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Thread: things to ponder whilst waiting for the rugby

  1. #1
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    things to ponder whilst waiting for the rugby

    Old but still a laugh

    Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze
    these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

    Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat
    the next thing that comes outta it's bum."

    Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to
    a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

    Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

    Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't
    point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

    Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get
    undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

    Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

    Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

    If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? (This one kills me!!!!)

    If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables,
    then what is baby oil made from?

    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

    Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

    Stop singing and read on . . . . . .. . . . . you know you were!

    Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

    Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at
    you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

    Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
    .....is the answer

  2. #2
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    p/t answers

    Why was Victor Madfield allowed to play on?

    We're supposedly the best, why were we beaten?

    Al
    4 wheels move the body
    2 wheels move the soul

  3. #3
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    4th March 2004 - 20:17
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    Why does a shipment travel by car, and cargo travel by sea?

    Why do we park on the driveway and drive on parkways? (That one is probably more particular to our trans tasman cousins)

  4. #4
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    11th January 2005 - 09:53
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    Quote Originally Posted by forty two
    Old but still a laugh



    Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

    Stop singing and read on . . . . . .. . . . . you know you were!
    hahahahaha i did that... omg cant belive that...
    " If you even dream of beating me, you better wake up and apologise... "


    "I done wrassled with an alligator, I done tussled with a whale, Only last week I murdered a rock, Injured a stone, hospitalized a brick, I’m so mean I make medicine sick."

  5. #5
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    You wanna know whats funnier. Look at the page through this link

    http://sites.gizoogle.com/?url=http:...ad.php?t=15297
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by v.ros`
    hahahahaha i did that... omg cant belive that...
    lol I did that too... I never even realised they had the same tune...
    I'm not a complete idiot... some pieces are missing

    Quote Originally Posted by DingDong
    "Hi... I rang about the cats you have for sale..."..... "oh... you have children.... how much for the children?"

    mucho papoosa bueno no panocha

  7. #7
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    24th January 2005 - 15:45
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    Quote Originally Posted by placidfemme
    I never even realised they had the same tune...
    I did, but then I have two young children to whom I sing songs at night and I tend to go straight from twinkle twinkle to the alphbet song to "baa, baa Black Sheep" and back to twinkle twinkle.

    It's a very old tune. Mozart, at age 5, composed some variations on that tune.
    Motorbike Camping for the win!

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by forty two
    Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to
    a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
    Ours doesn't.
    But it's feckin expensive.
    ... and that's what I think.

    Or summat.


    Or maybe not...

    Dunno really....


  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sniper
    You wanna know whats funnier. Look at the page through this link

    http://sites.gizoogle.com/?url=http:...ad.php?t=15297

    Weird shit, mon...
    ... and that's what I think.

    Or summat.


    Or maybe not...

    Dunno really....


  10. #10
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    11th January 2005 - 09:53
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    hey so that makes three with the SAME tunes..

    alphabet song
    baa baa black sheep
    twinkle twinkle litte star...

    damn u learn new things everyday
    " If you even dream of beating me, you better wake up and apologise... "


    "I done wrassled with an alligator, I done tussled with a whale, Only last week I murdered a rock, Injured a stone, hospitalized a brick, I’m so mean I make medicine sick."

  11. #11
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    24th January 2005 - 15:45
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    Quote Originally Posted by v.ros`
    hey so that makes three with the SAME tunes..

    alphabet song
    baa baa black sheep
    twinkle twinkle litte star...
    Or, as my oldest would say:

    A B Hee
    heep
    Dar sky

    And he can sing along with bits of "A B Hee" and "Dar sky"

    Other things you may not know are that "Chitty Bang Bang", "Rainbow Connection" and "Patrick McGinty's Goat" are all lullabys (well, they are in our house)
    Motorbike Camping for the win!

  12. #12
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    My favourite: " Currently Active Nigga Spendin' This Thread: 1"
    Quote Originally Posted by skidMark View Post
    if you have a face afterwards well... that depends how you act...

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