Busting myths

**Edbear** · 13th March 2013, 10:48

Originally Posted by Banditbandit

Naa .. it's messier than that Ed .. this study says cohabitating couples are happier than married couples - but is silent on the sexual orientation of the couples ...

http://cornellsun.com/node/49440

But Ed is probably right - I followed the path to the full Yap article - the research was done in Britain ... and the discussion clearly implies that "marriage" is a heterosexual relationship ... and married people are happier than non-married people ...

The articles on gay marriage suggesting that married gay people will be happier than non-married gay people are based on the research that heterosexual people are happier married - the extrapolation is that gay people will be happier married because heterosexual people are AND because it legalises the relationship ... these are discursive articles argueing for Gay marriage - not research articles ..

So Ed is basically right if a little simplistic - and the research is that heterosexual people are happer when married ... and there is a strong implication that homosexual people will also be happier when they are married than non-married gay people ..

The study also doesn't address the fact that the break up rate for cohabiting couples is many times higher than for married couples and six years is really not long enough. The longer one remains married the more likely one will continue to remain married. After 35 years, we have no arguments between us, no major issues to deal with, we have everything we need and a lot we don't, we are settled and secure with ourselves as to who we are, our emotions are far better controlled and the list goes on. Stress levels are minimal for all manner of reasons due to longevity.

Here's an interesting article on Homosexuality in relationships.
http://ije.oxfordjournals.org/content/26/3/657

**bogan** · 13th March 2013, 10:50

Originally Posted by Edbear

Stress levels are minimal for all manner of reasons due to longevity.

Yeh, I don't think I'll give a fuck when I'm as old as treebeard either.

Bet that dude got his end away in many an Entmoot when he was a you fulla though... and happily cohabitates in the forest with much polygamy I'm sure.

**Edbear** · 13th March 2013, 10:52

Originally Posted by bogan

Yeh, I don't think I'll give a fuck when I'm as old as treebeard either.

Let's just say you don't sweat the small stuff anymore and one's priorities are such that you appreciate the simple things in life.

.

**Swoop** · 13th March 2013, 11:35

It should be interesting finding out the reasons behind the happiness ("wife's gone away for a month", "hubby's away fishing with mates", etc, etc).

Sent from the trash compactor of the Death Stars' recycling centre.

**Virago** · 13th March 2013, 11:37

Originally Posted by Edbear

Since the mesia focus on homosexual couples have only been a relatively recent phenomonen, and yes I know Homosexuality has been around for thousands of years, the studies previously have focussed on heterosexual marriages.

Latest studies are including homosexual couples but world-wide, they are still outside the "marriage" scene and while they may be together, only in the last fwer months have the Governments been willing to consider marrying homosexual couples. Hence the studies on marriage remain those of heterosexual married couples.

Originally Posted by Banditbandit

Naa .. it's messier than that Ed .. this study says cohabitating couples are happier than married couples - but is silent on the sexual orientation of the couples ...

http://cornellsun.com/node/49440

But Ed is probably right - I followed the path to the full Yap article - the research was done in Britain ... and the discussion clearly implies that "marriage" is a heterosexual relationship ... and married people are happier than non-married people ...

The articles on gay marriage suggesting that married gay people will be happier than non-married gay people are based on the research that heterosexual people are happier married - the extrapolation is that gay people will be happier married because heterosexual people are AND because it legalises the relationship ... these are discursive articles argueing for Gay marriage - not research articles ..

So Ed is basically right if a little simplistic - and the research is that heterosexual people are happer when married ... and there is a strong implication that homosexual people will also be happier when they are married than non-married gay people ..

Bingo - now we're getting somewhere - thank you gentlemen.

It's the old "World Series" argument - an American sports team will always win the World Series, because only American teams are invited. Elimination by exclusion.

Married heterosexuals are happier - but only because homosexuals are excluded from the process. Elimination by exclusion.

Originally Posted by Edbear

...Here's an interesting article on Homosexuality in relationships.
http://ije.oxfordjournals.org/content/26/3/657

I must be young and stupid again. That article looks at the HIV related mortality rates in gay and bisexual men, and has no reference to relationships whatsoever. Can you please explain what the article has to do with marriage or relationships?

**Edbear** · 13th March 2013, 11:46

Originally Posted by Virago

Bingo - now we're getting somewhere - thank you gentlemen.

It's the old "World Series" argument - an American sports team will always win the World Series, because only American teams are invited. Elimination by exclusion.

Married heterosexuals are happier - but only because homosexuals are excluded from the process. Elimination by exclusion.

I must be young and stupid again. That article looks at the mortality rates in gay and bisexual men, and has no reference to relationships whatsoever. Can you please explain what the article has to do with marriage or relationships?

