I miss the 1970s,a more
innocent time.
You never saw an angry
Lego man in those days,they
were all on acid.
My girlfriend has almond eyes.
Nutty.
Peter Dockrill of Science Alert
has recently published an article
stating: We might finally understand
why Glass Frogs have strangely
transparent skin.
I'm not exactly David Attenborough,but
could it because glass is transparent.
I love my home cinema system
so much,I named it.
When watching films,I make sure
I have the Susan surround sound on.
( Taxi ordered )
I arrived at the gym and said
hello to this girl as I walked
in.
She said,"That's out of order!"
I said "Sorry,I didn't mean to
cause any offence"
"No" she said,"Lizzo just used
the treadmill,it's out of order."
My wife says I'm useless with
our finances and totally inept
at managing our accounts.
Well shes about to be proven
so wrong!
Just received a letter from IRD
complimenting me on my taxes.
They say they're outstanding.
I just ordered a load of cystomised
fortune cookies I've had them done
in Braill so the blind can enjoy
them.
They will read:"Nothing is written."
Paddy accidently kills his Dad's sister
in a fit of drunken rage 10 years ago
and buried her body in the woods...
Now he's shitting himself because
somebody has invented a test to detect
Auntybodies.
The amount of fake news nowadays is
unPresidented.
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