What's the most enraging thing a computer illiterate person has said to you?

[avgas]

At work we have a very important application that runs on a remote PC, and to keep track that all is OK we have a slave display in the control room. One night we lost contact with the remote PC. I was unable to ping it, and data stopped being received. I logged an urgent help desk request describing the PC, its location, the nature of the problem and the consequences if the required data couldn't be received, and saying that I was unable to connect to it.

I received an email from the IT person looking into the issue asking me to get some information from the computer that I couldn't connect to or even ping. The instructions to get this information started with ' On the affected PC click start, the open a command window...'

GE? Wonderware? or Schneider/Citect?
I once had an interesting discussion with a "control engineer who had 30 years experience" about how telemetry is different from control (I used to do both). He was telling me that they were exactly the same and that I was "over-engineering" my design.
Politely explained to him that I would record that down, and when a REMOTE telemetry site went down and lost control - they could call him to drive the 40km journey to see what was wrong.
While I can't say much for most graduates......it scares me what comes out of ECNZ's finest every now and then. Turns out whatever generation I deal with - there are people whom understand stuff, and morons.
Usually the latter stop learning when they get "qualified".

[avgas]

I wonder if that kind of thing might affect "Metro". The Windows RT tablets only do "modern U.I." (it's so locked down I personally hate the heck out of it). But a "full" Windows 8 machine will run "normal" desktop software. And manufacturers seem to be making more cheapish Win 8 tablets by using Atom processors, rather than by using Windows RT. So will Metro ever really take off? (Other than by MS forcing it on us, like how even the server installs use a metro style interface.)
)

Development for metro is about 10 times that for 8-desktop. Purely because if you develop something for metro not only will it work on RT - can be ported easily to win8 mobile.
It's also setup perfectly for .net so all the .net devs can develop for metro with very little learning.
The other side of this is that there a market for metro apps......but not for desktop apps.

So it's likely to take hold whether we like it or not.
It's Microsofts strike back at Apple/Google and it seems to be working (slowly).

The other side to this which I am unsure about is Ubuntu.........being the same on phone, pc and server

[Smifffy]

I was working with a guy who was complaining about his laptop crapping out all the time. He needed his laptop for our project, so I offered to take a look. Turns out he had at least 3 viruses in there, none of which were particularly nasty, just bothersome. Some googling showed that they were relatively easy to remove, and so I removed them for him.

I got that call six months later at dinner time, long after the project was completed and we had gone our separate ways. "What did you do to my computer? I can't geet my emails."

Me:"Are you telling me that you've gone for the last 6 months without getting any emails?"

Him:"No, it worked really well after you fixed it, and it lasted until yesterday, and now I can't get the internet or my email"

[Mental Trousers]

Because that would have been a big mistake. One of the reasons I don't like fixing/upgrading other peoples computers is because in 6 months from now when they've managed to get it infested with malware they ring me up and say "That thingy you did 6 months ago has now broken my computer, I want it fixed". She's the kind of person who would expect me to be her 24/7 tech support guy asking how to send an email or how to copy and paste every time she has a problem.

It's not much different from taking your car to a mechanic to get a gearbox service, and then complaining to the mechanic next time the vehicle fails a WOF for leaky shocks and chassis rust and expecting them to fix it for free.

Get some business cards printed with the wrong phone number on them. People you don't want to see again you tell them your contact details have changed and here's the new details.

[Mom]

My name is Mom and I am computer illiterate...

I have 3 screens on my desktop, I need them. For some reason one of them drops off from time to time. I arrive at work and only 2 have a display. I send a Skype to the IT guy and he comes and fixes it for me. Last time it happened, he suggested I crawl (literally crawl between my desk and the wall, then contort myself so I can see behind my desk mind) around the back of my desk and fiddle with some of the connections before I contact him. That enraged me! I am a woman of a certain age, that wears really nice clothes to work. I will not crawl anywhere at work thank you. How about he simply tightens the connections on the plugs so they don't fall out

[Drew]

I am a complete retard when it comes to computers.

I once spent half an hour on the phone with a guy who is proper in the know, to discover why I had no internet. I had the router unplugged from the phone line somehow.

[Akzle]

I am a complete retard when it comes to computers.

I once spent half an hour on the phone with a guy who is proper in the know, to discover why I had no internet. I had the router unplugged from the phone line somehow.

huh. 'is your shit plugged in?' is normally question number 1...
Followed by 'reset it'
if its more fucked than that, then you done bad.

