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Thread: Stella Awards

  1. #1
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    Stella Awards

    Stella Awards

    It's time once again to consider the candidates for the annual Stella Awards. The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonalds. That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in the United States.

    The following are this year's candidates:

    1. Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a nightclub in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

    2. Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next-door neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

    3. A 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hub caps.

    4. A. Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 a! after she slipped on a soft drink spill and broke her coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

    5. Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He couldn't reenter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of $500,000.

    6. A jury of her peers awarded Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, $780,000 after breaking her ankle by tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving little toddler was Ms. Robertson's son.

    7. This year's favorite could easily be Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On his first trip home, having driven onto the freeway, he set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the drivers seat to go into the back and make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the R.V. left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him in the owner's manual that he couldn't actually do this. The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new motor home. The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit, just in case there were any other complete morons buying their recreation vehicles.
    Only a man who knows what it is like to be defeated can reach down to the bottom of his soul and come up with the extra ounce of power it takes to win when the match is even.
    Muhammad Ali

  2. #2
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    seen this previously ----- still gives me mega-angst though ..
    ... ...

    Grass wedges its way between the closest blocks of marble and it brings them down. This power of feeble life which can creep in anywhere is greater than that of the mighty behind their cannons....... - Honore de Balzac

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    Only in America folks!

  4. #4
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    After reading that I wonder why no ones sued themselves. Guess it's only a matter of time.................or perhaps no ones thought of it.


    Skyryder
    Free Scott Watson.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mstriumph
    seen this previously ----- still gives me mega-angst though ..
    Yeah, me too.
    Marty

    Ever notice that anyone slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dafe
    Only in America folks!
    If only. It seems like everyone is out to make a buck. No such thing as an accident anymore! Someone must be to blame, even if it is an accident, it seems. Oz is getting very much the same. Lawyers must love it.
    Marty

    Ever notice that anyone slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?

  7. #7
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    Its sick people like this piss me off so bad, when we were at the ambassador on friday night some punk stole my mates jacket off his scooter, assholes if you ask me. The world has too many takers not enough givers.
    Only a man who knows what it is like to be defeated can reach down to the bottom of his soul and come up with the extra ounce of power it takes to win when the match is even.
    Muhammad Ali

  8. #8
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    I posted this exact post about 7 months ago
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sniper
    I posted this exact post about 7 months ago
    Thought it sounded familiar.
    Marty

    Ever notice that anyone slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by zadok
    If only. It seems like everyone is out to make a buck. No such thing as an accident anymore! Someone must be to blame, even if it is an accident, it seems. Oz is getting very much the same. Lawyers must love it.
    OZ Hmmmmm,
    A guy over there resently got a $70,000 pay out for crashing a mates bike and hurting himself while he was drunk.Seems it was his mates fault for leting him ride the bike drunk in the first place.
    I could think of a few natural justice type responces for that wally.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jackrat
    OZ Hmmmmm,
    A guy over there resently got a $70,000 pay out for crashing a mates bike and hurting himself while he was drunk.Seems it was his mates fault for leting him ride the bike drunk in the first place.
    I could think of a few natural justice type responces for that wally.
    I could tell you what I would do if my mate bloody tried to sue me!
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

  12. #12
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    Wheres my bloody gun? I think the gene pool needs a good filtering
    "Not one day that we are here on this earth has been promised to us, so make the most of every day as if it was your last, and every breath ,as if it were the same"

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Storm
    Wheres my bloody gun? I think the gene pool needs a good filtering
    I know what you mean. Its sad that we can't shoot people sometimes
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

  14. #14
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    http://www.snopes.com/legal/lawsuits.asp

    That particular list is fake.

    The Stella's are however real, and plenty of equally absured lawsuits are genuine.
    .

  15. #15
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    number 7 hands down. have heard this before, but it just gets funnier every time
    There is no dark side of the moon, really, as a matter of fact. Its all dark...

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