10 reasons gay marriage will ruin society

[superman]

Courtesy of http://bligbi.com/2006/06/30/10-reas...-ruin-society/

1. Being gay is not natural. Real Americans ™ always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behaviour. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can’t marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn’t be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren’t full yet, and the world needs more children.
7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That’s why we have only one religion in America.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven’t adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

[bluninja]

I'll bite

Homosexuals unions are allowed in law, and obligations and protections are in place for relationships, but they want the the frocks and wedding ceremony.
No problem with this if marriage is then extended to ALL based on their desires for recognised lifelong relationships.

At present bigamy is illegal. You can have as many sexual partners on the go as you like and have children from multiple partners without committing an offence. However you can only marry one person, or off to jail with you cos society will collapse. So if you are going to move the goalposts about who can marry then why not go the whole hog and have polygamous marriages. Mistresses and "tennis coaches/personal trainers" would become a thing of the past Hey then you could marry straight and gay.

Imagine all the problems:

You have more than one mother in law
Your wife has a headache, but goes off to bed with her wife
You have an ensuite and a seperate bathroom, but they are always occupied for hours when you need a quick shower in the morning.
Your kids do nothing you tell them but love their other "parents" and hate you.
You get blamed for leaving the toilet seat up, and it's not you doing it.
Nobody wants to have late nights at the office in case it leads to marriage.
There are no perks to being a personal trianer any more.

Society will crumble..oh yes.