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Thread: Farewell ST1050 and some sad news

  1. #31
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    24th June 2004 - 17:27
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    Quote Originally Posted by nerrrd View Post
    You should be really proud of yourself and what you’ve achieved so far.

    I’ve been fortunate enough to have had the support of great counsellors over the years, privately of course so it’s cost me a fortune, but they are out there.

    My parents have been dealing with the consequences of Lewy Bodies Dementia (much later in life) for going on five years now, and the toll it’s had on both of them has been heartbreaking to see, but it has brought the family much closer together.
    I'm sorry to hear that - search out the book by Dr Dale Breslin. Its been our roadmap

  2. #32
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    30th January 2004 - 11:00
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    Brave of you Paul to share those feelings, feelings that us blokes don't have apparently. Keep up your spirits as best you can under this adversity and as always best wishes. You look way too strong and healthy for 63. Act your age, sprout a wobbly gut, go bald (like me), get the old man stooped over walk. Oops, cancel that I'm a stone throw behind you, lets stay young.

    Your comment on us being middle aged white folks with incomes hit a sore point. I feel the same that we are the pariah of society and the workforce these days. Not welcome anywhere except by the IRD who laugh at us as they take our money because we were stupid enough to make an effort to get ahead in life.

    No wonder I ride a bike. The only times I have ever got anything back from my taxes is when I break a leg. I paid for some ridiculously expensive vaccinations for our [adult!] daughters the other day. Others I learned get it free, because unlike me all they learned in life was how to hold their hand out.
    Happiness is a means of travel, not a destination

  3. #33
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    27th December 2018 - 13:53
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    I'm in the retirement zone and 40plus yrs wed , window of opportunity presented itself to get back on a bike . Deciding what to get went from conservative to the extreme . I took the extreme path as the winter years of life are approaching and I thought it is now or never. You just don't know what's round the corner so make the most of today . Best wishes to you both .
    to be old and wise you must first be young and stupid
    I do have a purpose in life , Even if it is as a warning to others

  4. #34
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    17th July 2003 - 23:37
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    Geez Paul. That's a hard for you're plowing. I wish you well. Congrats on the 2 nil.

  5. #35
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    24th June 2004 - 17:27
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    Quote Originally Posted by Big Dog View Post
    Geez Paul. That's a hard for you're plowing. I wish you well. Congrats on the 2 nil.
    Cheers everyone - actually its not that hard... Once you set a course you just have to follow it through and I have found having a bit of a hit list to tick off helps... The hard bits setting the course but you just need to research research research…

    The stress comes from being totally immersed in this but I can honestly say after calling the counsellor and laughing at the silly cow something clicked and I felt a lot better.


    LOL... I actually think we are onto something with Viki but I wont know for a long while yet..

  6. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paul in NZ View Post
    Just and update for anyone that care…


    This experience has drained me. Honestly its been very testing and its no wonder to me I developed cancer. I fully expect the stress to generate the 3rd brush eventually but it’s a risk worth taking. I did a mental health awareness course through work and finally realised the stress I was under (other factors as well which I cant share). So I called one of those 0800 numbers – cheered me right up… I think they employed Billy T – I couldn’t understand most of what he was saying but there was enough to make me realise I’d better sort it myself. I did call the recommended counsellor – she told me I’d called at a bad time…. I laughed for the first time in months… Silly cow…

    So its been very interesting reaching out for help – basically there isn’t any. You need to go privately and then its just random people from the phone book of which most are mad or utterly useless. The medical profession cant help and even the physio wasn’t keen on treating her sore neck once he realised she had FTD because ACC wont cover that… (not once did I mention ACC)
    Sad to here that things have turned to custard, but heartened that you're moving forward with purpose to enjoy your lives. I know what you mean about reaching out for help and the counsellor lottery, and whilst I'm sure most of these people are genuine caring people wanting to help, some of them have less skill at listening than a person behind the bar. That has to be a classic quote on so many levels
    Legalise anarchy

  7. #37
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    12th July 2003 - 01:10
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    Shit. just looked at this thread after a long absence - and almost wish I hadn't!

