Appologies if this has been posted before, but it made me crack up so figured I would share . . .
A woman decides to have a face-lift for her birthday. She spends $5000 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper.
Before leaving she says to the clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?" "About 32," is the reply. "I'm exactly 47," the woman says happily.
A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the very same question. She replies, "I guess about 29." the woman replies, "Nope, I'm 47." Now, she's feeling really good about herself.
She stops in a chemist on her way down the street. She goes up to the
counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question. The
clerk responds, "Oh, I'd say 30." Again she proudly responds, "I am 47, but, thank you."
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man the same question. He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eye sight is going. Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then I can tell you exactly how old you are."
They wait in silence on the empty street until curiosity gets the best of her. She finally blurts out, "What the heck, go ahead."
He slips both of his hands under her blouse and under her bra and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. After a couple of minutes of this, she says, "Okay, okay,... how old am I?"
He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, "Madam, you are 47."
Stunned and amazed, the woman says, "That was incredible, how could you
tell?"
The old man replies, "Promise you won't get mad?"
"No", she says.
He replies, "I was behind you in the line at McDonald's."
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