Results 1 to 15 of 15

Thread: Blonde Jokes

  1. #1
    Join Date
    18th October 2005 - 20:19
    Bike
    .
    Location
    .
    Posts
    2,025

    Blonde Jokes

    "Borrowed" from another forum I belong to:

    BLONDE LOGIC
    Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking... and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away...
    Florida or the moon?" The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida...?????"

    CAR TROUBLE
    A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
    She says, "What's the story?" He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor". She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"

    SPEEDING TICKET
    A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely ifhe could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"

    RIVER WALK
    There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?" The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."

    BLONDE ON THE SUN
    A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We were the first on the moon!" The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!" The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian. To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"

    IN A VACUUM
    A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
    She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

    FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
    A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"
    "HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    1st July 2005 - 04:15
    Bike
    Superman's Bike
    Location
    Auckland
    Posts
    248
    very very clever i do like the one about going to the sun at night but well blonds spend to much time trying to get their twin out the mirror
    Whats that star?, its the deathstar, what does it do?, it does death!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    16th September 2005 - 19:50
    Bike
    written off GPX250
    Location
    Auckland
    Posts
    142
    I knew a blonde that was so stupid that when driving to the airport she saw the sign "Airport Left", consequently turned around and drove home.
    Young & dumb!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    24th January 2005 - 15:45
    Bike
    2022 Suzuki GSX250R
    Location
    Manawatu
    Posts
    2,209
    The speeding ticket one was primo, hadn't heard that one before.

    Guy at one of the places I worked was telling blonde jokes to his mates. I said "bet your girlfriend has a really sore belly button after sex" and he says "why? she's not blonde." "No, but you are..." quoth I.

    His mates pissed themselves at his expense - proving that those in glass houses should not get undressed in the lounge and those who have anything other than dark or red hair should not tell blonde jokes within sight and hearing of me...

    He took it well, weathered the laugher and said to his mates "he's not bad for a technician, is he?"
    Motorbike Camping for the win!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    8th August 2004 - 17:16
    Bike
    1999 GSXR1100W, 1975 CT90
    Location
    Upper Hutt
    Posts
    5,551
    YA GOtta be-surr that yur not makk-in it upp firstt...

    COz the res-ults cood be dis-asteruss...

    :spudflip:

  6. #6
    Join Date
    7th November 2004 - 11:00
    Bike
    Aquired by locals
    Location
    Groote Eylandt
    Posts
    6,606
    Hehehe, couple of those were new to me......... Argh Alarumba/Wari?
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

  7. #7
    Join Date
    7th July 2005 - 12:06
    Bike
    .
    Location
    North Shore, Auckland
    Posts
    917
    how do you kill a blonde????











    put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool










    I may have already posted that at some point.......
    Cibby play thing

  8. #8
    Join Date
    17th February 2004 - 13:09
    Bike
    Triumph Tiger 800
    Location
    Kapiti
    Posts
    2,741
    Quote Originally Posted by ZZR
    "Borrowed" from another forum I belong to:
    There is other forums????
    Experience......something you get just after you needed it

  9. #9
    Join Date
    3rd February 2004 - 08:11
    Bike
    2021 Street Triple RS, 2008 KLR650
    Location
    Wallaceville, Upper hutt
    Posts
    5,223
    Blog Entries
    5
    How many Blonde jokes are there?

    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .

    only one, the rest are all the truth.
    it's not a bad thing till you throw a KLR into the mix.
    those cheap ass bitches can do anything with ductape.
    (PostalDave on ADVrider)

  10. #10
    Join Date
    18th October 2005 - 20:19
    Bike
    .
    Location
    .
    Posts
    2,025
    Quote Originally Posted by sels1
    There is other forums????
    Yea, sad but true, now if this forum only dealt with ZZR's on a technical basis that would be a different story

  11. #11
    Join Date
    31st October 2005 - 21:24
    Bike
    SUZUKI road & Kawasaki race bike
    Location
    New Plymouth
    Posts
    1,526
    hahahahahahaha..... i love it.... i never get tired of blonde jokes....
    i think they are limitless.....
    Taking it to the track thanks to: KIWIBIKE INSURANCE & PIRELLI TYRES, EXPERIENCE MOTORCYCLES, EBC Brakes, SUPERSPROX Sprockets, TSUBAKI Chains, RST Leathers, REPSOL Oils, FutureGrafix, Autolink

  12. #12
    Join Date
    25th October 2002 - 17:30
    Bike
    GSXR1000
    Location
    Christchurch
    Posts
    9,291
    Quote Originally Posted by alarumba
    YA GOtta be-surr that yur not makk-in it upp firstt...

    COz the res-ults cood be dis-asteruss...

    :spudflip:


    Wari??? You trapped in alarumbas body?

  13. #13
    Join Date
    19th October 2004 - 12:00
    Bike
    1998 suzuki RG150e (AETC)... X2
    Location
    Canterbury University
    Posts
    427
    I suffer from hooliganism.... Know me before you judge me
    http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/sh...7&postcount=83
    i need to practice my "this shit doesn't burn" face
    Welcome, ZorsT.
    You last visited: 1st November 2007 at 22:15

  14. #14
    Join Date
    25th June 2005 - 10:56
    Bike
    EX500s - Ruby
    Location
    Napier
    Posts
    3,754
    A blonde heard on the radio that it was to snow that night, 8 - 10 inches were expected & could the residents of the street park their cars on the even-numbered side to allow the snow ploughs through. So she did.
    The next night the radio repeated the snow warning & requested that cars were parked on the odd-numbered side of the street. She did.
    The following night, & the same snow warning, but then the power went off before the side of the street was announced. Blonde was all upset not knowing what to do.....
    her husband just asked her to leave the car in the garage this time.
    Diarrhoea is hereditary - it runs in your jeans

    If my nose was running money, I'd blow it all on you...

  15. #15
    Join Date
    9th December 2005 - 21:40
    Bike
    Barry
    Location
    Ellerslie
    Posts
    183
    My sister is a TOTAL blonde...
    When driving down the motorway on the way to the zoo the offramp had a sign above it saying Zoo/Motat... she thought motat was the maori name for zoo!!
    I'm gonna make it so PC

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •