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Thread: Barry Sheene festival, Drew and Alan F1 sidecar

  1. #1
    Join Date
    5th April 2004 - 20:04
    Exxon Valdez

    Barry Sheene festival, Drew and Alan F1 sidecar

    Seems like a long time ago that we got up there, so forgive me if some of the details are out of sequence.

    I was in Perth for work leading up to the event, so Alan showed just what a legend he is and did all of the prep himself and enlisted the help of general GC Luke to get the chair in the dungeon. There was a bit needed doing to the chair, since we'd been spending all our spare time playing on the scramblers instead of working on the chair. But he got it done and did a great job of it.

    I left Perth at midnight local time, Wednesday night. Arriving back in Wellington around 4pm Thursday LT. Got back on a plane for Aukland at 6ish, and got in around half nine. To sum up, I WAS COMPLETELY FUCKED.


    Arriving at the track at about seven and Dave has set up in a not bad spot, and invited us to pit beside him. Sweet! The weather was shithouse first thing, so after we got the pit set up we weren't actually in that much of a hurry to get out on track, we know where the track goes after all, and practicing sliding off onto the grass is like masturbating with a cheese grater. Slightly amusing, but mostly painful. Once the sun came out we suited up and headed out for a play.

    This is the first time we have had the fairing fitted since the massive crash at last year's Barry Sheene, and we had mounted it differently since all the mounts were fucked in the crash. Alas, it was a bit less rigid than before. So once the chair got up to speed and the wind got up under it/all around it, the thing would wobble and shake a bit. That equaled some serious bloody instability under hard braking, along with the fairing dragging along the track when the front compressed. We figured the dragging would sort itself out in good time since track surfaces tend to be quite abrasive. We had bigger fish to fry.

    With the chair now running at full power (oh sweet merciful baby Jesus is that an impressive amount of power too!), the monster ZX12 managed to blow the possibly compromised (what with the chair having flipped violently a couple times last year) muffler apart. So we pulled off the track early to suss out why it sounded funny.

    "Hmmm, that's well fucked".

    "Yip, we're gonna need to get 'inventive' (read 'rough as guts') to assemble that to a usable state".

    Enter another all round GC Bret, who informs us he'll bring one of his spares from home in the morning.

    We bodgy the Two Brothers can back together so we can get in another session, and head back out to do some laps.

    The instability is still there but it feels manageable to a degree, and besides, we were doing some fucken cool looking sick skids into turns 2 and 4.

    We complete the session and get down to the serious task of sinking a couple Heineken. I stayed at a mates place in Papakura for the weekend, so I buggered off back there and was asleep by 6pm and dead to the world. Content in the knowledge that our chair is super friggin quick, and my lack of talent and it's handling quirks are nothing to worry about.


    As I arrive, The farm boys are manning the gate. I'm told I received quite the character assassination the night before, for having fucked off and not stuck around to party. Small price to pay for 12 hours sleep, so suck my salty nuts!

    Bret drops off the muffler he had lying around, that he spent an hour or two altering so it would fit the outfit. Bearded men really are the best! So we fit that bad boy and it sounds mean!

    We are programmed for a qualifying session and two races today, and we're feeling ready for it.

    Qualifying was uneventful, but the instability under brakes is starting to wear me down. The faster we go the worse it gets, and it's presenting as a very limiting factor. We managed 7th out of 18 I think, but we need to get some actual racing in to get an actual idea of how bad it is slowing us down.

    Race 1. How much? LOTS AND FUCKEN LOTS! We narrowly stay ahead of the farm boys on their 600, and watch the Aussie teams on their F2 outfits fuck off into the sunset.

    "Right, lets just arsehole the fairing and run it like we did last year. We know it is stable and predictable like that". I say.

    "Top plan, where's my angle grinder to get rid of that front mount"? Asks Al.

    Race 2. "WHOOPS"!!!!

