Child support

**awa355** · 2nd March 2013, 00:57

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/crime/news...ectid=10868210

Anyone here affected by this? I have a mate who is on an average wage, whos looses a big chunk of that in compulsary child support. This while trying to build a new family life. He cannot see himself as ever being able to get ahead, at least untill his children have left school.

His ex has their two children, lives with her partner. They both are in fulltime work earning far more than Andrew could ever hope to. He accepts he has a responsibility to provide for his own children but gets a lot of shit from the ex to provide more and more of the basic things for the children that she and her partner can easily afford to do so. She manipulates his love for the kids a lot.

No easy answer either way.

**nzspokes** · 2nd March 2013, 05:19

Yup, sounds like me. I pay heaps a week and she gives me shit all the time wanting more.

**Maha** · 2nd March 2013, 06:32

My split years ago was amicable enough.. we decide to keep the authorities out of it and came to an agreed figure of which I would pay each week...it has been 13 years now and the agreement is still in place, for another 18 months, then my youngest will be 18.

**mashman** · 2nd March 2013, 07:30

My mum has worked for the CSA in the UK for longer than she cares to remember and yes people top themselves. Plenty have meltdowns and can't hold on to their jobs, plenty just can't afford to pay as they have to pay multiple rents and multiple utility bills etc... and at the end of it the kids still need to be looked after. A lot of relationships break down because of a lack of money in the household in the first place and it's adding insult to injury that the IRD keeps a book on them thar bad folk who are trying to make a living whilst also supporting their family(s). It's just another one of those wonderous things that money (aka the financial system) imposes on people's lives. It's disheartening to say the least and I feel for every honest fucker that's stuck fighting the system whilst trying to "get ahead".

Not sure if the same powers are granted here, but in the UK they can arrest wages from people's bank accounts... and not all of the money goes to the parents because there's the administration overhead to pay for too. It's FUBAR!

**Road kill** · 2nd March 2013, 08:07

So the basic idea is that once a woman remarries then the responsibility for her kids should pass on to the new man while daddy parties on.

Or for what ever reason,,,the father should not be held responsible for his own kids,,,because he's found a way to avoid them.

Somebody correct me here,,,,but is that attitude not the very reason these people are in this situation to begin with.

They simply run out on shit when the going gets hard,,,and their children are no different.

I know a number of people on both sides of this fence,,none of them are exactly living it up while the other pays.

I take it Mashman ect,there's some level you people don't belive a man should have to provide for his own children,,or if somehow the kids mother should remarry then the responsibility goes to the new man ?

Forget all the hippy shit about the evils of money.
This is about nothing more than basic responsibility for your own off spring.
People that don't like that simply shouldn't breed.
End of story.

Now wait for the fucking excuses,,,,not that we haven't heard it all before.

**Bikemad** · 2nd March 2013, 08:28

Originally Posted by Maha

My split years ago was amicable enough.. we decide to keep the authorities out of it and came to an agreed figure of which I would pay each week...it has been 13 years now and the agreement is still in place, for another 18 months, then my youngest will be 18.

heads up Maha............officially child support is expected till the childs 19th b/day

**mashman** · 2nd March 2013, 08:58

Originally Posted by Road kill

I take it Mashman ect,there's some level you people don't belive a man should have to provide for his own children,,or if somehow the kids mother should remarry then the responsibility goes to the new man ?

Forget all the hippy shit about the evils of money.
This is about nothing more than basic responsibility for your own off spring.
People that don't like that simply shouldn't breed.
End of story.

Now wait for the fucking excuses,,,,not that we haven't heard it all before.

bwaaaaaa ha ha ha ha haaaaaaa... Who are my people? What I believe a man should be responsible for is irrelevant to the situation. It's the money that's the problem. Tis what the whole article is about. Money money money money. If the money wasn't an issue, then it'd be an article about parenting, which it isn't. There are plenty of people who simply can't afford to provide for their kids following a split, short of living in a tent and eating once a week.

Now you can either get the fuck over it, move the fuck on, or deal with the real fuckin issue. Til then, suck it up fag, coz nuffin will change.

Til then, folk will breed and be able to afford kids and then they'll split up and not be able to afford those kids. End of the real world story.

**MSTRS:Me** · 2nd March 2013, 09:20

And for the record, the number of fathers who 'run out on their responsibilities' is not as many as you'd think compared to the number of fathers who are treated as a meal ticket.

**Flip** · 2nd March 2013, 18:50

Meal ticket, ha ha ha.

If that means feeding your children then I am all for it.

**Maha** · 2nd March 2013, 19:10

Originally Posted by Bikemad

heads up Maha............officially child support is expected till the childs 19th b/day

Oh?....damn

**blackdog** · 2nd March 2013, 20:02

Originally Posted by Road kill

So the basic idea is that once a woman remarries then the responsibility for her kids should pass on to the new man while daddy parties on.

Or for what ever reason,,,the father should not be held responsible for his own kids,,,because he's found a way to avoid them.

Somebody correct me here,,,,but is that attitude not the very reason these people are in this situation to begin with.

They simply run out on shit when the going gets hard,,,and their children are no different.

I know a number of people on both sides of this fence,,none of them are exactly living it up while the other pays.

I take it Mashman ect,there's some level you people don't belive a man should have to provide for his own children,,or if somehow the kids mother should remarry then the responsibility goes to the new man ?

Forget all the hippy shit about the evils of money.
This is about nothing more than basic responsibility for your own off spring.
People that don't like that simply shouldn't breed.
End of story.

Now wait for the fucking excuses,,,,not that we haven't heard it all before.

Please remove the fucking comma button from your keyboard.

**gunnyrob** · 3rd March 2013, 08:26

Once you're paying child support, you're basically fucked unless you can get custody of the kids, the kids turn 19, or your ex-wife of 10 years has "an accident". My son now lives with me and I can now afford to pay a mortgage.

Only sure fire way of avoiding child support is to "cover guns" when indulging in horizontal folk dancing and not have kids in the first place.