FNG. Jockinese Jafa (Phil.T.Tipp)

[Phil.T.Tipp]

First post. Oooo I've come over all wobbly and excitable.

Hello all.

Back in the saddle after an enforced 18month lay-off by way of emigration coupled with extreme poverty. Now the boat's the right way up and there's more than just fluff lining me pockets I've only gone and got myself a StupidMotard. I love it. My daily commute has been transformed from an hour each way of steering-wheel-biting boredom, to a brisk and happy 15 min axe-murdering stampede of rape and pillage in the style of Genghis Khan on dual-purpose tyres. Marvellous. Reminds me of the giddy days in the 1980s where I somehow managed to survive years in a destructive co-dependent relationship with a couple of highly tuned Yamaha LCs.

Auckrand traffic is mind-bendingly awful. Britain's rush-hour road-rage maniacs pale into insig-fucking-nificance compared with the number of swivel-eyed loons who appear to be given gratis driving licenses here, distributed freely without recourse to training or testing it would seem. Still, it's a challenge.

I look forward to making your acquaintances dear fellow motorbicyclists.

Yours etc. etc.

Phil T Tipp

[Laava]

You sound like a loose unit!
Someone will be along soon to tut tut at your every word.

Oh, and welcome!

[Phil.T.Tipp]

Thankyou thankyou kind sir, I may be a loose unit, but I am I highly polished one.

Yours etc.

Phil T Tipp

[Maha]

Polishing your unit within the bounds of this forum is prohibited.

[Phil.T.Tipp]

Sir, being no stranger to controversy I must reveal that I'm polishing at this very minute.

Ooooo that's better.

Yours etc.

Phil T Tipp

[FJRider]

Loose units do have their uses ... if only for target practice

Welcome to the site ...

Your only mistake so far ... is residing in (or near) Jaffa city ...

[Phil.T.Tipp]

Indeed, the wide and dizzying array of international cuisine on offer notwithstanding - I am led to understand that AKL is in fact the armpit of the southern hemisphere.

Which would explain the smell.

Yours etc.

Phil T Tipp

[JafaSaffer]

Indeed, the wide and dizzying array of international cuisine on offer notwithstanding - I am led to understand that AKL is in fact the armpit of the southern hemisphere.

Which would explain the smell.

Yours etc.

Phil T Tipp

....you obviously have not been to Johannesburg yet....

[Coolz]

Welcome. Great signature line.

[Phil.T.Tipp]

Cheers gents.

JafaSaffer you're correct, S.A. has never had the pleasure of a visit by my good self so I can't speak for the foulness of Joburg...

In truth AKL isn't all that bad - I reckon most Kiwis haven't been to Glasgow.

Have a great Chrimbo all, keep it shiny side up.

Phil.T.Tipp

[george formby]

If you come across a decent tattie scone or butterie let me know. I've only got a tin of haggis in the cupboard for emergencies.

Ah, the Glasgow ring road... at rush hour, in the rain, after riding down from Lochinver. Such memories. Might have to crack the haggis..

[Phil.T.Tipp]

Hell's teeth! Tinned haggis, I never knew.

Maybe you should hang on to it until the 21st, when we all simultaneously explode, that way you won't have to rue the day you tasted it.

Nae butteries in sight, I think my old man has a recipe somewhere, Banff & Buchan's finest.

Cheerie noo

Phil.T.Tipp