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Thread: Dangerous sports

  1. #1
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    Dangerous sports

    Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop in Upper Hutt. They head to the bird section and Paddy says to Mick: "Dat's dem."

    The shop owner comes over and asks if he can help them.

    "Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere budgies in dat cage up dere." says Paddy.

    The owner puts the budgies in a paper bag. Paddy and Mick pay for the birds, leave the shop, get into Paddy's pickup and drive to the top of the Rimutakas. Paddy looks down at the 1000 ft. drop and says, "Dis looks like a grand place." he takes two birds out of the bag, puts them on his shoulders and jumps off the cliff.

    Mick watches as Paddy falls all the way to the bottom, killing himself stone dead.

    Looking down at the broken remains of his best pal, Mick shakes his head and says. "Dis budgie jumping is too dangerous for me."

    WAIT!!! there's MORE!

    PART TWO:

    Moments later, Pete arrives up at the summit. He's been to the pet shop too, and walks up to the edge of the cliff carrying another paper bag in one hand and his shotgun in the other.

    "Hey, Mick, watch dis," Pete says. He takes a parrot from the bag and throws himself over the edge of the cliff. Mick watches as, half way down, Pete takes the gun and shoots the parrot. Pete continues to plummet down and down until he hits the bottom and breaks every bone in his body.

    Mick shakes his head and says, "And I'm never trying dat parrotshooting either."

    BUT WAIT!!! there's still MORE!

    PART THREE:

    Mick is just getting over the shock of losing his two friends when Dave appears.

    He's also been to the pet shop and is carrying a paper bag out of which he pulls a chicken. Dave then grasps the chicken by the legs, holds it over his head, and hurls himself off the cliff and disappears down and down until he hits a rock and breaks his spine.

    Once more Mick shakes his head. "First der was Paddy with his budgie jumping, den Pete parrotshooting, and now Dave is hengliding........"
    Yes, I am pedantic about spelling and grammar so get used to it!

  2. #2
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    Gee, what are you saying about Upper Hutt, eh?

    Eh?
    Quote Originally Posted by skidMark View Post
    if you have a face afterwards well... that depends how you act...

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by OMGWTFBBQ
    Gee, what are you saying about Upper Hutt, eh?

    Eh?
    If the cap fits.......
    Experience......something you get just after you needed it

  4. #4
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    It was sent to me by a friend in Minnesota and I had to change all the references as they refered to a pet shop in Dingle and Condor Pass - and the guys were Scandinavian! I figured Upper Hutt was closest to the Rimutakas, which was somewhere many people would recognise!
    Yes, I am pedantic about spelling and grammar so get used to it!

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beemer
    It was sent to me by a friend in Minnesota and I had to change all the references as they refered to a pet shop in Dingle and Condor Pass - and the guys were Scandinavian! I figured Upper Hutt was closest to the Rimutakas, which was somewhere many people would recognise!
    I still think you subconciously hate Upper Hutt. Don't worry, most people do.
    Quote Originally Posted by skidMark View Post
    if you have a face afterwards well... that depends how you act...

  6. #6
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    9th April 2005 - 10:33
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    Not bad.
    Sounds like a few people I know too, espially after some beers,
    juzzer
    Phenoix the bike riding Phoenix.
    For from his crash, he shall rise again.
    And now his Bikes all back together again, YAY

  7. #7
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    3rd March 2004 - 22:43
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beemer
    Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop in Upper Hutt. They head to the bird section and Paddy says to Mick: "Dat's dem."

    The shop owner comes over and asks if he can help them.

    "Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere budgies in dat cage up dere." says Paddy.

    The owner puts the budgies in a paper bag. Paddy and Mick pay for the birds, leave the shop, get into Paddy's pickup and drive to the top of the Rimutakas. Paddy looks down at the 1000 ft. drop and says, "Dis looks like a grand place." he takes two birds out of the bag, puts them on his shoulders and jumps off the cliff.

    Mick watches as Paddy falls all the way to the bottom, killing himself stone dead.

    Looking down at the broken remains of his best pal, Mick shakes his head and says. "Dis budgie jumping is too dangerous for me."

    WAIT!!! there's MORE!

    PART TWO:

    Moments later, Pete arrives up at the summit. He's been to the pet shop too, and walks up to the edge of the cliff carrying another paper bag in one hand and his shotgun in the other.

    "Hey, Mick, watch dis," Pete says. He takes a parrot from the bag and throws himself over the edge of the cliff. Mick watches as, half way down, Pete takes the gun and shoots the parrot. Pete continues to plummet down and down until he hits the bottom and breaks every bone in his body.

    Mick shakes his head and says, "And I'm never trying dat parrotshooting either."

    BUT WAIT!!! there's still MORE!

    PART THREE:

    Mick is just getting over the shock of losing his two friends when Dave appears.

    He's also been to the pet shop and is carrying a paper bag out of which he pulls a chicken. Dave then grasps the chicken by the legs, holds it over his head, and hurls himself off the cliff and disappears down and down until he hits a rock and breaks his spine.

    Once more Mick shakes his head. "First der was Paddy with his budgie jumping, den Pete parrotshooting, and now Dave is hengliding........"

    Then there were the two CIA undercover spooks who went cuba diving and were shot by Castro.
    Free Scott Watson.

  8. #8
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    8th August 2004 - 17:16
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    Quote Originally Posted by OMGWTFBBQ
    I still think you subconciously hate Upper Hutt. Don't worry, most people do.
    Don't know why. The slums are wonderfully multi-coloured and the main road is full of empty buldings and a great big red and grey block, it's a great place to live

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