Rectum stretcher

[Al]

Apologies (yeah, right!) to all the Mr Plods......



Radar Gun

While I was driving down the road the other day (going a little faster
than I should have been) I passed over a bridge only to see a cop on the
other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The cop pulled me over, walked
up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know about,
asked "what's your hurry"?

To which I replied,"I'm late for work."

To which he asked, "What do you do?"

"I'm a rectum stretcher" I responded.

The cop was surprised and confused. "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just
what does a rectum stretcher do?"

"Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to
two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in, I work side
to side, until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely
stretch the hole, until it's about 6 feet."

Then the cop asked cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six foot
asshole?"

To which I politely replied, "You give him a radargun and park him behind a
bridge..."



Traffic ticket: $95.00

Court Costs: $45.00

Look on the cop's face: Priceless

[Lord Pac]

[Skyryder]

Priceless. Money well spent.

Skyryder.

[Shawn]

one of the best joke...

[Wenier]

shit mate that is funny shit wish i could think up something like that. at least the thinks werent to bad

[Kiwi]

While she was "flying" down the road yesterday (10 miles over the limit), a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?"

To which she replied, "I'm late for work."
"Oh yeah," said the cop, "What do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.

The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"

"Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my way
up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in.
I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I
slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."
"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?" he asked.
"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge."

Traffic Ticket $95.00
Court Costs. $45.00


The Look on Cop's Face. PRICELESS

[Black]

Haha, nice one. Personally, I woulda given her a warning ... except I'm not a 6 foot arsehole, I'm only 5"10.

[Back Fire]

haha, very amuzing

[XP@]

While I was riding down SH2 today, (going a little faster than I should have been) I passed under a bridge only to see a copper on the other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The copper pulled me over, walked up to my bike, and with that classic patronising smirk, asked:

"Runway too short?"

To which I replied, "I'm late for work."

To which he asked, "What do you do?"

I'm a rectum stretcher," I responded.

The copper was surprised and confused.

"A what...? A rectum stretcher??

And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"

"Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in, work side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly, but surely stretch the hole, until it's about 6 feet."

Then the copper asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do you do with a six-foot arsehole?"

To which I politely replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..."

Speeding ticket: $120.00

Penalty Points : 30

Court costs: $45

Look on copper's face: Priceless

[Mrs Busa Pete]

Bloody priceless have to remeber that one

[scumdog]

It's o.k. for you guys but when I say:

"And I'm a richard retarder"

And they say:

"What's that?"

and I say:

"A dick stopper"

They ruin it all by saying:

"I'm making a PCA against you, you can't say that to me!"

I guess the fact it still costs them money makes them feel they 'lost' eh?

[Switch]

bahahahahah very good

[tomthepohm]

RECTUM STRETCHER
While she was "flying" down the road yesterday (10 miles over the limit), a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.

The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?"
To which she replied, "I'm late for work." "Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?" "Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, thenwith my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."

"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?" he asked.

"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..."


Traffic Ticket $95.00
Court Costs. $45.00
The Look on Cop's Face. PRICELESS

[WickedOne]

RECTUM STRETCHER
While she was "flying" down the road yesterday (10 miles over the limit), a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.

The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?"
To which she replied, "I'm late for work." "Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?" "Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, thenwith my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."

"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?" he asked.

"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..."


Traffic Ticket $95.00
Court Costs. $45.00
The Look on Cop's Face. PRICELESS

Oldie but a goodie. How you doing mate?

[placidfemme]

lmao... I love it