    Seriously, keep up the fight Paul, both for you and Vicki, you've always struck me as a positive guy so keep it up, persevere!

    (It all puts my niggles and gripes into perspective)
    Winding up drongos, foil hat wearers and over sensitive KBers for over 13,000 posts...........
    " Life is not a rehearsal, it's as happy or miserable as you want to make it"

  8. #38
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    24th June 2004 - 17:27
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    Just a quick catch up...

    Hot and dusty at our place and the lawn is shrivelling so less mowing required. Saturday was a stunner so after the chores we got onto our CX / gravel bikes (ruggedized push bikes of the dropped handle bar sort) and took a ride up the coast, through the estuary board walks to the Waikanae river trails and up to Waikanae for an early dinner (Salt and Wood) and then back down the other side of the river and home via the expressway. Only 35km but it was my first time back on the bike since my cancer operation just before Christmas. I was knackered when we got home and needed to be revived with a wine or 2. Vicki was a star - she misjudged the edge of a path and took a tumble off her bike but she was back up and riding in a flash. Pain does not always equal hurt we say.

    The change of diet, supplements and the exercise has really been good for her - I mean she still has FTD of course but her happiness and inner peace are up and the outward symptoms are reduced. I'd call that winning...

    Sunday we got out the 1970 Triumph TR6C and rode over the hill to the British Car day to catch up with the classic m/c guys and look at all the old cars we used to have back in the day. We grimaced when we remembered the hideous maintenance and suffered no desire to own one but its nice to look.. My personal fave were the guys who restore old agricultural stationary engines etc. Definitely the weird and wonderful with open crankcases and automatic exhaust valves etc. I suppose that's a form of mental illness in itself but we were delighted with the chuffing and all in all it was a fabulous day out.

    All in all Vicki is currently thriving. There is a definite improvement or at the least we are holding the line which is encouraging... It was the first day in months I actually felt like we were living a life and not fighting for one...

  9. #39
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    25th January 2008 - 17:56
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    Play it again Sam! Ah Paul and Vicki. Nothing beats being out there, riding, motorcycling, walking even, just doing it is good.
    Awesome to hear your words, looking forward to many more expedition reports. Off on a 10 or 15 K (not sure yet) wander on me 2 pins, stinking hot and traffic up the WaZoo, but it's gotta be dun.
    Every day above ground is a good day!:

  10. #40
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    Good on you mate. End the day your there for your wife all that matters, u found what matters in life rest of the time is waiting for are moments where we step up nr counted. I done twice for my parents. Twice for my nephew.
    Stress is a nasty one.at the time your too busy getting on with it.
    But when u get time. It can hit you. Reading your. Story am glad u shared thank you.

    Sent from my SOV31 using Tapatalk

  11. #41
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    12th September 2003 - 12:00
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    Can't add much to what the others have said Paul, but like everyone else I'm wishing you guys all the best. Seems like the best people get the toughest breaks, doesn't it? Congrats on the bounceback from the cancer, and I hope it stays that way and you guys get some good times yet.

    And loving stationery engines is most definitely not a mental illness... or maybe it is, and I'm screwed too.

    Keep doing what you're doing mate.

    Simon
    And I to my motorcycle parked like the soul of the junkyard. Restored, a bicycle fleshed with power, and tore off. Up Highway 106 continually drunk on the wind in my mouth. Wringing the handlebar for speed, wild to be wreckage forever.

    - James Dickey, Cherrylog Road.

  12. #42
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    24th June 2004 - 17:27
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    Cheers everyone... Thanks for the kind words but we just see this as us following our belief that there isn't anything that cant be made a little better by attending to the basics... I'm certain that I've sorted this cancer - I know it sounds nuts but I feel well again... (probably a head thing) Vicki is also feeling well - obviously she has some significant issues and being realistic the odds are certainly stacked against her but she is fighting and I'm very proud of her. None of this is easy but we are getting days now when we feel like we are living a life and not fighting for one.


