got plans for another CD now you have a new singer for your band?

Edit: Oops I see you have a new band - are you still working with your old band or heading in a new direction?

**hXc** · 6th October 2005, 17:40

Originally Posted by Riff Raff

You've got a lot of talent going on there Zac. Looking forward to hearing more of your songs. Got plans for another CD now you have a new singer for your band?

Edit: Oops I see you have a new band - are you still working with your old band or heading in a new direction?

Umm not right at the moment because we have to learn all our old songs first then work on originals later. But it could happen.

Yes, I do have a new band. Yeah I'm still working with the other band. Just want something different as well.

**Riff Raff** · 6th October 2005, 18:17

Originally Posted by hXc

Umm not right at the moment because we have to learn all our old songs fist then work on originals later. But it could happen.

Yes, I do have a new band. Yeah I'm still working with the other band. Just want something different as well.

Crikey boy - when do you have time to do anything else like ride motorbikes or do your homework???