    We hadn't ridden a right hand track with the bike running right and no fairing. "How much can it effect things" you might ask? Without the ten+ kilos hanging out over the front, our sidecar will literally just pick the front wheel up off the deck and turn left...REAL FAST. So we spent the race watching Corey and Tim (the farm boys) gap it away from us, and doing everything I could to hold off the onslaught from Warwick on one chair, and Goober on another. Luckily at the final turn on the last lap, Goober fucks it right up and seems to go for a look at the outside white line to see if it's different to the inside one that's visible when you're on the racing line. That held Wazza up and we managed to keep the nose ahead in a drag race to the finish line. Did I mention that our chair is a formidable beast to try and outrun in a straight line? Warwick will attest if you need confirmation.

    "Jesus bro, we need to sort this out".

    "Yeah, but we just cut the mounts for the body work off. And we need to add some to get it hunky dory".

    I went for a wander and asked if Bret could bring his welder along in the morning for us, and Sidecarbob pipes up that there happens to be one in Gordies truck right there. "FUCKEN SWEET". So I flogged that and went to make some mounts. "Tickety boo, lets see if this Heineken tastes as good as last nights batch"!


    Race 3. Due to a DNF in yesterday's final race by the fairly tolerable Australian named 'Dags' who had gearbox issues, we were still gridded up in 7th spot. The grid is based on the previous races results at this event, which is really motivating to go well every time. Al and I are pretty bloody determined to give this a good nudge. We get a blinder of a launch and sail past all but the top four, with Pete the Pirate holding the inside line into turn one. We tag onto him as best we can and I give no thought to anything that might be happening behind us.

    He's still in sight as lap two starts, and he makes a right old hash of turn one. We make some ground and it's obvious he hasn't settled into a grove. We continued to catch up as he had a really ugly lap all the way to the line. He gets his shit in one sock for lap three though, and I'm not keen to push any harder for the time being even though our chair is feeling better than it ever has. We run a fairly lonely 3rd and 4th lap, to finish 5th. First short chair by a long shot, and some respectable long outfits trailing a bit to boot!

    Leading up to race five, Al and I have a plan. There's not the slightest chance in the world that the Pirate can keep up with us off the line, so we're gonna dispatch the surly bastard and rob him of the inside line through turn one. Hehehe, good plan.

    Worked a bloody treat too. There was nothing he could do, and we even had enough of a jump that I had to back off a bit because there was no where to go with Arron/Tracy, Adam/Stu, and Barry/Robby going into turn one three wide. I follow them through 1, and have to back out of it again into turn two. "What the bloody hell are we doing running up with these guys". I ask myself.

    They all settle down a bit and pull a gap down to turn four. I brake for it and the Pirate shows the nose on the inside. "You're gonna work for this spot old boy". So I live out wide for the turn knowing I'm in the pound seat for turn five, and we have a wee drag race toward it.

    Bastard later tells me he was gonna have room to come across our nose through the turn, but that isn't what I thought he was thinking so as he gains on us on the outside I let off the brakes a bit to get ahead. I get back on the picks to turn in, aaaaaaaannnnnnnndddddddd it pitches the chair wheel skyward in a hell of a hurry. As the new fairing mount is down low, it seems to have dug in a bit and tried to swing us right. Down comes the chair wheel as fast as it went up. The corner still goes left though, and I've got the Pirate/Darren blocking any escape route. So we have another stab at it. Nope! Up the chair goes again, and since this has all happened in about a second, we finally find the point at which Alan 'spider monkey' Denovan can no longer hang on. He hangs on for a bit and gets dragged down the track on his head, but has to let go and do a cool wee dance to avoid getting dotted by any one of the 11 or 12 sidecars hurtling toward him.

    I will admit to being more than just a little bewildered as to where to go, and luckily gather my wits before I coast straight off the outside of the track. The farm boys are prolly quite glad of that, and narrowly avoid me to continue round the bend and off to do some racing.

    I pull up over the gravel trap, and Al comes running over to meet me. Bit of a cuddle and make sure he's all good, and we make ourselves comfy and watch everyone else having fun.

    Having not finished the final points race, meant we had to start from dead last in the feature race. Bloody good job there's no one else out there that can leave the line like we can!