    All I can say is this. Labours 'wellness budget' is a not very funny joke to us.... If you fall between the cracks or have something difficult you are screwed. There is no help and no one will touch you with a 10ft barge pole... A colleague of mine has a sick child with cancer. Yes they have had to advocate but its air ambulances to chch for this and flights and accommodation to starship in akl all around - no problem. Now I'm not trying to compare illnesses because you just cant but the point is if you have an accident or the right illness then there is a marvellous response. If you don't - its completely different... I honestly think that had we had just a touch of care we would have been in better shape and fought back sooner.

  13. #43
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    7th December 2018 - 16:22
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    You are doing a great job.
    If I were local, I’d go for a ride with you and get yous a pint.
    My grandad succumbed to dementia some years ago at 81 - he’d forgotten who I was (didn’t see the bloke too much living in the 09 and he was down in welly)
    Keep doin what ya gotta do. The black dog isn’t a joke - been dealing with that most of my adult life.
    You are a star, more importantly, a star in someone else’s sky.

  14. #44
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    24th June 2004 - 17:27
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    Time for an update…

    Not a lot of time for motorcycling lately but I’m currently rebuilding the clutch / primary on the TR6C so I should get some summer rides in… The primary drive is a shitty dirty job on these old bangers so do it right and forget about it for another 5 years.

    On the health front – its been interesting… In my case I’ve got nowhere. All the mens health fuss and prostate cancer ‘raising awareness’ stuff is just that – raising awareness and trust me I’m aware.. If you are unlucky enough to suffer a surgical issue you quickly become a non person. Due to the mishap I will have erectile dysfunction for life but apparently that’s OK because as a type 1 diabetic in my early 60’s that was going to happen anyway (WTF).. So be warned – if it does not go well – no one will help and you are on your own! Oh it is possible with an injection in yer wosser but at $150 for 4 it’s a high days and holidays thing… Oh well – you do actually get used to it after a while but I cant help but wonder how in the aftermath of some other cancers thers reconstructive surgery and all sorts. Men? ew gross... …

    On the Vicki front – she had a wee speed wobble but shes back on track again. Still driving and working and physically she is doing really really well. Thriving almost but any long conversation tends to devolve into a long roundabout meander because she cant find the right words in the first sentence. LOL but you get used to that as well.. Again there is no support service for people in these early years which is when you have a chance to really make some positive changes and extend their good years – its really frustrating.

    What did upset the apple cart was us having to step in and take custody of the eldest grandkids. 1 is a special guy, ADHD, Asperger’s, Autistic, dyspraxia etc. Put it this way he has OARS funding. This involved dangerous gang members, drugs, and police in 2 towns, Min of Ed, School, Min of Health, IRD, WINZ and Oranga Tamariki. Of course you need a family court lawyer at $280 and hour as well and the stress is horrendous not to mention the expense.. However its settling down a bit now and hes in a better place, doing better at school and above all happy. Pretty bloody frustrating.

    Again – no support apart from the Min of ed and the school who have been brilliant. Police were also very good and kind to us. We were dealing with some fuck off scary unpredictable people… It’s a shame but we were going to be off to Canada mountain biking but – well that’s not happening now so we squandered some cash on a cheap SUV for Vicki – hey if shes getting monstered by gangbangers shes better off in a tank right?? (she freakin loves it too)

    Its not all bad though – there are some seriously nice people out there. The Wellington MTB community have been amazing. Helping out taking Vicki and I on rides (its better to have extra supporters on some rides) and Tim at The Dirt Farm opened up the facility for us to get some drone footage of her riding before its too late. That happened at our darkest time so bless him.. It helped me turn her around again and made her feel like a queen…

    So – in short. If you have prostate cancer ask many many questions and particularly around the worst case scenarios. You do have options…. If you have a loved one with dementia and its early on get checked and contact me – there ARE things you can do to slow it down. Remember 18 months ago she was given 3 to 7 years with only a portion of that being good years and shes doing amazing…

  15. #45
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    25th January 2008 - 17:56
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    Hey you two, sounds to this not so young reasonably healthy shiet head that I'd better pull me socks up and do more, to maybe help my/ourselves and avoid some of the things that have come your way.
    Always good to read what you've written mate, it's raw, out there and 100 % BS free.
    Hang in there guys.
    Every day above ground is a good day!:

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