[Smifffy]

Just to prove that karma is a bitch, I did it to my own self today lol.

Wireless mouse working fine one minute then totally locked up the next. A bit of fiddling, a bit of try another mouse. No way could it be flat batteries - those bitches are fairly new lithiums at $11 the pair, cos I was sick of always having the batteries run out. A bit more internet surfing for troubleshooting tips. Hmmm M$ wireless mice of this model have given plenty of ppl trouble in the past. Hunt through boxes for old mice, can't get them to go either - gah curses.

Try new batteries anyway. Whaddayaknow? Works like a charm.....

[Gremlin]

I am a complete retard when it comes to computers.

I once spent half an hour on the phone with a guy who is proper in the know, to discover why I had no internet. I had the router unplugged from the phone line somehow.

Been guilty of that before. You spend a few days eyeball deep in complex issues, then get a client who sounds like he knows what he's doing, and something isn't working. You dig around, try to get remote access, not working... hold on, can you access ANYTHING?

Your computer isn't plugged into the network, check your network cables

[imac]

My name is Mom and I am computer illiterate...

I have 3 screens on my desktop, I need them. For some reason one of them drops off from time to time. I arrive at work and only 2 have a display. I send a Skype to the IT guy and he comes and fixes it for me. Last time it happened, he suggested I crawl (literally crawl between my desk and the wall, then contort myself so I can see behind my desk mind) around the back of my desk and fiddle with some of the connections before I contact him. That enraged me! I am a woman of a certain age, that wears really nice clothes to work. I will not crawl anywhere at work thank you. How about he simply tightens the connections on the plugs so they don't fall out

Yeah um... as whipper snapper PFY I asked a caller to crawl under her desk to check something. It took a while and I heard a lot of grunting and sighing. When I asked if everything was okay she told me she was 7 months pregnant!

[oneofsix]

My name is Mom and I am computer illiterate...

I have 3 screens on my desktop, I need them. For some reason one of them drops off from time to time. I arrive at work and only 2 have a display. I send a Skype to the IT guy and he comes and fixes it for me. Last time it happened, he suggested I crawl (literally crawl between my desk and the wall, then contort myself so I can see behind my desk mind) around the back of my desk and fiddle with some of the connections before I contact him. That enraged me! I am a woman of a certain age, that wears really nice clothes to work. I will not crawl anywhere at work thank you. How about he simply tightens the connections on the plugs so they don't fall out

FFS Mom you never tighten those connections, someday you might want to remove the plugs (say for a hardware upgrade).

I usually give the screws a turn or two, so they stay in place but are still easy to remove. Its beastly when some prick has done the screws up really tight and you need a screw driver to get them undone, do they think they are bolting up the axle bolt or tightening the head?

[Mom]

Yeah um... as whipper snapper PFY I asked a caller to crawl under her desk to check something. It took a while and I heard a lot of grunting and sighing. When I asked if everything was okay she told me she was 7 months pregnant!

FFS Mom you never tighten those connections, someday you might want to remove the plugs (say for a hardware upgrade).

I usually give the screws a turn or two, so they stay in place but are still easy to remove. Its beastly when some prick has done the screws up really tight and you need a screw driver to get them undone, do they think they are bolting up the axle bolt or tightening the head?

I probably should have said I have once, crawled, bent, reached, exposed my underwear as I bent, crawled etc.

I fuxed the screens They did not stay fuxed. I wont do it again. Even half a turn MUST keep the fuckers there, Shirley?

[Gremlin]

Even half a turn MUST keep the fuckers there, Shirley?

Actually no. I give em a good screw to the end (but not as tight as can be). With the plug still loose it can come part way off the contacts, and especially for DVI, that little bit of looseness in the plug can be enough to create issues.

[Brian d marge]

Linux FTW!!!!!

hahahaa I was just going to type
windoze 6,7,8,9 10 ,,,,,,,,,,

Stephen

[GDOBSSOR]

psssssssht.
there's no school in the south island.

y'know... windows sucks so much ass, you could probably have recovered them.
1) the undelete
2) a low level read/write to restore the file headers. (linux. f the f-ing win)

Like the time I meant to delete two computer programmes I didn't need anymore, and ended up deleting everything on the computer EXCEPT those two programmes... Dad's friend used undelete to restore most stuff.