    We grid up at the back, and I get out my binoculars so I can see the start lights. They go out and we set about getting some redemption. We blitz a few bikes to turn one, but there's much work still to do. Into turn 2 we make another couple spots, but there's no way through at turn 4. We get a good drive up the short straight to turn 5, but without planning it we are on the dreaded inside line and going in reeeeeaaaaal deep. Al later confesses to thoughts along the lines of. "Fuck you're a retard Drew. We just tried this in the last race and look what bloody happened"! But we make it round, and find ourselves somewhere up around position 8 or 9. We dispatch the farm boys and a couple other teams with sheer grunt towards the final turn, and find ourselves a shit ton further up the grid after one lap than we could have dared dream.

    This puts us on the back of a very capable 'Dags' riding a very bloody fast F2 chair belonging to Mick. We're quicker in lap time due to speed, but where he is fast by comparison makes him very hard to pass. We are behind him for about a lap but I muscle through on the start line of lap four and hang him out to dry at turn one.

    That leaves us with a couple poofs on a pink F2 to chase down. Scrivy and Steve have had a couple races before I'm told, so it's not gonna be easy to get them even with twice the engine capacity. Through lap four with the strength of our motor, it's not that hard to catch them. But although I can snake them on the straights, we just don't have handling to stay in front come time to go round a corner or turn one. We're behind them starting the final lap, and that Steve fucker is giving us the cheeky finger. Head down we go hard and try to pace them, I get by them into the final turn but we're waaaaaaaay too hot and I have to let the chair drift out into no mans land while we scrub off a bit of speed and gather it up. They shoot through the inside and Steve flips me the bird again thinking that they've got us. "Oh yeah, might wanna lay off the pies and your lovely wife's fantastic cooking, should you want to make that mistake bro".

    We've managed to get good drive onto the straight thanks to the spastic line we took, and with a flick of the wrist we power right on by the girls bike to snatch 5th place. Disappointingly close to the back of Warwick and co.

    That concludes the racing for the weekend, and we were both grinning like a pair of demented clowns for quite some time afterward.

    Special thanks to a lot of people. Alan of course, best swinger on the track! My lovely wife Jody, Brett the GC for his help with the pipe and making sure we had what we needed to get shit going, Dave and Maria for letting us pit with them and much help keeping us organised, Stevie for...well...being a dick and thoroughly entertaining (as well as making us proud by winning 'the Croz' trophy in the feature event), Gordie for his welder, and too many other people to name for encouragement and assistance.

    T'was a sensational weekend, and we're quite chuffed with ourselves.

    Drew, out!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    15th August 2009 - 16:48
    Yamaha SRX400
    Entertaining report, thanks.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    31st March 2005 - 02:18
    CB919, Tuono, R1200GSA
    East Aucks
    Blog Entries
    Twas a good read
    Quote Originally Posted by Jane Omorogbe from UK MSN on the KTM990SM
    It's barking mad and if it doesn't turn you into a complete loon within half an hour of cocking a leg over the lofty 875mm seat height, I'll eat my Arai.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    27th February 2005 - 08:47
    a red heap
    towel wronger
    thanks for your contribution

  5. #5
    Join Date
    13th March 2003 - 11:47
    1994 VFR750F, 2004 WR250F, 2006 XR250L
    Drew mate that is a great story, you and Alan (Weaver) can be proud of what you've done and as you said you are chuffed. When are the poofs on the pink chair going to get a real chair going again anyway?


  6. #6
    Join Date
    5th April 2004 - 20:04
    Exxon Valdez
    Quote Originally Posted by merv View Post
    Drew mate that is a great story, you and Alan (Weaver) can be proud of what you've done and as you said you are chuffed. When are the poofs on the pink chair going to get a real chair going again anyway?
    Should said poofs get the ergonomics right, and the brakes how Scrivy likes, I think things might be suitably difficult for us already. Let alone should they match us in horse power!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    6th January 2007 - 16:52
    Other peoples weapons....
    Quote Originally Posted by Drew View Post
    Should said poofs get the ergonomics right, and the brakes how Scrivy likes, I think things might be suitably difficult for us already. Let alone should they match us in horse power!
    Actually, im getting the hang of this sitting to pee stuff.....
    Although, double the Hp would be nice too.......
    Is it still beastiality if ya fuck a frozen chicken??

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