The Truth about Auckland

[Finn]

Yeah, yeah, posted before. Ever ran a search for Auckland?

http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Auckland

[Grahameeboy]

Yeah, yeah, posted before. Ever ran a search for Auckland?

http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Auckland

Nothing has changed then..??

[Swoop]

Haha! Loved it. Many a true word said in jest...

[Aucker]

I've been thinking about moving to somewhere like Tauranga, much safer lol!

Uncyclopedia, a trap for new players.

[skelstar]

THat was a goodie. Liked the Wellington one:

Wellington is for nature lovers as well as arts and culture enthusiasts. Wellington is not for fat people, neither is it particularly welcoming to ugly ones.

[Phurrball]

The Dunedin (Scarfieville) entry is pretty lame...the Auckland entry though is priceless

[limbimtimwim]

http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Your_wife

"This Childish Misogynistic Humor-related article is a pile of crap. The stubmitter may also have crabs. Click here to help cure crabs."

tehehehehehehehehehe

[myvice]

And for bikes...

Motorcycle
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

Motorcycle (noun: pronounced MOE TORE PSY KUL) is a vehicle sort of like 1/2 a car. It usually has only two wheels but it can also have three. Most often one in the front and one in the back. Sort of like a gangbang of rubber with a motor usually causing vibration. The vibration can be good or bad depending on the state of tune the motor or wheels are in. A bad vibration can turn into a wobble (not a bird) and cause an accident. The accident can be minor or serious. And Minors should NOT operate motorcycles, or operate ON them.

Especially if it is your motorcycle. In a serious motorcycle accident you can be hurt or killed and even HURT & KILLED. Remember! If you are killed you won't be able to fix your motorcycle. In the unfortunate case you really do get killed.. drink plenty of beer. Bikers always have beer nearby. When you drink too much beer you will start to pee. When this happens you will come back to life and probably pass out. This is a good thing. Exception is if a cop finds you passed out next to your bike in a puddle of your own piss. You will be alive and probably get arrested, If you do.. tell the officer TO PISS OFF !.

Motorcycles can have from one to ten pistons in their engine. Thus being a single cylinder sometimes found in dirt bikes. Sometimes not seen in dirty bikes.These are mostly 650 cc's or less. A two cylinder can be called a TWIN. Twins can be side by side known as horizontal twins, Not common in motels. But twins in a motel can also be twice the fun. A twin with one cylinder in the front and one in the rear and having 30 to 60 degrees or more angle between cylinder 'heads' is called a V-Twin. These have different exhaust sounds than single or multi-cylinder engines to a trained ear. Twin sizes are 100 cc to 1800 cc's. Harley Davidson & Indians. In 1848, General Hog-Willy Davidson killed all the Indians {The Indians didn't have enough beer to come back to life}.

Harley Davidsons make a unique sound sometimes causing PANIC if the bike pulling in the driveway is NOT yours and the house and the woman in the bed with you also are not yours either. This can result in a form of motorcycle accident in the same sense that you can get hurt or killed or even hurt & killed.

A three cylinder motorcycle is called a three cylinder motorcyle, rarely a multi-cylinder. A four cylinder is more common. These are four cylinders across known as the UJE or universal Jap engine. They can also be fake looking twins with actually 2 pistons in each double cylinder. An antique motorcycle can be a 4 cylinder in line. If you should ever see one of these on the road and it is moving look fast because you'll be passing it soon. Another 4 cylinder motorcycle can be a horizontal type seen in BMWs. Don't stare and get caught looking at another man's BM. Motorcyle engines fire in cycles or strokes. Strokes are two or four strokes. Two strokes sound different than four strokes, more like a buzzing or popping sound. Four strokes not to be confused with forestrokes, foreskins, foreplay, forefit or forshitsake develope power in 4 rotations of their crankshaft. Crankshafts can be a future discussion. Mororcycles can be both inexpensive on gas and expensive on maintence and repair. They can be a lot of fun (like sex) to ride properly. They can also supply a great deal of adrenalin rush to "speed or thrill" addicts. Motorcyles can be customized many ways to suit the owner's taste. These are sometimes called bikes, scoots, bobbers, hard tails, soft tails, choppers, rides, and sleds. Furthermore when they are broken out of gas or do not start they are sometimes called Piece of shit, Mutherfucker, Cocksucker, Dumbbitch, Whore, and or Fukinshit