You know the one... maybe ya don't, but yer sittin there with yer dinner (fush n chups) and you can start to smell various parts of your body over the smell of fish... the first and most obvious is the smell coming from ya joggers, balls, musky balls... not so bad, almost kinda tartar sauce so on with the food. Then the feet kick in, holy mother of god where the fuck did that come from... you could argue that at least it ain't musky balls from joggers that are in dire need of a wash but you can't be arsed takin them off when wifey does the wasshin. You just know that it's that time of the week.

Shower time! quick visit to the chamber of ideas so enure that the rest of the night goes smell free, on with the water, off with the clothes and dart into the shower... oooooo a tad hot, turn it down, we could be here for a while cause god damn that's nice. Homer (Simpson) noises droning through the bathroom as you blindly fumble for the soap with your face skywards enjoying the heat. On with the soap and wondering if the kids will miss the missus for 10 minutes oh hello. Then you start to get that tingle. You remember that a bath for one and a shower for the other two kids has already been sucked out of the tank and you're covered in soap standing on one foot and remember that wifey has indeed just put the washing on. No worries you think, you turn the knob (the one that adjusts the temperature) a little and figure you've got about a minute to a minute and a half before you're back to wondering where your penis went and keeping your nipples away from the glass... but the girls have been in the bath and the shower and that doesn't really click until you go from about 30 degrees to 0 kelvin in what seems the blink of an eye. Homer has suddenly turned into a howling monkey... no doubt the neighbours are wondering what the fuck is going on in yer bathroom as you hoot, crying out to god and screaming no no no... so it's off with the water and when you step out of the shower it's almost balmy in the rest of the bathroom.

The final thought before you give yourself third degree towel burns, I hope the beer next to the hot water tank isn't getting cold. The cold reality hits home, if the beers fucked it's your fault for having a shower on the same night the kids did ... lesson learned.......... again.