My friend has cancer

[Colapop]

Good work B, don't go down without a fight. Here's hoping all is good for you and your family.

[MSTRS:Me]

This sucks. If he has no show of surviving (hope he does tho) then get him out on his bike with you as much as possible whlie he still can.

[APPLE]

I want to thank you everyone for your Thoughts and Prayers,Paul is very weak,hes in a little bit of pain,But stable,the doctors will operate on tuesday,to see how bad it is,paul has 3 sons to previous relationships,None of them know yet.I just dont know how they are going to take it..... Thankyou everybody...

[soundbeltfarm]

sorry about the news man.
i found out that a family friend has leukemia just before christmas.
he only a couple years younger than me at 25,
and to make it worse they told him his blood match is pretty rare 1 in a million (dont quote me on that but im sure thats what he told me)
he going to palmy for about 6 months he reckons.
it a cruel world out there.i often wonder why dont all the bad bastards get all these illnesses as most of the time it is bloody good people that get it.

[TonyB]

Terrible news Apple. I can offer only three bits of advice- once he ends up in hospital make sure he gets visitors, it's boring as hell in there and it's also incredibly depressing watching the people around you die- more so I guess when you know your time is coming...

As Boris said- be happy around him, talk about good stuff. Every one is different, but some people can't stand it when people gush on "you poor bugger, it's so unfair etc"

The other thing is, if he can't beat it 'remember him how he used to be'. By that I mean that if he can't beat it ,then before the end he is likely to become a shadow of his former self. Don't remember him like that.

[SPman]

Life can be a barstard, kicking you when you least expect it, just as it can lift you to the heavens. Having lost parents, relations, aquaintances and a good friend to this bloody terrible scourge, all I can say is, do what you're doing - be there for them when they need it, listen to them and try to cram in as much good stuff as you can. As Tony said - he'll live on in your memories - let them be happy ones.
Boris - good to hear from you and good luck on your tests - keep up the fight man - do all you can to beat it.

[Edbear]

Sorry to hear that mate. A good friend of mine we visited in Taupo today has been told he only has a couple months, now. Real bummer! His main concern is that his family can't bear to see him go, especially this way! A son-in-law is bringing him up in couple weeks to go fishing, hope he's well enough a the time. Always hard to know what to say, but just being there is a comfort for him.

[kevie]

My wife and father in law had cancer at the same time, he lost the battle, my wife beat it, was sooooo touch and go a few times, and then had cancer a second time and winning that one too.
In hindsite the thing that brought us through it was the positive support of Sue and George (Ulyssean friends of ours) they were continually there, supportive and not offended when we threw the toys out of the cot in frustration fear and stress. (our initial reaction to the news was NUMB, then came the FEAR and times of FRUSTRATION and ANGER.
I say to anyone who has a friend with cancer... wether you know they will pull through or not .... be there ... be positive, supportive and if they say not so nice things hug them and tell them youre their friend...no matter what.
We took Lois (wife) for wheelchair rides to the cafe and outside and done things, she appreciated it, dont be scared to have fun with them, if they up to it take them for a tikkitour.
My wife said some mean things when she was under the influence of the morphine (some funny things too) and some convos we had to wait a couple days for the reply which was dropped into the middle of another convo.

But we will forever be appreciative of Sue and George ... hoping to get George registered on this site soon, Hes gotta be the most awesome friend I know.

summing up .. they best thing you can be to someone with cancer is a close friend.

[Streetwise]

well i must say this is a thread that makes me think, I was winging on the other thread about shit, But this really brings life into prospective, I hope you all within this thread get or stay well,

[justsomeguy]

I hope he makes it and that his family and friends are able to gather round and keep their faith.

Don't really know what else to say.

[surfchick]

hi apple- that's a hard thing to find out about a friend - hang in there
from alex

[Mrs Busa Pete]

I was reading this last night and i felt very sad.just before christmas i was going for a routen op when they discovered a tumor on my adrenial gland this was very scrary stuff and having the support of family and freinds helped me heaps.So if you can be there just for him to talk to and be able to tell you his fears and concerns.It will be hard to hear some of what he has to say but let him talk because there is so much that will be running about his head regarding his family and how they are going to cope when and IF he goes all sorts of silly little and big things as well.Dont offer advice reasure him of thing you can do to help but let him talk himself silly if that is what he wants.
All the best mate and good luck Wendy & Pete
(ps) mine has been removed and it was B9 but was still very scary untill then

[APPLE]

thanks......kevie,streetwise,justsomeguy,surfchick ,and busapete? im happy to say that paul is doin fine,hes had the big op,they managed to kill off most of the cancer,but theres still some there,hes undergoing chemo''now.hes lost a hell of a lot of weight,but yeh' yah no hes slowly coming right.obviously things will never be the same for him,his kidneys and bladder hav packed up,so hes gotta piss in a bag and that,but hes taking things alot slow these days THANKS GUYS..............