Men's rules

[Livvy]

It's true. They don't.

They're not mind-readers, you see, they don't think that someone else might have posted it up before.

All very good rules though and I follow most myself...

Kinda sad for a chick.

[Fatjim]

Rule #1

Men don't do relationships. Get a cat!

[MVnut]

................we have rules ?

[Livvy]

................we have rules ?

Yeah. Another rule is men don't tell each other anything.

[steveb64]

It's true. They don't.

They're not mind-readers, you see, they don't think that someone else might have posted it up before.

All very good rules though and I follow most myself...

Kinda sad for a chick.

Ahh, so young - but learning so fast...

[Livvy]

Ahh, so young - but learning so fast...

I try my very best.

[munterk6]

The Man Rules­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­
At last a bloke has taken the time to write this all down

Finally , the Blokes ' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear 'the rules'
From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.

Please note.. These are all numbered '1'
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
Or the changing of the tides.
Let it be..

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. 'Yes' and 'No' are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.

That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one .

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A colour.

Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' we will act like nothing's wrong
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,

Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere,

absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Footy (any code Or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can -
To give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can -

To give them a bigger laugh.








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[Mom]

Oh really, have a listen to this and have a think....

[munterk6]

Oh really, have a listen to this and have a think....

aaaaaaahhh Wot?

Hahahahahaha!!

[slofox]

Oh really, have a listen to this and have a think....

Hey dat's cool Mom.......

[007XX]

Oh really, have a listen to this and have a think....

Excellent!!

[Tink]

You may have already seen this but funny anyway!

The Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

Finally , the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear " the Rules "
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports, It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want..

Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes or No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
And if you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle..

1. If you ask a question that you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer that you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, hockey
or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes..

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

[Laxi]

lmfao! too true

[FJRider]

Apart from being posted before.. its still good.... you forgot to add the other rule.

Men are always right .... eventually

[Tink]

Sorry about that folks did not realise it had been posted before only got the email myself this morning....

I guess when one reaches a certain point in life... all the trivial shit flies out the window... and the facts walk in... I see it all as fact ... apart from

MEN are not always right... but they do have their moments in the sun...