Famous Last Words

[Zed]

Prompted by a comment made by an esteemed fellow KBer, I searched the Net for some material and came up with this site: Last Words of Real People

Some of the things people say before they die are revealing and astounding, and some are obviously, like, deep psychosis whispers I'm sure of it!

Here's a couple that stood out to me, feel free to add any you found moving.

Elizabeth I, Queen of England (1533-1603)
	"All my possessions for a moment of time."

and prophesying till the end : Nostradamus (Michel de Notre Dame) 1503-1566
	"Tomorrow, I shall no longer be here."

[bugjuice]

smoke me a kipper, i'll be back for breakfast

[Indiana_Jones]

"I'm going out, I may be some time"

or...

"At last I'm king of all Eng.....aghhhh"

-Indy

[Coyote]

One day, history will judge us - Unknown Nazi Soldier

[Krayy]

smoke me a kipper, i'll be back for breakfast

or "Stoke me a clipper..."

or even better....

"Gazpacho soup!!!"

[Indiana_Jones]

"Gazpacho soup!!!"

ahahahaahahahahahah!!!

Ah that shit was f*cking classic!

-Indy

[The_Dover]

shnot gun shnot gun, I can't reach the handle..........

[F5 Dave]

or "Stoke me a clipper..."

or even better....

"Gazpacho soup!!!"

[Shakes hands, fingers pointing down, 'gansta pose'] Whoooaa -Boys from the Dwarf!

[Swoop]

Here's some for ya!!!


"When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car."
Author Unknown

"The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job. But if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house."
Jeff Foxworthy

"If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there is a man on base."
Dave Barry

"Relationships are hard. It's like a full time job, and we should treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks' notice. There should be severance pay, and before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp."
Bob Ettinger

"My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the
lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach
you how to swim."
Paula Poundstone

"A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men." I just want to say to the authors of that study: "Huh?"
Conan O'Brien

"Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my Goodness.... I could be eating a slow learner."
Lynda Montgomery

"The day I worry about cleaning my house is the day Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner."
Roseanne

"I think that's how Chicago got started. A bunch of people in New York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn't cold enough. Let's go west.'"
Richard Jeni

"If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead."
Johnny Carson

"Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography."
Paul Rodriguez

"My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty, and that's the law."
Jerry Seinfeld

"In elementary school, in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest. What is the logic? Do tall people burn slower?"
Warren Hutcherson

"Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same."
Oscar Wilde

"Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet."
Mae West

"Suppose you were an idiot ... And suppose you were a member of Congress .... But I repeat myself."
Mark Twain

"Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least
they can find Kuwait."
A. Whitney Brown

"Women complain about pre-menstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself."
Roseanne

"You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'"
Dave Barry

"If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten."
George Carlin

"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house."
Lewis Grizzard

Advice for the day: If you have a lot a tension and you get a headache,
do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep away
from children"
Author Unknown

"Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar."
Drew Carey

[Krayy]

"Unnnnnnggggghhhhhhhh!!" - Elvis

[DMNTD:Me]

"No, dude, this stuff is completely natural and safe, man. That's why it's called 'herbal'".


"We are now flying over Iraq...."

[vifferman]

"They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance!" - General John Sedgwick, 1864, shortly before a bullet hit him in the head.

[Zed]

Astor, Lady Nancy Witcher Langhorne (1879-1964)
	"Am I dying or is is this my birthday?"

Aretino, Pietro (1492-1556)
	"Now I'm oiled. Keep me from the rats."

Beecher, Henry Ward (1813-1887)
	"Now comes the mystery."

Beethoven, Ludwig van (1770-1827)
	"Friends applaud, the comedy is over."

[SPORK]

"It was a rock-lobstah!"

Nick Ormrod (1990-2094)

[Krayy]

Wife: "Does my butt look big in these?"
(late) Husband: "Ye........"