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Thread: Friday Funny

  1. #1
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    14th August 2005 - 21:00
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    Friday Funny

    Sorry if this has been posted before.... but tickled my funnybone
    Number 8 would have to be the best!!

    Ten Thoughts to Ponder for 2006

    Number 10 - Life is sexually transmitted.
    Number 9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
    Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
    Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
    Number 6 - Some people are like a Slinky...not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
    Number 5 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
    Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
    Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
    Number 2 - In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
    AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006 - We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of homeland security
    "Some people say that one's personality is reflected by the way they ride their bike........I’m screwed"

  2. #2
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    2nd April 2005 - 11:58
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    Yup number 8 good - not hungry now...
    They shall not grow old as we that are left grow old.
    Age shall not weary them nor the years condemn.
    At the going down of the sun and in the evening,
    we will remember them

  3. #3
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    13th January 2005 - 11:00
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  4. #4
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    11th December 2005 - 12:11
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    yep that pretty much sums us up

  5. #5
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    5th August 2005 - 13:36
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    Quote Originally Posted by bugjuice
    but i'm both most of the time..
    What you need is that custard/jelly/baked bean wrestling stuff.....
    Quote Originally Posted by Dave Lobster View Post
    Only a homo puts an engine back together WITHOUT making it go faster.

  6. #6
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    13th January 2005 - 11:00
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    i'm not really into that stuff.. baked beans just aren't natural.
    the other two are good tho..

  7. #7
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    14th August 2005 - 21:00
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    Another !!!

    It's your decision!


    This test only has one question, but it's a very important one.

    By giving an honest answer, you will discover where you stand morally.
    No one else will know, so you won't be fooling anyone but yourself if
    you give anything but a truthful answer.The test features an unlikely,
    completely fictional situation in which you will have to make a
    decision.Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous.
    Please read slowly and thoughtfully, giving due consideration to each
    line.

    Here's the situation:

    You are in Florida; Miami to be specific. There is chaos all around you
    caused by a hurricane with severe flooding. This is a flood of Biblical
    proportions. You are a photojournalist working for a major newspaper,
    and you're caught in the middle of this epic disaster.

    The situation is nearly hopeless. You're trying to shoot career-making
    photos. There are houses and people swirling around
    you, some disappearing under the water. Nature is unleashing all of its
    destructive fury.

    Suddenly you see a man floundering in the water. He is fighting for his
    life, trying not to be taken down with the debris. You move closer...
    Somehow the man looks familiar.?You suddenly realise who it is ....
    it's George W. Bush, President of the United States!!

    At the same time you notice that the raging waters are about to take
    him under ... forever.

    You have two options - you can save the life of George W. Bush, or you
    can shoot a dramatic Pulitzer Prize winning photo, documenting the death of
    one of the world's most powerful men.

    So here's the question, and please give an honest answer:

    Would you select high contrast colour film, or would you go with the
    classic simplicity of black and white?
    "Some people say that one's personality is reflected by the way they ride their bike........I’m screwed"

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