Drew, meet Akzle.Originally Posted by Drew
Que?
Drew, meet Akzle.
Hardcore Punk
You got Its number bro?
For a man is a slave to whatever has mastered him.Keep an open mind, just dont let your brains fall out.
NEDWN VIII
0800 666You got Its number bro?tis the spawn of Eddie.
Grumpy Old Bastard
Sacred fucking shit...
. “No pleasure is worth giving up for two more years in a rest home.” Kingsley Amis
Wearing Hi-Viz Black.
Americans are great at proving stereotypes with their government,
They put a Texan in charge and they went looking for oil.
They placed a black man in charge, now it's run out of money and it's stopped working.
TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”
Anarchic Wild Child
Well - I did put it in the Sick Jokes thread ... that should have told you something ...
"So if you meet me, have some sympathy, have some courtesy, have some taste ..."
KB's Chief Cats
i wonder at what you typed into google to find that....
She has pretty eyes though...
Hardcore Punk
Are you sure???
For a man is a slave to whatever has mastered him.
Anarchic Wild Child
I didn't Google it - a mate sent the link .. I thought you all deserved it ...
Pretty sure - but maybe hermaphrodite ...Are you sure???
"So if you meet me, have some sympathy, have some courtesy, have some taste ..."
Meow
I'm a fan of pedo jokes tbh.
What's 1 good thing about pedos? At least they slow down around schools.
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
They call me Mr Fahrenheit
Whereas you you were tempted to post it in the pics that make you jizz thread?
Keep on chooglin'
Meow
What Do You Call
the useless flesh around a vagina?
A woman.
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
Guy orders a bowl of soup
When the waitress sets the bowl down on the table, the guy notices, she has her thumb in her soup.
The guy says, "I'm not eatiing that soup, after you had your thumb in it."
Waitress says, "Oh yeah, I'm really sorry about that, but I have an infection in my thumb, and my doctor told me to keep it warm and moist."
The guy replies, "Why don't you stick it up your ass then you stupid bitch."
The waitress says, "Oh I do when I'm back in the kitchen."
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
Husband said, "Darling, let's try something new in the bedroom... I'll get some chocolate spread, some whipped cream, and a few strawberries.
"Then I'll paint my cock with the chocolate spread, and call the kids in for a 'special treat'. Then, one by one, I'll pop the strawberries up my arse, squirt cream down my crack, and while Emily deepthroats me for the last of the chocolate, Jessica can my lick my arsehole and swallow strawberries as I shit them out.
"Then it'll be time to pop their cherries. I'll start with Jess cos she's already 9, she'll be a bit more developed. While I'm fucking her childish vagina, Emily can lick up the blood and get her own tiny cunt ready for a good stretching.
"Then I'll finish off by banging them in the arse a couple of times before squirting my creamy load over their faces. Shall we give it a go?"
His wife looked stunned. "OVER MY DEAD BODY!" she said.
Husband replied, "Fuck me, you're into some weird shit."
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
Meow
A modern day cowboy has spent many days crossing the Dakota prairie without water.
His horse had already died of thirst. He's crawling along the dusty ground, certain that he has breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out of the ground several yards ahead of him.
He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the ground and discovers what looks to be an old briefcase. He opens it and out pops a genie.
But this is no ordinary genie. She is wearing an IRS ID badge and a dull grey dress. There's a calculator in her pocketbook. She has a pencil tucked behind one ear.
'Well, cowboy,' says the genie, 'You know how I work....You have three wishes.'
'I'm not falling for this,' said the cowboy, 'I'm not going to trust an IRS genie.'
'What do you have to lose? You've got no transportation, and it looks like you're a goner anyway!'
The cowboy thinks about this for a minute and decides that the genie is right.
'OK! I wish I were along-side a lush spring with plenty of food and drink.'
POOF
The cowboy finds himself beside the most beautiful spring he has ever seen, and he's surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.
'OK, cowpoke, what's your second wish?'
'My second wish is that I was rich .... beyond my wildest dreams.'
POOF
The cowboy finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.
'OK, cowpuncher, you have just one more wish. Better make it a good one!'
After thinking for a few minutes, the cowboy says, 'I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me.'
POOF
He was turned into a tampon. Moral of the Story:
If the U.S. government offers to help you, there's going to be a string attached.
What's the point in living if you don't feel alive?
Toying with ones mortality shouldn't be this much fun.
There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)
Posting Permissions
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks