After all this time, I've finally worked out,

[jasonu]

i never answer unknown/witheld numbers, nor overseas numbers unless i know some cunt overseas be trying to phone me.
i had an answering machine message to that effect ("if you're calling from a blocked number, get the fuck on, shithead")

i've only had a few spam calls since being in the yellow pages, and not having a landline (whothunk. you pay to have your number listed, and they sell it on), usually resolved with "who this" "how you get my number" "remove this number from your database"

of course, my phone manner is gruff anyway. so most calls are "who this" "how you get my number" "why the fuck you phoning me..."
sorry mum.

and if any cunt phones looking for "the bill payer" or "the householder" they get shitcanned straight away. why you phoning people you dont fucken know, asshole.

It's 'who dis????'.

[sidecar bob]

The Jesus card is also the most efficient way to get off jury service.
Just write back, saying, I believe that nobody should judge another except for Jesus etc.
They don't want people with imaginary friends on jury's it seems.

[F5 Dave]

Nice. .

[Voltaire]

The Jesus card is also the most efficient way to get off jury service.
Just write back, saying, I believe that nobody should judge another except for Jesus etc.
They don't want people with imaginary friends on jury's it seems.

I've worked with a product that's invisible, people pay for and it can kill you for years....should I start a religion?

[Maha]

my phone manner is gruff anyway. so most calls are "who this" "how you get my number" "why the fuck you phoning me..."

You should answer the phone ''Hello Akzle speaking'' they'll probably hang up in your fucking ear.

[Swoop]

International callers are even more fun. If you can get them to "hold on, just a second" they can pay much higher calling rates while you peel the potatoes, watch the TV, etc.

The Jesus card is also the most efficient way to get off jury service.
Just write back, saying, I believe that nobody should judge another except for Jesus etc.
They don't want people with imaginary friends on jury's it seems.

Rather ironic, since they like to use their novel as the book you swear on...

[oldrider]

I've worked with a product that's invisible, people pay for and it can kill you for years....should I start a religion?

Hmm, I have helped for years to produce a high value invisible product that can only kill you once - where did we go wrong?

Start your religion KB is full of followers just begging to be inspired.

[pritch]

There are a variety of ploys to use on these annoying pricks and this thread has about covered them. Last time I did anything like that I asked the "Windows helper" to hang on a sec, and went and hung the washing out.

Now when I answer the phone if there is not an immediate response I hang up.

[F5 Dave]

The international ones have just hacked someone's insecure PABX and are stealing toll calls to do their scamming. They ring like 3 at a time and hang up on the 2 that don't answer first. May Jesus cast their souls into Auckland.

[Akzle]

The international ones have just hacked someone's insecure PABX and are stealing toll calls to do their scamming. They ring like 3 at a time and hang up on the 2 that don't answer first. May Jesus cast their souls into Auckland.

now that's a bit fucken harsh mate

[russd7]

The international ones have just hacked someone's insecure PABX and are stealing toll calls to do their scamming. They ring like 3 at a time and hang up on the 2 that don't answer first. May Jesus cast their souls into Auckland.

hell, you really do want them to get a fate worse than death huh

[Moi]

The international ones have just hacked someone's insecure PABX and are stealing toll calls to do their scamming. They ring like 3 at a time and hang up on the 2 that don't answer first. May Jesus cast their souls into Auckland.

now that's a bit fucken harsh mate

hell, you really do want them to get a fate worse than death huh

Probably wanted to say "cast their souls into Lower Hutt" then realised they'll be living next door...

[granstar]

There are a variety of ploys to use on these annoying pricks and this thread has about covered them. Last time I did anything like that I asked the "Windows helper" to hang on a sec, and went and hung the washing out.

Now when I answer the phone if there is not an immediate response I hang up.

Yep one I use as at least they are not annoying anyone else while they wait for me to find the person they are looking for (me).

I once asked one where they got my number from, and they said a friend gave it to me, I told them my friends wouldn't do that kind of shit thing, they hung up.

Door knockers are better cause in person they can be blasted, once told a couple men in black on bicycles to fark off, and they said Jesus loves you. I followed with " and he can fark off too!", they never came back. Another ploy is " go or i'll set the dog off", none have yet discovered our dog is a ferocious bichon.

[russd7]

, none have yet discovered our dog is a ferocious bichon.

yeah and i have to fight that lil bich off every time i bring beer or whiskey or oysters or even when i just turn up with my wonderful personality

[granstar]

yeah and i have to fight that lil bich off every time i bring beer or whiskey or oysters or even when i just turn up with my wonderful personality

As well as that there is the dog too. Advance warning is a big thing here, ring the bell first with your elbow, you are not going to turn up empty handed are you ( must say haven't yet) , and i'll put poochie away so he doesn't mess with your personality.