Morning Folks.
It's another lovely day down in the Capital (again). Don't believe me - Look, I've had breakfast
in the sun, I've done the dishes and have just finished doing the washing and hung it out, and
it's only 9:15am. Oh, and I even remembered to take my meds. So life's a veritable box of fluffies.
I'm sorry that yesterday's class was so short. It wasn't only that suggestion about launching
yourself off cliffs (post #332). As shocking as that was.
No, I had to go to church in the morning, and we went out in the afternoon as well, so I was
a little pressed for time. Yes, I had a lovely day out (thanks for asking).
And CasperNZ, I see you did as well. Post #389. Good to hear.
I mean:
- No ABS actuations
- Avoided the odd cow on the road
- Managed to stay upright in the brief shower that you encountered
- Avoided the tar bleed
- Avoided the dogs (well, it might just have been the time of day you were riding - they were
possibly having a little siesta in the afternoon sun - plus they were probably not out to get you !)
- Avoided the horse and rider, and got a cheery wave back
- Waved the faster riders past, and didn't feel the need to "up-the-pace" and try and catch them
after they had overtaken you and disappeared off into the distance.
Sounds like an absolutely idyllic afternoon out riding.
Actually, a little BlackBird informed me that you are actually quite a decent chap. He also told me
that you ride a yellow Hayabusa, and can hussle that machine around all those tight Coromandel
corners.
It's probably due to all those riding courses, and that IAM business that you do .... oh, and all
those YouTube clips. It's not that you're a lucky b@#$%&* at all ?
But just one little question, though. About the Hayabusa. Yellow ? Chicken Yellow ? Really ?
No, don't go and deny it. BlogSpot doesn't lie. It's up there for everyone to see.
Did you think one of those yellow Hi-Viz vests was not enough ? Oh well, each to their own.
No accounting for taste, I suppose. The world would be a dull place if we were all the same.
Well, I suppose at least they will see you coming..... 8-) That is, provided you keep to the
speed limit, and don't do any of that 'looming' business that IAM is always on about.
Sorry. Anyway, back to the main point of today's class.
Well, actually, if you don't mind, I'll make just one more little detour at this point. And then,
I promise, we'll get back on track.
It was while we were at church. Yes, I said a few prayers for you all while I was down on bended
knees. Yes, and even one for you-know-who.
Well, after the service had finished and we were standing around having a cup of tea and chatting
(as you do), God came over, tapped me on the shoulder, beckoned me over to the corner away from
the others, and had a quick word with me.
He said:
"Viking, you know those prayers you said this morning, and that list of souls you wanted me to save? "
"Yes ?", I said.
"Well, there might be a slight problem".
"What's that?", I enquired further.
"Well', he said, "I looked at the list and most of them, no problem. CasperNZ and George Foreman,
no problem, piece of the proverbial. Akzle, well, he's going to require a little more effort, but even
he should be fine. Even Katman. I mean, there's no point in being a supreme being if you don't use
your supreme powers every once in a while, now, is there?".
"But?", I asked.
"Well, it's the last one on your list. I'm sorry, but even I can't help you there. You're on your own
with that one. What is that 'F' word that Akzle uses all the time ?"
"FUBAR ? "
"Yes, that's one of them. But, yes, FUBAR. I'm sorry. Totally and irrevocably FUBAR".
"Well", I said, "Just do the best you can. Nobody can ask you for anything more. Really appreciate
your effort".
Well, I think it was God. I have to admit that I had forgotten to taken my meds before we went to
church (having been in such a hurry), and by that time, all the voices in my head were starting to
bicker and argue among themselves. A bit like here on KiwiBiker at times.
Once we had gotten home again, taken my tablets, had a cup of coffee and a little sit-down in the
sun, things soon settled down again nicely. And then we went out for the afternoon. Very pleasant.
The thing is, I was out all afternoon (we didn't get home until 5:30pm). You know something else.
My wife and I had a lovely candle-light dinner last night. The first time in ages. Sat in the soft
candle-light, and talked about things while we ate dinner together. It was really very nice.
Well, it was until the linesmen fixed the fault, and the power came back on again.
Anyway, I just haven't had time (as CasperNZ put it) "to summarise yesterday's crap ejaculation".
I mean, I've cast my eyes over the new postings on OAB's thread, and there were a few comments
from you-know-who that caught my eye in passing.
Like:
#368 - "Shit does not travel at a constant speed".
#373 - "Akzle is a lucky b@#$%&* as well" (even though he doesn't have a motorcycle at the moment).
