Asiana just released the crew's names...
Capt. Sum Ting Wong
Capt. Wi Tu Lo
F.O. Ho Lee Fuk
F.O. Bang Ding Ow
Oh wait, that's from a real newscast!
http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/3588569
Meow
Asiana just released the crew's names...
Capt. Sum Ting Wong
Capt. Wi Tu Lo
F.O. Ho Lee Fuk
F.O. Bang Ding Ow
Oh wait, that's from a real newscast!
http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/3588569
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
Usain Bolt walks into a pub and orders a beer,
the barman says “we don’t serve sambos in here, there’s another pub 3 minutes down the road, go there"
Usain replys “DON’T YOU KNOW WHO I AM!!!, I’m Usain Bolt the fastest man in the world".
The barman says “so sorry, in that case it’ll be 1 min 30 seconds"
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
@ Unstuck- dont be ashamed of what you get up too on home D.
Two guys and a girl get marooned on a desert island.
After one week, the woman is so ashamed of what she's doing, she kills herself!
After another week goes by, the men are so ashamed of what they're doing, they buried her!
After another week, they're so ashamed of what they're doing they dug her back up again!
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
Little Johnny said "Mom, did you know that Anna is an angel?" Mom said "You mean the maid, why do you say that?"
Johnny said "Well, because I saw her naked in your bedroom with her hands on the wall & she was shouting, "oh God I am coming...I am coming ...I am coming... If it wasn't for dad who was holding her tight from behind, she would have gone up to Heaven"
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
A woman is having an affair during the day while her husband is at
work. Her 9 year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch.
The woman's husband also comes home.
She puts her lover in the closet, not realizing that the little boy is in
there already.
The little boy says, "Dark in here."
The man says, "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball."
Man - "That's nice."
Boy - "Want to buy it?"
Man - "No, thanks."
Boy - "My dad's outside."
Man - "OK, how much?"
Boy - "$250"
In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are
in the closet together.
Boy - "Dark in here."
Man - "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball glove."
The lover remembering the last time, asks the boy, "How much?"
Boy - "$750"
Man - "Fine."
A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your glove, let's go
outside and have a game of catch." The boy says, "I can't, I sold my
baseball and my glove." The father asks, "How much did you sell them
for?"
Boy - "$1,000"
The father says, "That's terrible to overcharge your friends like
that...that is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess."
They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the
confession booth and he closes the door.
The boy says, "Dark in here."
The priest says, "Don't start that shit again."
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
Even though funerals are held in the afternoon I still get mourning wood.
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Forum whore
A little girl goes up to her mom and asks, "What's that?"
The mom answers, "A vagina."
And the little girl asks, "Well, when am I gonna get one?"
And the mom answers, "As soon as you grow up."
Then the little girl goes up to her dad and asks, "What's that?"
And the dad answers, "A penis."
So the little girl asks, "Well, when am I gonna get one?"
And the the dad answers, "As soon as your mom goes to work."
Political correctness: a doctrine which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd from the clean end.
Hardcore Biker
3 maoris in court.
Whetu is given 1 year for possession of a knife.
Wiremu is given 5 years for possession of a gun.
Rangi is given 18 months for possession of 60 cents in loose change.
Summing up,the Judge stated, "Although Rangi didn't have a gun or knife,it is my opinion that he was clearly saving up for one"
Meow
Non alcoholic beer is like eating out your sister…
Tastes the same but you just know it’s not right…
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Mr. Responsible
Why do pedophiles always have beards and glasses?
I mean, what is it about that look, that children find so sexy?
Meow
Guy comes home from work, his girlfriend is packing
She’s upset about something, he asks
"honey what’s wrong?"
"I heard you’re a pedophile"
"Pedophile? Wow big word for an eight year old"
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
Q: Why doesn't Chelsea Clinton have any brothers or sisters?
.
.
.
.
.
.
A: Because Monica ate them.
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
Going to get the 12 week scan today!
I can’t wait to see if we’re having a boy or an abortion!
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
Why won’t blacks procreate with Hispanics?
They’re afraid their kids would be too lazy to steal
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
Rumor is that Kate's had a Caesarian. They wanted the baby to come out through the sunroof as a tribute to its grandmother.
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
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