The original article was about the difference between married and unmarried - nothing to do with homosexual's at all.

Granted the link doesn't discuss relationahips, my bad. I'm trying to do several things at once. I will find another article.

**Katman** · 13th March 2013, 11:57

Originally Posted by Edbear

I'm trying to do several things at once.

And I imagine you're doing them all just as badly.

**wysper** · 13th March 2013, 11:59

Originally Posted by Virago

It's the old "World Series" argument - an American sports team will always win the World Series, because only American teams are invited. Elimination by exclusion.

Just to be a pedantic pain in the arse, I believe it is called the world series because it was originally sponsored but the World News or something like that, never had anything to do with the geographic catchment of the tournament.

But back on subject(ish), I don't think it is the situation as much as the person.

For instance, I was happy when I was single, I was happy when I left school, I was happy when I was there, I was happy (and am happily) married. I was happy when we didn't have kids but now we have kids I am happy to have them and wouldn't want them out of my life.

So maybe it is the person finds happiness in the situation they are in rather then just the situation making them happy.

Actually - reading back, that really isn't on topic at all. Kind of more on a bit of a tangent, but vaguely related.

Anyway, as you were.

Sent from work while I should have been working not posting on a forum

**Edbear** · 13th March 2013, 12:05

Originally Posted by Swoop

It should be interesting finding out the reasons behind the happiness ("wife's gone away for a month", "hubby's away fishing with mates", etc, etc).

Sent from the trash compactor of the Death Stars' recycling centre.

LOL!! Some alone time is essential in any relationship and we remain individuals with different interests. It is part of a happy marriage that each allows the other to have their own interests and not try to be too controlling.

Originally Posted by wysper

Just to be a pedantic pain in the arse, I believe it is called the world series because it was originally sponsored but the World News or something like that, never had anything to do with the geographic catchment of the tournament.

But back on subject(ish), I don't think it is the situation as much as the person.

For instance, I was happy when I was single, I was happy when I left school, I was happy when I was there, I was happy (and am happily) married. I was happy when we didn't have kids but now we have kids I am happy to have them and wouldn't want them out of my life.

So maybe it is the person finds happiness in the situation they are in rather then just the situation making them happy.

Actually - reading back, that really isn't on topic at all. Kind of more on a bit of a tangent, but vaguely related.

Anyway, as you were.

Sent from work while I should have been working not posting on a forum

Oh, I think it is very on-topic! Good on yer!

**Edbear** · 13th March 2013, 12:08

A link on relationships. Interesting that she thinks allowing gay couples to marry will improve it, I personally doubt it as there are other factors involved.

http://msutoday.msu.edu/news/2013/st...e-sex-couples/

**Banditbandit** · 13th March 2013, 12:09

Originally Posted by Virago

Married heterosexuals are happier - but only because homosexuals are excluded from the process. Elimination by exclusion.

No. sorry, you can't draw that inference .. the reseach says that Married couples are generally happier than Single people ... it is silent on sexual orientation ...

It does not say that married heterosexual couples are happier than homosexual couples ... which is why the advocates of homosexual marriages can use this research to argue that married homosexual couples will be happier than non-married homosexuals ... and therefore allowing homosexuals to marry will make the world a happier place ...

**MSTRS:Me** · 13th March 2013, 12:11

Originally Posted by wysper

Just to be a pedantic pain in the arse, I believe it is called the world series because it was originally sponsored but the World News or something like that, never had anything to do with the geographic catchment of the tournament.

You sure it's not because the world begins and ends at the edge/s of the states? Hawaii and Alaska don't REALLY count in this instance...

**Banditbandit** · 13th March 2013, 12:15

Originally Posted by wysper

Just to be a pedantic pain in the arse, I believe it is called the world series because it was originally sponsored but the World News or something like that, never had anything to do with the geographic catchment of the tournament.

But back on subject(ish), I don't think it is the situation as much as the person.

For instance, I was happy when I was single, I was happy when I left school, I was happy when I was there, I was happy (and am happily) married. I was happy when we didn't have kids but now we have kids I am happy to have them and wouldn't want them out of my life.

So maybe it is the person finds happiness in the situation they are in rather then just the situation making them happy.

Actually - reading back, that really isn't on topic at all. Kind of more on a bit of a tangent, but vaguely related.

Anyway, as you were.

Sent from work while I should have been working not posting on a forum

Not true - that's an urban legend .. go here .. http://roadsidephotos.sabr.org/baseball/name.htm

**Virago** · 13th March 2013, 12:18

Originally Posted by Banditbandit

No. sorry, you can't draw that inference .. the reseach says that Married couples are generally happier than Single people ... it is silent on sexual orientation ...

Bingo. Thank you.