#390 - "Life is full of hazards. You could get run over by a bus tomorrow". Yes, I know what you're
all thinking. It's that "Luck" thing again.
Well, the main point I wanted to make today is that I'm a little disappointed with some of you.
I went out for the afternoon (leaving you all in charge), and what did I find when I got back home
again, you'd gone and hosted a debate while I was away. And it lasted several hours. Far out !
But that wasn't the worst part. Oh No . It was your topic of choice. ABS ???
What were you chaps thinking? C'mon ! If ever there was an item that was well understood, and
didn't need any more debate, it was ABS ! F@#$% a duck !
I suppose you thought that you were on "safe ground" with that topic, and that by throwing in a
few facts, it would be an overwhelming win for you (and you-know-who might shut up for a while).
Well, that definitely was b@#$%&* wishful thinking on your parts.
And then, to make matters worse, because you'd called the debate, you went and let the opposition
team set the rules for the debate.
Now I've since read the fine print in the rules for the debate, and :
- "Allow the introduction of hearsay and unsubstantiated 'facts' ". Haven't you chaps been paying
attention on the Web recently, and seen all those comments about MSM and "alternative facts" ?
- "Not insist on the provision of verifiable data or references"
- "Allow the opposition to interject without warning"
- "Allow the opposition to change the topic without warning".
Again, what were you chaps thinking ? [ Shakes head ]
Anyway, the team of "Good and Enlightment" (which seemed to consist of Gremlin, Ocean1, NZSpokes,
SWBarnet, AllanB and MarkW) was lined up against the team of "Evil and Ignorance" (which consisted
just of you-know-who).
And that's another point.
I suppose you thought that just because you had the numbers in your favour, the debate would be
a push-over.
I mean, I know you're all nice chaps and obviously know your material (based on what you tabled
in OAB's thread). And under "normal circumstances", that should have been more than enough.
But these were not "normal circumstances" . You really were asking to get your a@#$% kicked.
Anyway, the debate went on, and on, and on (a bit like this thread) until finally MadBikeBoy pulled
out an absolute blinder in #394, and the team of "Good and Enlightment" came from behind to surge
past the post and score a resounding win.
Well done , MBB. A little bit late, but well done none the less. A win is a win.
For those of you who don't know what I mean, you'll just have to go to OAB's thread and read
it for yourselves.
Anyway, I hope that you've all learned your lesson, and don't fall for that one again.
You know, I have to say I was surprised that you-know-who had taken crushing defeat so well.
But No, I spoke far too soon.
Sure enough:
#397 - Back comes a reply to MBB's winner (well after the bell, mind you ). Look, the debate
is over - you LOST ! The judges decision is final.
Must ALWAYS have the last word.
Moi and I were talking online later, and I said there must be some condition or psychosis that
describes this desire to "always get the last word in".
I'll try and Google it later on today. I'll let you know what I found out.
And No, #397 wasn't the end of it. Oh No.
#398 - "More people are saved by protective gear than ABS". And not a single piece of data in
sight to justify this "alternative fact".
#401 - "Dog and Lemon Guide says ...... "
and
"My WOF guy says ....... "
#412 - Yes, CasperNZ, you're right. Deep breathing helps. A little. Go out for another ride today.
God knows You've earned it.
Continuing further down OAB's thread will only lead to ECT and medication. Or increased whisky
intake. Please be careful not to mix the two, as it can sometimes make you sleepy.
#416 - And now, just in, another riding safety tip.
-" Follow a car around bends, so that if sh#$% happens, that poor b@#$%&* wears it
and you're safe".
and
-"The two teachers on here might like to comment on that idea".
NO ! Don't fall for it. Don't even think about it. Gremlin, Walk away from the keyboard. Now !
You know, OAB, I really think it's about time that you posted a note on your thread that the
closing date and time for all submissions has passed, and then close the thread. Quickly !
Yes, I know it would be a lie, but everyone else on here does. And it would only be a very
small one.
You could even claim that you were "misunderstood". And once the thread was closed, well,
they wouldn't be able to add any comments and complain. Especially you-know-who.
What ? You can't close the thread ?
It's that "train wreck" thing again, isn't it ? You just can't look away. Yes, I understand.
Sigh !
Well, I did warn you all back on my first post (#56). I've done my best. I'm afraid you're all
on your own now.
As always, safe riding and ..... (yes, you know the rest).
P.S. (whisper) I'm actually surprised that you-know-who hasn't put it in the tagline for their
KB profile.
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Originally Posted by Blackbird
:
at some awards night...
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