More things to know

[Heather]

Useless chatter concerning alchol and other matters.


THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Indubitably;
Innovative;
Preliminary;
Proliferation.

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Specificity;
British Constitution;
Passive-aggressive disorder;
Loquacious Transubstantiate.

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY
WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:

Thanks, but I don't want to have sex;
Nope, no more beer for me;
Sorry, but you're not really my type;
Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight;
Oh, I just couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.

THING'S YOU REALLY DID NOT WANT TO KNOW......

During an hour's swimming at a municipal pool you will ingest 1/12
liter of urine.

In an average day your hands will have come into indirect contact with
15 penises (touching door handles etc.)

An average person's yearly fast food intake will contain 12 pubic
hairs.

In a year you will have swallowed 14 insects - while you slept!

Annually you will shake hands with 11 women who have recently
masturbated and failed to wash their hands.

Annually you will shake hands with 6 men who have recently masturbated
and failed to wash their hands.

In a lifetime 22 workmen will have examined the contents of your dirty
linen basket.

At an average wedding reception you have a 1/100 chance of getting a
cold sore from one of the guests.

Daily you will breath in 1 liter of other peoples' anal gases.

[Motu]

Zigactly! hic.

[Motoracer]

Annually you will shake hands with 11 women who have recently
masturbated and failed to wash their hands.

Annually you will shake hands with 6 men who have recently masturbated
and failed to wash their hands.

I didn't know women in general where such wankers (jokening only, please do not take any offence ).

[Jackrat]

Dang right,I didn't need to know that.

[Solarwind]

Who comes up with this stuff anyway?

[Slingshot]

I wouldn't worry to much about that list as 73% of statistics are made up on the spot anyway.

[Coldkiwi]

i think if i even ingested 1/12 of a litre of water i'd be out of the pool spluttering and coughing. the urine content would be WELL below that so I'm definitely going to go out on a limb and say that ones bollocks. as for the rest...I think i'll go with slingshot on those

[Jackrat]

I worked at Pt Erin pools many moons ago,The aceptable level of urine was 6 ppm,So you would be swallowing a fair bit to get to 1/2 liter.
And isn't gas measured in Newton meters,not liters.

[MikeL]

I worked at Pt Erin pools many moons ago,The aceptable level of urine was 6 ppm,So you would be swallowing a fair bit to get to 1/2 liter.
And isn't gas measured in Newton meters,not liters.

And to continue the pedantic tone, 6 ppm seems to me to be a meaningless measurement for urine which is mostly water anyway.
Being a regular user of the Onehunga Aquasport outdoor pool, I'm more worried by the suspended solids...

[Hitcher]

And isn't gas measured in Newton meters,not liters.

Newton metres are pressure units. Litres are volume units. The more pressure, the more gas you can get to fit. PV = nRT

[Coldkiwi]

Newton metres are pressure units. Litres are volume units. The more pressure, the more gas you can get to fit. PV = nRT

to get REALLY pedantic, newton metres are strictly a torque measurement. newtons per metre squared are pressure.

what were we talking about again?

[merv]

In an average day your hands will have come into indirect contact with
15 penises (touching door handles etc.)

Am I a cleanliness freak like John kocinski or something because I cannot believe when I am out using the facilities the number of men that either use the urinal or the booth and then just leave without washing their hands? Me I always soap up and rinse thoroughly and take care not to fondle the door handles too much on the way out. Latest experience was Saturday night, my son wanted us to take him to Valentines fror birthday dinner, sure enough (is he a real man or what) one guy leaves the men's room while I'm there, doesn't wash his hands and he's straight back to the food tables. Its a buffet restaurant for Christ sake. Even worse is pubs - real men just don't wash their hands - the rate would be about 95% from my estimation. So the comment above I can see is very real.

[Motoracer]

I also know that one of the worst ones from the above statistics is very real. But for the sake of you guys, I am not going to mention it.

[Hitcher]

Am I a cleanliness freak like John kocinski or something because I cannot believe when I am out using the facilities the number of men that either use the urinal or the booth and then just leave without washing their hands? Me I always soap up and rinse thoroughly and take care not to fondle the door handles too much on the way out. Latest experience was Saturday night, my son wanted us to take him to Valentines fror birthday dinner, sure enough (is he a real man or what) one guy leaves the men's room while I'm there, doesn't wash his hands and he's straight back to the food tables. Its a buffet restaurant for Christ sake. Even worse is pubs - real men just don't wash their hands - the rate would be about 95% from my estimation. So the comment above I can see is very real.

I don't know where you guys learned "the urinal thing" but where I grew up we got reasonably proficient at the art of pissing and avoiding clothing and other body parts. Provided it gets washed reasonably regularly and thoroughly, your penis should not be a priapism of pustulating pox and touching it will be no more a vector for disease than any other covered body part. Your hands are your greatest food risk, and to be really careful, you should wash them thoroughly AFTER leaving the men's room (unless you can open the door without touching it with your hands). To ensure your hands are well cleaned, sing two verses of "Happy birthday to you" whilst you do it...

[MikeL]

My observation of male hygiene is similar to the above. Hitcher, your point about the over-rated risk is probably true at least in theory. Trouble is, how could we ever be sure? That's why getting into the habit of washing hands after going to the toilet is worthwhile. It does annoy me to think that touching the door handle probably negates the handwashing, so if at all possible I avoid this. I like the practice in some places (e.g. airports) of showing the cleaning schedule (presumably includes wiping the door handle with disinfectant).
But hey it's possible to get too neurotic about this. When I was younger my stomach must have been more delicate because I had much more frequent bouts of tummy trouble. Now that I'm old and tough it rarely happens. Only time I can remember throwing up (apart from the occasional overindulgence in alcohol) was when I ate a single solitary rock oyster at Port Albert. That little critter sure made me suffer for a moment's pleasure. I'm not obsessive about food hygiene so I put it down to tolerance or resistance built up over the years. That's one reason why my generation rarely suffered from allergies the way young people do today. My mother used to say "You've got to eat a peck of dirt before you die".
Now what exactly were we talking about?
I've obviously got too much spare time at work...