Fathers beware - don't cuddle or play with your kids in public!

[PrincessBandit]

On the net this afternoon:


Some 300 people are enjoying hot summer days at McKee Domain near Ruby Bay as a father is at the playground with his daughters.

It is a classic Kiwi setting, with happy campers, barbecues and children playing.

Then comes something out of place, a police constable asking questions. The idyllic illusion is shattered.

Strangers claim to have seen the man, in broad daylight, behaving inappropriately with a girl.

The campers report this to the reserve caretaker who informs the police.

The allegations include kissing, rubbing her bottom and allowing the 10-year-old to rub his thigh and chest.

The flabbergasted man says he didn't do anything wrong, the daughter named as his victim says he didn't, and his wife says he didn't.

They cannot be identified for legal reasons although they would be happy to be.

The father said even as the constable questioned him at the campground, one of the three daughters jumped up and kissed him, and poked her finger through a small hole in his shirt saying "tickle, tickle".

It was an example of the type of behaviour the campers must have seen, but there was nothing wrong with it, he said.

Police did not take any action then and the family laughed about the misunderstanding, until police came knocking on their door three months later, in March last year.

Since then the police have pursued the case. Even when two justices of the peace threw it out, the police went to the High Court to get the charges relaid.

This is only the first few paragraphs of the article, but geez can't we all see that men are only going to get even more paranoid about their behaviour around kids - even their own!!! - if this kind of shit is going to start happening. Not unsurprisingly high profile cases of abuse make even the most mild mannered playing come under scrutiny when members of the public feel compelled (by law) to report any "suspicious behaviour" for fear of getting in the shit themselves for not "coming forward" or "doing the right thing" on the remote chance that a child might be being molested.

I don't see how we are going to get out of this hole that is being dug for society whereby "normal" playing behaviour is suddenly being viewed with suspicion and distrust. What an apparent travesty of justice that the police have caused such grief probably so they don't get accused of some sort of negligence.

[Mom]

We live in a sick, PC, gone mad world! This is the continuance of the castration of men in regard to their children. I know situations where a father has stopped bathing his little girls for fear of being accused of molesting them. Fathers who wont tuck their kids into bed at night, fathers who wont toilet his kids. How unfair and damaging to the father child relationship if simple personal parenting is denied them. It makes me very, very sad to read this sort of thing. Here we are as a society horrified about child violence, and on the flip side seemingly horrified by affectionate fathers playing whith his kids.

Some people, the police included need to actually stop, take a deep breath and re-evaluate priorities.

[mashman]

I suppose I better stop throwing my girls over my shoulder and biting their arse then. It is sad that public displays of affection are being weeded out of society and I'd go all social engineering conspiracy theory with teachers not being able to give kids a hug to sooth them, kids not being allowed to hug or shake hands in the playground, and any other form of detachment that authority dream up to avoid the possible risk of legal ramifications... but it'd serve next to no purpose even though that seems to be the way we're going. The future looks to be man and wife creating a baby in a test tube after having their personality's scrutinised over the first 30 years of their life before being granted a license to have kids as long as they're reared in strict bubble conditions by the book and only ever told to harden the fuck up or fear losing their license. It's a nasty way to look at it, but where does the sort of thinking end where physical contact becomes socially unacceptable?

[Edbear]

Makes me wonder about cuddling my baby Grandson in public!

[FJRider]

Even "Pillars of Society" can be deluded in their thinking ... they are doing the right thing.

More often than not ... those same "Pillars of Society" don't want to have their names known ... or to be linked to the reporting.

[Subike]

This is the reason I dont visit my own grandchildren, their grand mother has such a hate session on me , which has poisoned my daughter in laws mind, that even being in the same room for me is now a risk. I am not going over the top either. accusations have already been suggested!
It is also the reason I am still a single person, I dare not risk a relationship where children, (especially girls) are involved, or grandchildren.
One difference of opinion and I could be accused of something......Safer being single and hiring a girl once a month. Least Im safe.
Such is the price of our society,

[Oakie]

And be careful if you take your grandaughter to the playground and take photos of her playing. (Don't ask me how I know.)

[Subike]

And be careful if you take your grandaughter to the playground and take photos of her playing. (Don't ask me how I know.)

That would be asking for an instant 5 year prison sentence, and then released to a state house on prison property!

[Woodman]

Yea read that article in the paper tonight. I feel sorry for the guy and yes its a PC gone mad world but this case is another example of the Police going after a conviction instead of the truth. There were so many witnesses that offered support to the guy but the police just ignored them. The witnesses that they did listen to, to support the prosecution couldn't even agree on what the girl was wearing or her height, but STILL the police went ahead with a prosecution.

[FROSTY:Me]

My reaction to that--THEY CAN ALL GO FUCK THEMSELVES AND THEIR DIRTY MINDS.
Tell me I can't cuddle my kids and brother you got a war on your hands.
Seriously folks WE are society.Its up to us to make it clear we don't accept the ravings of some dirty minded pervert.

[Mom]

I suppose I better stop throwing my girls over my shoulder and biting their arse then.

I used to tell my kids openly, if they continued what they were doing I was going to snap their arms and legs off and beat them to death with them. Dont you dare stop biting bums!

Makes me wonder about cuddling my baby Grandson in public!

Dont FFS stop! Honestly this is madness.

I am not going over the top either. Least Im safe.
Such is the price of our society,

Your poor bastard. I honestly can not understand where the hell we went wrong.

And be careful if you take your grandaughter to the playground and take photos of her playing. (Don't ask me how I know.)

Photos are another thing altogether. Sad shit!

but STILL the police went ahead with a prosecution.

Imagine though, if some sort of abuse was happening and they did nothing? Rock and Hard place anyone?

What the hell is the solution?

[yod]

My reaction to that--THEY CAN ALL GO FUCK THEMSELVES AND THEIR DIRTY MINDS.
Tell me I can't cuddle my kids and brother you got a war on your hands.
Seriously folks WE are society.Its up to us to make it clear we don't accept the ravings of some dirty minded pervert.

you cuddle your brother?

[Edbear]

you cuddle your brother?

Well not cuddle, more like hug, but I do for sure, brother, son, sons-in-law, close friends! Cuddling is reserved for grandsons and Mrs. Bear...

[Tigadee]

I think people who are against public [or any] displays of affection by fathers for their children must have been deprived of that as children, and so out of jealousy and spite, create such a hateful bitter atmosphere of puritanical handicapping of fathers...

I wonder what they'll think of the dutch culture of family members kissing each other on the lips?

[mashman]

And be careful if you take your grandaughter to the playground and take photos of her playing. (Don't ask me how I know.)

I was stunned with this 4 years ago in the UK. We took my 4 and my 2 nieces to one of them thar indoor gym places. Popped out the camera and started taking pics of the kids having fun and was told that I wasn't allowed to. I got a might tad pissed off and had a chat with the supervisor asking if they could explain their use of surveillance cameras to watch everyone's kids. My wife and mum rescued me from further debate. Funny, now that I come to think of it, it was the same time I decided that the lady behind the counter that wouldn't sell me medicine for my 2 yr old (even though it had 2+ on the bottle) was being fuckin ridiculous. Much to my dads amusement I decided that the medicine was for my 6 yr old and was denied that too, much to my disappointment and grumblings. Come to think of it, that was the start of my change of mind... go figure.